🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
@guardsmanjones.bsky.social
23. Line cook by day, degen shitposter by night. Aspiring Bushido Lib. Mostly politics but I sometimes be feelin' my freak.
Pinned
Up guardsing my Jones. And by 'guardsing', well, lets justr say. jonesing my peanits.
I feel like "Mr Beast reinvents a torture from Abu Ghraib" is a pretty solid bet for the upcoming year
December 8, 2025 at 10:04 PM
I feel like "Mr Beast reinvents a torture from Abu Ghraib" is a pretty solid bet for the upcoming year
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
To-morrow, in the natural sun, the skies will be bright
December 8, 2025 at 9:47 PM
To-morrow, in the natural sun, the skies will be bright
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
Mein Führer…Steiner…
Brooke Rollins: "Eggs are down. Really everything is coming down. But listen, we're not tone deaf. We know that a lot of Americans are like, 'Well, we're still not feeling the relief.' The relief is coming ... it really is a golden age just right around the corner."
December 8, 2025 at 9:44 PM
Mein Führer…Steiner…
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
“Instead of being able to build a strike package that can penetrate an air defense network and hit a HVT we should fire 100 Shahed copies at them!”
But why. Why would we do that.
But why. Why would we do that.
December 8, 2025 at 1:10 PM
“Instead of being able to build a strike package that can penetrate an air defense network and hit a HVT we should fire 100 Shahed copies at them!”
But why. Why would we do that.
But why. Why would we do that.
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
Prints are available. Everything currently 50% off on Redbubble, apparently.
You would also be helping to recompense the Temu theft since I can't do anything about it (I can't even get the relevant page to load, perhaps owing to some regional restrictions). 🥲
www.redbubble.com/shop/ap/5918...
You would also be helping to recompense the Temu theft since I can't do anything about it (I can't even get the relevant page to load, perhaps owing to some regional restrictions). 🥲
www.redbubble.com/shop/ap/5918...
Pudgy Horse Lascaux Tribute 1 by Himmapaan | Redbubble
A #PudgyHorse tribute to the Lascaux cave paintings, painted with the Strata Trio Natural Formation watercolours, handmade from Cretaceous rocks by Mary Sanche.
www.redbubble.com
December 5, 2025 at 1:16 AM
Prints are available. Everything currently 50% off on Redbubble, apparently.
You would also be helping to recompense the Temu theft since I can't do anything about it (I can't even get the relevant page to load, perhaps owing to some regional restrictions). 🥲
www.redbubble.com/shop/ap/5918...
You would also be helping to recompense the Temu theft since I can't do anything about it (I can't even get the relevant page to load, perhaps owing to some regional restrictions). 🥲
www.redbubble.com/shop/ap/5918...
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
4) That orgs as unhinged as Code Pink and PSL are so visible in street-level organizing should prompt feelings of embarrassment and reflection on the part of the Democratic Party
December 4, 2025 at 5:14 PM
4) That orgs as unhinged as Code Pink and PSL are so visible in street-level organizing should prompt feelings of embarrassment and reflection on the part of the Democratic Party
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
What I want to say would (rightly) get me banned, so I'm just going to say that Megyn Kelly isn't seeing the pearly fuckin' gates.
Megyn Kelly on alleged war crimes: "I really do kind of not only wanna see them killed in the water, whether they're on the boat or in the water, but I'd really like to see them suffer. I would like Trump and Hegseth to make it last a long time so they lose a limb and bleed out."
December 2, 2025 at 2:30 PM
What I want to say would (rightly) get me banned, so I'm just going to say that Megyn Kelly isn't seeing the pearly fuckin' gates.
Throwing It Back Inside The Torment Nexus, and other short stories
December 2, 2025 at 9:40 AM
Throwing It Back Inside The Torment Nexus, and other short stories
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
If you're wondering how things are going on twitter, right wing grifters have taken over the Pentagon press offices from CNN, MSNBC, WaPo, etc. and are celebrating. Yes that is Cam Higby and Laura Loomer
December 2, 2025 at 9:02 AM
If you're wondering how things are going on twitter, right wing grifters have taken over the Pentagon press offices from CNN, MSNBC, WaPo, etc. and are celebrating. Yes that is Cam Higby and Laura Loomer
After a mere hour of being forced to listen to whatever brainrot is at the forefront of the average airport goers for you page, I have determined that we are doomed as a species and a nuclear holocaust is too kind a fate
December 2, 2025 at 9:29 AM
After a mere hour of being forced to listen to whatever brainrot is at the forefront of the average airport goers for you page, I have determined that we are doomed as a species and a nuclear holocaust is too kind a fate
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
Hideo Kojima has been cast as Paul Moldebrandt in the Japanese version of 'Zootopia 2'
It's his first voice acting role in an animated film
(via Famitsu)
It's his first voice acting role in an animated film
(via Famitsu)
December 2, 2025 at 9:02 AM
Hideo Kojima has been cast as Paul Moldebrandt in the Japanese version of 'Zootopia 2'
It's his first voice acting role in an animated film
(via Famitsu)
It's his first voice acting role in an animated film
(via Famitsu)
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
Fellas, is it meaty to drunk drive?
