Cru
@carnitas.bsky.social
Chaotic Sleepy
America’s Weird Neighbor
📍a bog perhaps
America’s Weird Neighbor
📍a bog perhaps
Pinned
doing my stevie nicks goat voice until you impregnate or murder me
January 11, 2026 at 5:34 PM
doing my stevie nicks goat voice until you impregnate or murder me
online dating, summarized
January 11, 2026 at 5:31 PM
online dating, summarized
I’m absolutely fine if the Macklemore joke doesn’t take off, just saying
January 11, 2026 at 5:11 PM
I’m absolutely fine if the Macklemore joke doesn’t take off, just saying
walk up in the club like
“what up. i have made a grave mistake
i should not be here”
“what up. i have made a grave mistake
i should not be here”
January 11, 2026 at 5:10 PM
walk up in the club like
“what up. i have made a grave mistake
i should not be here”
“what up. i have made a grave mistake
i should not be here”
why are they so afraid of a 5 loko
January 11, 2026 at 4:32 PM
why are they so afraid of a 5 loko
like bitch i had to soak these babies, no Mormon, germinate then plant
January 11, 2026 at 4:32 PM
like bitch i had to soak these babies, no Mormon, germinate then plant
Reposted by Cru
"I don't know what's happening here"
Me, while:
-watching sports
-parallel parking
-trying something new in bed
Me, while:
-watching sports
-parallel parking
-trying something new in bed
January 11, 2026 at 3:14 PM
"I don't know what's happening here"
Me, while:
-watching sports
-parallel parking
-trying something new in bed
Me, while:
-watching sports
-parallel parking
-trying something new in bed
Reposted by Cru
Hey babe your Fuck Ice rally or mine?
January 11, 2026 at 3:30 PM
Hey babe your Fuck Ice rally or mine?
no i will not be putting a link to my good skeets in my profile, you wade through my carefully selected reposts or you hit the little dots button, i will not do the work for you
January 11, 2026 at 3:22 PM
no i will not be putting a link to my good skeets in my profile, you wade through my carefully selected reposts or you hit the little dots button, i will not do the work for you
gas station pill for less boners would probably help a lot
January 11, 2026 at 3:21 PM
gas station pill for less boners would probably help a lot
Reposted by Cru
i'd love to hear alternate definitions of secret police from "heavily armed masked officers that refuse to provide their name or badge number"
January 11, 2026 at 3:14 PM
i'd love to hear alternate definitions of secret police from "heavily armed masked officers that refuse to provide their name or badge number"
i do not match energy. you can be angry all you want. that’s not my anger. that’s all you, boo. 🥰
January 11, 2026 at 3:13 PM
i do not match energy. you can be angry all you want. that’s not my anger. that’s all you, boo. 🥰
Reposted by Cru
Reposted by Cru
Crying isn't cathartic when it's relentless.
January 11, 2026 at 12:49 PM
Crying isn't cathartic when it's relentless.
Reposted by Cru
More like mental hellth amirite lol
January 11, 2026 at 7:13 AM
More like mental hellth amirite lol
got two jacaranda seeds to sprout, cru for president
January 11, 2026 at 3:04 PM
got two jacaranda seeds to sprout, cru for president
Reposted by Cru
All the other scientists are yelling at me because I’m wearing the Doomsday Clock like Flavor Flav
December 12, 2024 at 3:36 PM
All the other scientists are yelling at me because I’m wearing the Doomsday Clock like Flavor Flav
Reposted by Cru
Your honor my client loves crime
January 6, 2026 at 4:29 PM
Your honor my client loves crime
Reposted by Cru
I’ll never bow to peer pressure. Unless you guys want me to?
January 10, 2026 at 5:00 PM
I’ll never bow to peer pressure. Unless you guys want me to?
Reposted by Cru
who ordered the sky cocaine
January 11, 2026 at 2:19 PM
who ordered the sky cocaine
Reposted by Cru
haha yeah babe i’m so spontaneous [combusts]
January 11, 2026 at 2:18 PM
haha yeah babe i’m so spontaneous [combusts]