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Damnit Janet

@damnitjanet.bsky.social

15K followers 1.5K following 10K posts

In my napping era Scottish and Queer | she/her My shitshow: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:t3dajzevhocfddfzczceizlp/feed/aaaoojl75k4ve

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Damnit Janet @damnitjanet.bsky.social · Aug 30

Seriously man I just- I- I fucking KNEW you didn't have my nose

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Corduroy Cheddar @corduroycheddar.bsky.social · 5h

🎶 how deep is your state 🎶

Conspiricee Gees

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chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 6h

The only reason to fill your face with fillers is to ensure you have mayonnaise for later.

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Ennui Doofen @ennuidoofen.bsky.social · 6h

One great thing about having a chest wound is you can walk around with a real "what are ya gonna do to me, stab me in the chest?" attitude. I'm just here to remind you that one can have two chest wounds, so you may wanna say,"What are you gonna do to me, stab me in the chest TWICE?"

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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 5h

Your chances of being Bret Easton Ellis are low but never less than zero

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 8h

Sorry your boyfriend thinks foreplay is a football pregame show.

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chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 1d

If there is a pore, yo I'll unclog it
Check out this weird, sketchy blackhead hook I bought on Shein while my DJ revolves it

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chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 8h

We just keep letting Jared Leto happen for some reason.

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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 9h

Finally just going to do the account I've always wanted, recipes for dodos where you lick various spices and sauces off of them in a slow chasing style. I suppose it could work with current escargots

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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 12h

The handle came off the microwave so we're playing an old timey game of expecting a long distance call

My grandma's old black rotary phone with a long black microwave handle as the receiver

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Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 11h

“The cat is such a perfect symbol of beauty and superiority that it seems scarcely possible for any true aesthete and civilised cynic to do other than worship it.”

- H.P. Lovecraft

A hand holding a dripping wet, bulging-eyed, flat-faced cat looking sadly at the camera.

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Julie Lavender Menace @2tickytacky.bsky.social · 15h

In 1980, my mom invented the double bow for shoe tying and revolutionized babysitting.

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mean things I say to myself @meantomyself.bsky.social · 16h

Weird how they say that vaccines are bad and the president is good but the president got two vaccines yesterday, I wonder how long it will take before he is forced to wear high heels or starts collecting model trains or whatever they think vaccines do besides save lives

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gimme the spoo-K Special @gimmethekspecial.bsky.social · 16h

After saying “what” for the third time and still having no clue what they just said, is it okay to just crumple up in the fetal position until they go away?