Dan Cerinthedark
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etbeeegood.bsky.social
Dan Cerinthedark
@etbeeegood.bsky.social
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
"Why are you returning your item (candle)?"
November 27, 2025 at 3:44 AM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
older, wiser yoda:
“do or do not. i don’t give a fuck.”
November 26, 2025 at 8:55 PM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
getting mouthy
November 26, 2025 at 7:31 PM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Playing ZZ Top to my beard to encourage growth.
November 26, 2025 at 7:39 PM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
sometimes i wish i could stop talking when i'm in the middle of talking but i never can
November 26, 2025 at 7:59 PM
holy water? man, how tf does water get a hole in it
November 26, 2025 at 8:26 PM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
I can’t wait until archaeologists discover the Chuck Taylors I’ve ritualistically placed beneath the sill of my house
November 24, 2025 at 11:16 PM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Sometimes you have to talk to yourself out loud because your brain won't listen to your inside voice
November 24, 2025 at 12:03 AM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
there are no mistakes in cookie crust land
November 26, 2025 at 2:44 PM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Ran outta shortbread cookies for my lemon cream pie so I crushed some Italian sprinkle cookies & Stella D’oro Margherites & now I have a 3 cookie crust going & that doesn’t even sound like a mistake
November 26, 2025 at 2:42 PM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
if you use the green skinned potatoes it’s called Hulk Mash
November 26, 2025 at 5:19 PM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
the average crowd at an indie pop show
November 26, 2025 at 2:45 AM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Me..driving in the fog...This is not my town. How did I get here.
November 26, 2025 at 2:40 AM
🎵 smokin’ thru a croc hole

*bendy guitar riff
November 26, 2025 at 2:34 AM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
thinking about becoming the guy at the bar we all hate (asking strangers to name the song that’s currently playing)
November 26, 2025 at 12:44 AM
*explaining 3615 code Père Noël to my kids

Ok, it’s like a french Home Alone, which sounds great, but you need like a 1/2 bottle of wine first for it to be good
November 26, 2025 at 1:59 AM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
*pronounces tomatoes like comatose*
November 26, 2025 at 12:10 AM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Our surroundings have always listened in on us, their capitalism is the environment of a perfect moment. "Your surroundings have their hands up, you are too paranoid for the presence of psychic shopping"
November 25, 2025 at 5:12 PM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
the problem with being a “Swearer” is that when you’re REALLY mad, swears aren’t enough
November 26, 2025 at 12:18 AM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
November 18, 2025 at 12:52 AM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
You might think this is just a squirrel hunched over eating a nut but it might also be a horse with a short face and nose piercings or a horned person with a mohawk and a missing lower jaw
November 18, 2025 at 1:22 AM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Stop hating yourself for everything. Be specific.
November 10, 2023 at 3:52 AM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Can’t, I’m busy shocking the monkey
November 25, 2025 at 9:45 PM
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
d elightful
u nbothered
m arvelous
b eing

b asking
i n
t he
c oolness
h erein
November 25, 2025 at 11:06 PM