Boneless Kegels
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bonelesshegel.bsky.social
Boneless Kegels
@bonelesshegel.bsky.social
im so gay for moleman and the destruction of ICE
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Want to feel ancient?

Their oldest kid is 15 now.
December 26, 2025 at 7:09 PM
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everyone always talks about salt of the earth people, but I wanna meet a pepper of the sea guy
December 27, 2025 at 2:05 AM
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two things are true:

in a remote setting, on a dark night, the deep sky is a truly profound experience that has influenced human philosophy, faith and religion for countless generations

and

that experience got absolutely rinsed by the first RCA 10 inch television
December 27, 2025 at 3:46 AM
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here we go (police incident report follows)
December 26, 2025 at 2:43 AM
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I was born in April 1805

Napoleon was master of Europe

Only the BRITISH FLEET stood before him

Oceans were now battlefields
December 24, 2025 at 11:09 PM
my mom just unironically used the term "Nazi stud farm" and now it's going to be in my head all day
December 25, 2025 at 4:41 AM
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I bought my wife an O. Henry book for Christmas and it turns out she just sold her eyes.
December 17, 2024 at 6:08 PM
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Second anniversary of our Apple TV’s spectacular attempt to understand me asking for “Hercule Poirot’s Christmas”
December 23, 2025 at 7:25 PM
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Jesus, can you hear me? Good, the comms are working. Now, you're gonna need to run if you want to evade those Roman soldiers. Hold down A to sprint. Go ahead and try it. ... Good work! You just might be the savior yet. Now pick up that AR-15 and let's do some target practice.
December 24, 2025 at 3:32 AM
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I want a Dune-themed cross-stitch that reads “CHOAM is where the heart is.”
December 23, 2025 at 6:19 AM
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Anyone who sends people to concentration camps to be tortured should be tried and, if found guilty, hanged like the Nazis they are.
December 22, 2025 at 11:19 PM
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new policy proposal: registered organ donors each get one free kill
December 21, 2025 at 8:21 PM
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Inside you there are two weasels. Sorry, we ran out of wolves.
December 21, 2025 at 4:08 AM
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‘No! Not Larry Summers!’ Wails Devastated Nation
‘No! Not Larry Summers!’ Wails Devastated Nation
WASHINGTON—Responding to recent revelations suggesting the prominent economist was a close associate of the late child sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein, a devastated nation reportedly joined together to...
theonion.com
December 20, 2025 at 12:30 AM
I'm irrationally proud of spotting musk as a conman and asshole LONG before the Thailand cave incident, and actually had people getting mad at me bc I said he was a moron.
December 19, 2025 at 8:46 PM
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smoking a joint with Wario on this porch in the winter would fix me
When I was a kid I used to bring Wario over to this spot and pretend he lived here
December 18, 2025 at 5:23 PM
December 17, 2025 at 2:53 AM
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“Oh you should be online to try to provide value to your political side” fuck that that’s nerd shit you should be online because you’re unwell and need to tell people about weird animals you saw
December 15, 2025 at 6:48 PM
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THEY'VE PUT ME ON THE POCKETSTATION COOP. I'M BEING RENDERED IN A 32 BY 32 GRID OF MONOCHROME PIXELS. THE BOYS BACK AT QUANTICO SAID THEY'RE GOING TO RELOCATE ME TO A "DOKO DEMO ISSYO" UNTIL THEY CAN GET THIS STRAIGHTENED OUT.
December 13, 2025 at 9:24 PM
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Going to start posting this every time I catch myself coming close to wading into video game discourse.
December 17, 2024 at 1:54 AM
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December 11, 2025 at 9:07 PM
December 11, 2025 at 1:14 AM
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How To Find The Girls That Wanna Fuck Beautiful Office Ladies Who Have A Lot of Pent-Up Stress Are Fuckable In The Office
December 7, 2025 at 1:00 AM
December 6, 2025 at 10:29 PM
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if what I did was a "war crime" then how come I'm not in trouble
December 1, 2025 at 8:32 PM