CaptainKinetic
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captainkinetic.bsky.social
CaptainKinetic
@captainkinetic.bsky.social
I don't exist, and neither do you.
Reposted by CaptainKinetic
"I went on Twitter and I saw all these terrible posts"
Oh fuck man really? Did you also go to the dump and find a bunch of rotting food? Why are you making it my problem now.
January 6, 2026 at 6:47 AM
Reposted by CaptainKinetic
The latest HR nonsense: A gay man in Utah attends a watch party for the gay hockey show wearing a “Gay AF” t-shirt & is forced to leave the bar because multiple women complained to management about the presence of a man who they feared might get turned on by the TV show.
January 10, 2026 at 2:56 AM
Reposted by CaptainKinetic
it's kind of pathetic that, even in this deeply evil political climate, Kyle Rittenhouse was too annoying to turn murdering someone into a rightwing pundit career. his full time job is that he has a blue check and posts things like "ha ha should i kill someone again" for money
Kyle Rittenhouse thinks the murder of an American citizen in Minnapolis by an ICE Nazi is hilarious. 😳👇
January 8, 2026 at 2:16 AM
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Kyle MacLachlan makes a Twin Peaks themed Bento Box

youtu.be/YmI5iG0qakU
January 8, 2026 at 2:13 AM
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Scully let's split up. I'll interview this beautiful botanist and you go check out the sewer system full of human bones
January 7, 2026 at 1:37 PM
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one problem with learning is it will make you so angry at how stupid everything is
January 3, 2026 at 4:24 PM
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They're adding Disgaea Item Dungeons to Coke Freestyle machines you can venture 200 floors into root beer to unlock Tropical Barq's now
January 7, 2026 at 3:14 AM
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snake. you're going to have to eat that entire onion. raw. like an apple.
January 6, 2026 at 2:00 AM
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In case you missed it, BIG HOPS is coming out January 12th on Steam, Switch, and PS5! #indiegames #nintendoswitch #ps5
January 6, 2026 at 12:56 AM
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"Six-piece Chicken McNobody" is hands-down THE most withering insult known to man
December 26, 2025 at 3:29 AM
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word.
January 1, 2026 at 7:52 PM
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The Port Huron Times Herald
December 28,1915
December 29, 2025 at 3:04 AM
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焚き火 #Onionアート
December 27, 2025 at 12:25 PM
Reposted by CaptainKinetic
vegeta: gohan.

gohan: BGAHG- don't appear out of nowhere like that-

vegeta: you're a nerd, right.

gohan: -i. wouldn't put it that way-

vegeta: NERD. i need your help.

gohan:

vegeta: someone called me a 'code lyoko ass bitch' and i need you to tell me what that means before i beat them up.
December 27, 2025 at 2:48 AM
Reposted by CaptainKinetic
Every Copy of Wii Fit is In Stock Everywhere & at All Times via Any Used Game Store.
December 26, 2025 at 11:55 PM
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Cat Clinging To Side Of Christmas Tree Admits That Was Extent Of Plan https://theonion.com/cat-clinging-to-side-of-christmas-tree-admits-that-was-1849899567/
December 26, 2025 at 3:00 PM
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what Santa does when you’re on the naughty list (Real)
December 25, 2025 at 12:41 AM
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Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays.
December 25, 2025 at 1:26 AM
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December 24, 2025 at 12:31 PM
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every wiki article about classic UK comedy like "Father and Sons was a comedy duo comprised of Reg Father and Tommy Sons, who appeared on a record breaking 18,450 episodes of The Light Applause Hour. Reg Father died in 1988 of Cigarette Fever. Tommy Sons remains alive in prison since 1997"
February 17, 2025 at 2:08 PM
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December 22, 2025 at 3:25 PM
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When I see an ad boasting of all that A.I. can create for me
December 13, 2025 at 4:12 AM
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December 8, 2025 at 9:40 PM
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orson welles, alive for another 30 years: do i regret my role in mad dog mccree? yes, of course... less for the blow to my ego and more for the sheer endurance of inanity while on set. a carnival shooting gallery on video? fine. but the madness of watching a man infinitely throwing a bottle...
December 7, 2025 at 12:53 PM
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Tapping the sign (@boocanan.bsky.social)
December 5, 2025 at 8:10 PM