@motivationalbeaker.bsky.social
Reposted
jack daniels can be classified as either bourbon or whiskey, since bourbon and whiskey are simply different names for identical products
January 14, 2026 at 1:00 AM
jack daniels can be classified as either bourbon or whiskey, since bourbon and whiskey are simply different names for identical products
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If you are the gentleman who was driving down the 101 today on a 3-wheel motorcycle with a little dog in the back who was wearing doggles and had his ears flapping in the wind please know you changed my entire week and possibly my life 🫡
January 11, 2026 at 9:38 PM
If you are the gentleman who was driving down the 101 today on a 3-wheel motorcycle with a little dog in the back who was wearing doggles and had his ears flapping in the wind please know you changed my entire week and possibly my life 🫡
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[horse meeting]
We're getting a lot of good feedbag
We're getting a lot of good feedbag
January 11, 2026 at 4:17 PM
[horse meeting]
We're getting a lot of good feedbag
We're getting a lot of good feedbag
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We all know and love the airport as the place we go to cough on each other. But if you purchase a ticket you can also use it to get to other cities
January 10, 2026 at 3:41 PM
We all know and love the airport as the place we go to cough on each other. But if you purchase a ticket you can also use it to get to other cities
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do you guys hear that bell tolling? wonder who it’s for. it’s so loud lmao
January 10, 2026 at 3:30 PM
do you guys hear that bell tolling? wonder who it’s for. it’s so loud lmao
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BIG FIGHT AT POLAND’S WROCLAW ZOO!!!
January 9, 2026 at 8:02 PM
BIG FIGHT AT POLAND’S WROCLAW ZOO!!!
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curt cignetti having a flux capacitor moment where he unfolds a piece of paper and reveals what he wrote down when he discovered the secret of college football and it's "i would simply defeat all my opponents"
January 10, 2026 at 3:37 AM
curt cignetti having a flux capacitor moment where he unfolds a piece of paper and reveals what he wrote down when he discovered the secret of college football and it's "i would simply defeat all my opponents"
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CNN graphics put the asterisk in the wrong place, it appears…
January 8, 2026 at 2:24 AM
CNN graphics put the asterisk in the wrong place, it appears…
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The highlight of my holiday break? Uh, probably sitting around with my father-in-law, watching the college football playoffs and going through the entire NFL and naming which college every quarterback went to, you?
January 7, 2026 at 5:49 AM
The highlight of my holiday break? Uh, probably sitting around with my father-in-law, watching the college football playoffs and going through the entire NFL and naming which college every quarterback went to, you?
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A touching tribute to Mike F
![Classic Mike F tweet:
Check this shit out motherfucker [I slide one foot out from under me and fall on my ass, its not clear what kind of move I was trying to do]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:g62tajye723r3fa4gqw7l7ql/bafkreiacssf7vnpkyqovhna4mfme3qexnhqifch625ta46ibfzgpswz6ue@jpeg)
January 7, 2026 at 2:40 AM
A touching tribute to Mike F
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The phone is for making posts like "the ass is the father of the legs" whereas the computer is for posts that include words like "inexorably"
January 6, 2026 at 5:02 PM
The phone is for making posts like "the ass is the father of the legs" whereas the computer is for posts that include words like "inexorably"
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A thing I heard on the plane earlier: a man with an Australian accent saying "Sprite, with ice."
January 5, 2026 at 8:16 AM
A thing I heard on the plane earlier: a man with an Australian accent saying "Sprite, with ice."
