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Matt HalloweenName

@badthoughthaver.bsky.social

3K followers 510 following 11K posts

Nerd, geek, dork, loser. Please help: My thoughts, they are bad. Said thoughts: bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaaolkthurmh6 Pfp by @geraldinepiche.bsky.social HIRE THEM NOW

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Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · Oct 30

My personality? Imagine if Marvin the Paranoid Android and Eeyore fucked.

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Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 22m

😘

Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 22m

🥰

Reposted by Matt HalloweenName

GᵣₐbₜₕₑWₑₙₑₛₛ @ayankdownunder.bsky.social · 1d

My crowning achievement was when I first entered this world during my vaginal birth.

Haven't crowned since.

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born miserable @bornmiserable.bsky.social · 1h

19TH CENTURY ENGLISH PROVERB: may you live in interesting times
ME, IN 2025: first of all, fuck you

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Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 53m

"Ow! My chromosomes!"

Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 1h

😍 I love you Dear Leader!

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Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 1h

Every second I spend awake is spent against my will.

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🎃punkin spice spooky geist💀 @pretty-vulgar.bsky.social · 2h

‘president of peace?’

More like president of piece of shit.

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Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 1h

Awesome! Can a person get high on catnip? Might spend my time in the cult experimenting to find out.

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Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 2h

I only said you don't *have* to…

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Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 2h

Thank fuck for that. I'm bringing cats though.

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Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 2h

Do I get to leave my job and all my worldly possessions behind?

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Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 3h

If anybody was thinking of kidnapping me and handcuffing me to a radiator in their basement now would be a great time. You don't even have to use me as a sex slave.

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RXSarsparilla🎉 @gypsymoon1969.bsky.social · 9h

oh yeah well could AI do THIS *gets trapped in sports bra*

Boo-greenia 👻 @eugreenia.bsky.social · 10h

oh yeah well could AI do THIS
*hiccups and burps at the same time *

Chicken the Friendly Ghost 👻 @vermontchicken.bsky.social · 10h

oh yeah well could AI do THIS
*dribbles water down the front of their shirt*

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Damnit Janet @damnitjanet.bsky.social · 8h

Yeah, i'm still punk

*uses shower gel in the bath*

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Kara @kgz3.bsky.social · 8h

People who don’t talk to their pets miss out on the opportunity to say things like “That’s some fucking good crunchy paper! Right, my man?”

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Pot Shop Boo @potshopboy.bsky.social · 7h

You better check center yourself before you rec center yourself.

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Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 3h

I swear every time I learn something new about Cracker Barrel I understand what it's supposed to be less.

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alexis simpson @amutepiggy.bsky.social · 6h

antqueefa

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Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 3h

Who's still here and awake then? Anybody?

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Forrest Plump @nahyoudoit.bsky.social · 16h

A shock collar but for the urge to check somebody’s page

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𐓄𐒰𐓍𐒷 Heathen @motherofbeanz.bsky.social · 5h

*forgets I can’t mute specific words on the tv*

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Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 3h

Turns out there's even less chance of me thinking of something funny or interesting to say at this time of the morning when I'm sleep deprived. Go figure.

Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 3h

😳🔥

Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 4h

Yes thank you brain, 4am is definitely the time I wanted to wake up for no reason whatsoever. Maybe we could go back to sleep now that it's 5:30? Maybe? Hello?

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