December 2, 2025 at 4:25 AM
Fellas, is it meaty to drunk drive?
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
Normally the creators of beloved children’s cartoon characters would not need to disavow the U.S. Secretary of Defense, but ours is a drunken miscreant, a loutish boor with the dignity and nobility of a counterfeit butt-plug
December 2, 2025 at 3:48 AM
Normally the creators of beloved children’s cartoon characters would not need to disavow the U.S. Secretary of Defense, but ours is a drunken miscreant, a loutish boor with the dignity and nobility of a counterfeit butt-plug
Beatin' hard or hardly beatin'?
December 1, 2025 at 12:00 AM
Beatin' hard or hardly beatin'?
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
This is all true but
1) under no definition are we currently at war with Venezuela under domestic US law
2) since we aren’t, the initial strike was just as much a murder as the follow up
The failure to understand this by a huge range of actors is really driving me up the wall.
1) under no definition are we currently at war with Venezuela under domestic US law
2) since we aren’t, the initial strike was just as much a murder as the follow up
The failure to understand this by a huge range of actors is really driving me up the wall.
If the Venezuelan sailors were enemy combatants, then the 2nd strike is a war crime.
If the Venezuelan sailors weren’t enemy combatants, then both strikes are criminal murder.
It’s that simple.
If the Venezuelan sailors weren’t enemy combatants, then both strikes are criminal murder.
It’s that simple.
November 30, 2025 at 11:07 PM
This is all true but
1) under no definition are we currently at war with Venezuela under domestic US law
2) since we aren’t, the initial strike was just as much a murder as the follow up
The failure to understand this by a huge range of actors is really driving me up the wall.
1) under no definition are we currently at war with Venezuela under domestic US law
2) since we aren’t, the initial strike was just as much a murder as the follow up
The failure to understand this by a huge range of actors is really driving me up the wall.
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
November 30, 2025 at 1:45 AM
Regardless of anything else that dap up at the end was smooth as fuck
Soon small businesses won’t have to wait for Small Business Saturday to get attention from their Mayor.
Some changes that they can look forward to:
Some changes that they can look forward to:
November 29, 2025 at 11:06 PM
Regardless of anything else that dap up at the end was smooth as fuck
I've refused to read that terrible essay we've been passing around all day but I can feel its relentless pull like gravity
November 29, 2025 at 7:52 PM
I've refused to read that terrible essay we've been passing around all day but I can feel its relentless pull like gravity
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
The baseline structure of the US constitution can survive many things. What it cannot survive is the speaker of the house being an omega male who is completely submissive to the president and willing to surrender all of his power. Mike Johnson is genuinely groundbreaking in this regard.
November 28, 2025 at 11:56 PM
The baseline structure of the US constitution can survive many things. What it cannot survive is the speaker of the house being an omega male who is completely submissive to the president and willing to surrender all of his power. Mike Johnson is genuinely groundbreaking in this regard.
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
“The strikes are so above board that we shitcanned the SOUTHCOM JAG lawyer for raising concerns!”
a lot of words, none of them denying that Hegseth gave an order to kill helpless people who were stranded at sea after he blew up their boats
November 29, 2025 at 1:44 AM
“The strikes are so above board that we shitcanned the SOUTHCOM JAG lawyer for raising concerns!”
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
No one will stop me from defending our freedoms.
November 29, 2025 at 1:02 AM
No one will stop me from defending our freedoms.
Reposted by 🎄 GuardsmanJones ♨️
China’s wolf warrior diplomats look like a bunch of pansies in comparison
Taiwanese ambassador to Finland performs with his metal band at Taiwan-Finland cultural event! 🤘✊️
That's what I call great ambassador
That's what I call great ambassador
November 29, 2025 at 1:32 AM
China’s wolf warrior diplomats look like a bunch of pansies in comparison