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The Colts running a fake punt on FIRST DOWN after converting a fake punt from their own 20 is absolutely diabolical week 18 coaching. Kept their special teams unit on and ran a direct snap run. Caught the Texans with too many men on the field
January 4, 2026 at 6:44 PM
The Colts running a fake punt on FIRST DOWN after converting a fake punt from their own 20 is absolutely diabolical week 18 coaching. Kept their special teams unit on and ran a direct snap run. Caught the Texans with too many men on the field
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I'm the #3 personal injury attorney in the city, and I'm the ONLY one who will show up to court shirtless for YOU
January 4, 2026 at 2:28 PM
I'm the #3 personal injury attorney in the city, and I'm the ONLY one who will show up to court shirtless for YOU
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EVERYONE: Damn the ACC has some dumb tiebreakers
THE NFC SOUTH: (giggling uncontrollably and throwing lit fireworks at each other)
THE NFC SOUTH: (giggling uncontrollably and throwing lit fireworks at each other)
January 4, 2026 at 12:25 AM
EVERYONE: Damn the ACC has some dumb tiebreakers
THE NFC SOUTH: (giggling uncontrollably and throwing lit fireworks at each other)
THE NFC SOUTH: (giggling uncontrollably and throwing lit fireworks at each other)
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one of my favorite things to do is move one or two pieces of furniture maybe like 3 feet and then say it “opens up all kinds of possibilities”
January 2, 2026 at 6:38 PM
one of my favorite things to do is move one or two pieces of furniture maybe like 3 feet and then say it “opens up all kinds of possibilities”
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sometimes I’ll make a joke to my wife and she’ll roll her eyes and ask if I’m “gonna post that one on bluesky.” I mean, yes, but her tone is very hurtful
January 2, 2026 at 3:00 AM
sometimes I’ll make a joke to my wife and she’ll roll her eyes and ask if I’m “gonna post that one on bluesky.” I mean, yes, but her tone is very hurtful
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DAY 1 OF SPRING PRACTICE UNDER CHIP KELLY
KELLY: Now listen up you're going to throw the football
(team starts murmuring in confusion)
BRAUN: Wait a minute, hear him out, give him a chance
KELLY: To a wide receiver
(team starts yelling, you can hear players yell "you're allowed to do that?")
KELLY: Now listen up you're going to throw the football
(team starts murmuring in confusion)
BRAUN: Wait a minute, hear him out, give him a chance
KELLY: To a wide receiver
(team starts yelling, you can hear players yell "you're allowed to do that?")
December 30, 2025 at 3:07 PM
DAY 1 OF SPRING PRACTICE UNDER CHIP KELLY
KELLY: Now listen up you're going to throw the football
(team starts murmuring in confusion)
BRAUN: Wait a minute, hear him out, give him a chance
KELLY: To a wide receiver
(team starts yelling, you can hear players yell "you're allowed to do that?")
KELLY: Now listen up you're going to throw the football
(team starts murmuring in confusion)
BRAUN: Wait a minute, hear him out, give him a chance
KELLY: To a wide receiver
(team starts yelling, you can hear players yell "you're allowed to do that?")
Reposted
ME: (first day practicing Bug Law) May it please the Court—
BUG JUDGE: (sternly) Bug Court.
BUG JUDGE: (sternly) Bug Court.
December 30, 2025 at 6:29 PM
ME: (first day practicing Bug Law) May it please the Court—
BUG JUDGE: (sternly) Bug Court.
BUG JUDGE: (sternly) Bug Court.
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I would never do the "Here comes the airplane" bit to feed my child. Embarrassing for us both. I would calmly explain the importance of adequate nutrition and they will yield to unimpeachable logic
December 30, 2025 at 10:31 PM
I would never do the "Here comes the airplane" bit to feed my child. Embarrassing for us both. I would calmly explain the importance of adequate nutrition and they will yield to unimpeachable logic
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Hate freeloaders who join in the New Year's Eve countdown for the last 10 seconds. I've been doing this all year. Where were you back in May
December 30, 2025 at 11:32 AM
Hate freeloaders who join in the New Year's Eve countdown for the last 10 seconds. I've been doing this all year. Where were you back in May
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The Second-Order Streisand Effect is a social phenomenon where if a party makes an effort to censor information, discussion and news about the censorship paradoxically leads to an increased awareness of Barbara Streisand, a musician whom most "Zoomers" would probably have otherwise never heard of
December 29, 2025 at 7:27 PM
The Second-Order Streisand Effect is a social phenomenon where if a party makes an effort to censor information, discussion and news about the censorship paradoxically leads to an increased awareness of Barbara Streisand, a musician whom most "Zoomers" would probably have otherwise never heard of