Sailor Dog Handel
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sailordoghandel.bsky.social
Sailor Dog Handel
@sailordoghandel.bsky.social
Billboard-charting librettist. Day job: Chair of Dramatic Writing at Cranberry Muffin University

https://linktr.ee/handelnyc
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Fascinating! -> bucking a multi-decadal decline in Mainline Christian denomination membership, membership in 2 of the traditionally most left-leaning, Quaker and Unitarian, seem to now be increasing in the state of Maine.

These 2 were *never* big, but historically they were heavily influential.
December 22, 2025 at 4:07 PM
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we solved this shit back in 1998 !!! mewtwo nailed on right on the head !!
December 18, 2025 at 10:39 PM
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Getting roasted in the SEAL Team chat because I glanced back at an explosion instead of casually walking away
December 19, 2025 at 5:57 AM
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billionaire: i have 3 brains. in my skull
interviewer: incredible
December 20, 2025 at 4:33 AM
The Epstein cover-up continues. Let's keep up the pressure on Republicans until ALL the files are released. act.indivisible.org/sign/tell-yo...
The Epstein cover-up continues. Let's keep up the pressure on Republicans until ALL the files are released.
Trump, his GOP enablers, and the Pam Bondi-led DOJ still think that – if they stall long enough – voters will forget about Jeffrey Epstein's crimes and the role Donald Trump, and some Republican megad...
act.indivisible.org
December 20, 2025 at 6:07 PM
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One of the cool things about living in Ann Arbor is the sheer volume of mid-century American homes you encounter when you walk around
December 17, 2025 at 3:50 PM
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This is why we have been denied gay, Brooklyn spider-man
I did not know that Sony literally put in their licensing agreement with Marvel for Spider-Man that Peter Parker had to be “heterosexual, Caucasian, and raised in Queens.”
December 17, 2025 at 7:10 PM
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December 18, 2025 at 5:16 AM
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They booked a bunch of 14 year old models to come to a Mar A Lago party, told them to dress sexy and tried to ply them with alcohol.
These are the people who are willing to go on the record.
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/18/u...
December 18, 2025 at 5:58 PM
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David Brooks, who wrote in the NYT last month, "The Epstein Story? Count Me Out" is... in the latest Epstein photo dump published by @oversightdemocrats.house.gov.

He should absolutely be fired by NYT for this. Major conflict of interest that he didn't disclose.
December 18, 2025 at 5:35 PM
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You’ve lost the plot as a presidential administration when Dr. Oz is on stage handwringing about the cost of balls
Dr Oz: "The creation of a penis costs on average in America $150,000 per child ... if you add testicles, that's extra"
December 18, 2025 at 5:06 PM
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it was probably a mistake teaching him to read
December 18, 2025 at 2:21 PM
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Of all the guys who left their wives for a half-their-age research assistant it's always *the one you least suspect* who turns up in the files about famous powerful men who palled around with the rapist and trafficker of young girls. Ain't that just the way.
December 18, 2025 at 6:16 PM
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“Is Antifa in the room with us right now?”
GLASHEEN: Antifa is our primary concern right now. That's the most immediate violent threat we're facing

BENNIE THOMPSON: Where is antifa headquartered?

GLASHEEN: ... ... ... we are building out the infrastructure right now

THOMPSON: What does that mean?
December 11, 2025 at 4:29 PM
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Aaron Rupar is proof that some of the best journalists *are* stenographers. The simple act of recording and publishing the words that they themselves utter - especially when they are as risible as Noem's - is profoundly important.
MAGAZINER: How many veterans have you deported?

NOEM: We haven't deported veterans

MAGAZINER: We are now joined on Zoom by a combat veteran you deported to Korea
December 11, 2025 at 4:44 PM
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I can’t get over how Barbie succeeded because it offered tangible ways for women and girls to celebrate each other (and dress up and go to the movies together) but studios thought it worked because it’s about toys so now they’re making like Bananagrams the movie
December 6, 2025 at 3:27 PM
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the crossbow has to be one of the most “hey give me a second here” weapons of all time
December 7, 2025 at 3:58 AM
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“I brought this horrid creature into the world, and now I must take him out!” Winfrey said
Oprah Pursues Dr. Phil On Ship Through Arctic
THE ARCTIC CIRCLE—With a vow to destroy the abomination she had created if it was the last thing she ever did, television host Oprah Winfrey has spent weeks on a ship pursuing Dr. Phil through the Arc...
theonion.com
December 9, 2025 at 12:30 AM
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Sir this is a combination KFC/Taco Bell
RFK Jr: "All of the ingenuity of corporate America has not produced an infant formula that is superior in nutrition and all the qualities that we want to the infant formula that God made, which is the infant formula in a mother's breast."
December 8, 2025 at 10:24 PM
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If I ever became a criminal, I would simply not write lists of my crimes
December 7, 2025 at 2:43 PM
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I love them

They would eat me but it’s fine because they’re endangered <3
i like seeing how polar bears keep their cubs warm
November 16, 2025 at 4:47 AM
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*youth pastor voice*

Let me tell you kids about another carpenter who wasn’t very popular with the authorities
Sabrina Carpenter made the White House delete their fuck ass tweet.
December 5, 2025 at 9:10 PM
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"Surely it doesn't need to be said that Paul Dano is one of our greatest actors. Anyone who doesn't get that doesn't know what acting is. He's also a brilliant director and writer, a very snappy dresser, and a gigantic mensch." --Tony Kushner
December 5, 2025 at 4:09 AM
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My great-uncle was born in the Russian Empire and wrote God Bless America
Rep. Kat Cammarck: "Today, one in six people in the US is foreign born. That quite frankly is not sustainable to maintain a culture that we are known for here in the United States."
December 2, 2025 at 5:18 PM