Sarah Armento
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nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social
Sarah Armento
@nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social
journalist/writer/horror enthusiast. guitar player. robot from 1984. portland.

Short story “A Special Report” up now at Andromeda Magazine: https://andromedamagazine.com/2024/11/01/a-special-report/
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Link in bio 🌙
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oh, cool. anyone want to discuss the "giant flaw and weak sauce" in Pulp Fiction?
December 2, 2025 at 10:03 PM
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Current hobbies include screaming into a pillow and going outside at night to beg the aliens to take me
September 29, 2025 at 7:04 PM
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AHHHHHHHHHHH
December 2, 2025 at 5:33 AM
The Sunday scaries after a 4-day weekend hit extra hard
December 1, 2025 at 10:57 AM
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November 26, 2025 at 3:57 AM
I'm sure Return to Silent Hill will suck as much as the other two movies and also I fully plan to see it in the theater the week it comes out
November 26, 2025 at 12:41 AM
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I'm researching the silent 1914 Wizard of Oz films and one of them has a Minecraft cat
November 25, 2025 at 3:02 PM
Not a movie but I would order at least three more seasons of Channel Zero
If you were a despotic president, what movie would you force Hollywood to make? I want to see Quentin's Star Trek movie or maybe Kill Bill Vol 3.
November 25, 2025 at 11:05 PM
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I saw some horrible copy on a Chili's menu tonight:

HUNGRY? Get ready not to be
November 25, 2025 at 4:59 AM
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Man is the warmest place to hide, Charlie Brown
Every dead body that is not exterminated gets up and KILLS. The people it kills GET UP AND KILL, Charlie Brown.
November 25, 2025 at 1:09 AM
I love Mike Flanagan but wow do I hate this
Fresh off of #JurassicWorldRebirth, Scarlett Johansson has lined up her next franchise: She'll star in a new #Exorcist movie for writer/director Mike Flanagan.

Read more: https://bit.ly/4il17qW

📸 Tiffany Rose/Getty Images for Newport Beach Film Festival/Warner Bros.
November 24, 2025 at 10:58 PM
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if elon just hired an Inverse Jester (guy hired to listen to his jokes and pretend they're funny) we could solve every problem except how to keep the inverse jester from killing himself
November 24, 2025 at 4:42 PM
A single glass of rosé gave me the worst migraine of my life last night, so now I’m wondering if I should just avoid alcohol altogether. I only really drink socially so it wouldn’t be a huge lifestyle change, but for a shy weirdo like me that social lubricant really helps at parties and dates.
November 23, 2025 at 9:10 PM
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Hendrix was a huge SF nerd - I know this because I once commissioned a feature called Jimi Hendrix’s Five Favourite Science Fiction novels - so I’m in no doubt as to who is the biggest fan here.
If this doesn’t brighten up your feed just a bit then I don’t know what.
November 22, 2025 at 10:55 AM
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imagine walking down the beach and seeing jesus carrying some guy
November 22, 2025 at 1:04 AM
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YOU’RE ALL ASKING A LOT OF QUESTIONS ALREADY ANSWERED BY THE STATEMENT
Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
November 20, 2025 at 11:36 PM
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I lost a job for calling Charlie Kirk a Nazi, but this is cool.
Trump suggests Khashoggi had it coming: "You're mentioning someone that was extremely controversial. A lot of people didn't like that gentleman that you're talking about. Whether you like him or didn't like him, things happen. But he knew nothing about it. You don't have to embarrass our guest."
November 18, 2025 at 6:32 PM
My head is killing me but I'm reasonably confident I can make it through the workday without puking, so wish me luck! 🙃
November 18, 2025 at 1:32 AM
I have too many emotions and need them to go away but drinking gives me headaches
November 15, 2025 at 7:23 AM
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Buckle up. The crowd that brought you "Fifteen is too young to transition" and "Fifteen is too young to terminate a rape baby" is about to bring you "Well, now, actually, fifteen year olds, historically, were married with children by now, so you know, it's not really pedophilia..."

(Some were 13.)
in case you're wondering how the cope is going www.mediamatters.org/megyn-kelly/...
November 13, 2025 at 4:24 AM
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November 11, 2025 at 2:56 AM
*snorts a rail of coke*

Remake of Salò, set at Mar-A-Lago, called Mar-A-Salò, has this been pitched yet
November 10, 2025 at 3:49 AM
I couldn’t remember what Randonautica was called so I googled “app that leads to dead bodies”
November 7, 2025 at 10:12 AM
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Right about now, the honk shoo brother
November 6, 2025 at 2:02 PM
A man of wealth and extremely bad taste
November 7, 2025 at 5:30 AM