Julie Lavender Menace
@2tickytacky.bsky.social
🔵Banger skeet writer
🔵Top 10 blood donor in Pannonica County
🔵Saving souls, one homeless orphan kitten at a time.
I'm not Lisa. My name is Julie 🏳️⚧️. she/her
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaabsfrnzo2wy
🔵Top 10 blood donor in Pannonica County
🔵Saving souls, one homeless orphan kitten at a time.
I'm not Lisa. My name is Julie 🏳️⚧️. she/her
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaabsfrnzo2wy
Pinned
Now, a message from Rev. Thurl H. "Skeet" Ravenscrof.
Vodka Shot Bingo 7p to floor. Vaseline 16 oz jar $4.99. Spatulas $2.99 each. Double Stuf Oreos $3.99. Sale ends Sunday. God bless.
Vodka Shot Bingo 7p to floor. Vaseline 16 oz jar $4.99. Spatulas $2.99 each. Double Stuf Oreos $3.99. Sale ends Sunday. God bless.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
it's a peppermint tea morning
February 3, 2026 at 10:36 AM
it's a peppermint tea morning
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
wringing my phone out to get the last drops of sweet, sweet dopamine juice from it
February 3, 2026 at 10:53 PM
wringing my phone out to get the last drops of sweet, sweet dopamine juice from it
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
I forgot what I was saying mid-sentence just to be mysterious.
February 3, 2026 at 9:52 PM
I forgot what I was saying mid-sentence just to be mysterious.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
I know that it took me exactly 12 minutes to get to my last office job because I was determined to never give my employer even 5 seconds of my free time.
February 3, 2026 at 4:40 PM
I know that it took me exactly 12 minutes to get to my last office job because I was determined to never give my employer even 5 seconds of my free time.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
It’s their mess, they need to clean it up. Shovel and lime are in the garage. Remember 6ft, shallow graves are easy, but easy gets you caught.
February 3, 2026 at 4:14 PM
It’s their mess, they need to clean it up. Shovel and lime are in the garage. Remember 6ft, shallow graves are easy, but easy gets you caught.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
those bonds last forever. i hardly ever see my family anymore but when i do, i always ask how their appeals are going.
February 3, 2026 at 4:20 PM
those bonds last forever. i hardly ever see my family anymore but when i do, i always ask how their appeals are going.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
This is very on the nose for me
January 31, 2026 at 5:31 AM
This is very on the nose for me
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
Love hasn't died when you can't bear to look at someone's picture anymore; it's dead when you can.
January 31, 2026 at 7:20 PM
Love hasn't died when you can't bear to look at someone's picture anymore; it's dead when you can.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
Looking to find me someone who knows the difference between a double entendre and a double-ended dildo.
February 2, 2026 at 11:23 PM
Looking to find me someone who knows the difference between a double entendre and a double-ended dildo.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
I think a lot about Lois & Clark and how Lex Luthor wanted an X in all of his childrens names. Even in 1995, when I was just barely old enough to be called teenager, even then I rolled my eyes. Billionaires, fictional and real, are absolute caricatures of what mediocre men think power is
February 2, 2026 at 11:48 PM
I think a lot about Lois & Clark and how Lex Luthor wanted an X in all of his childrens names. Even in 1995, when I was just barely old enough to be called teenager, even then I rolled my eyes. Billionaires, fictional and real, are absolute caricatures of what mediocre men think power is
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
I bet it feels so good for the parking lot to be empty after being full all day
February 3, 2026 at 5:02 AM
I bet it feels so good for the parking lot to be empty after being full all day
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
Paying my chiropractor a little extra so they'll burp me before my adjustment
February 3, 2026 at 3:35 PM
Paying my chiropractor a little extra so they'll burp me before my adjustment
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
The day grows darker on the inside.
February 2, 2026 at 12:22 AM
The day grows darker on the inside.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
I learn a lot by accident.
January 31, 2026 at 5:42 AM
I learn a lot by accident.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
It’s a great day to be murdered by the state.
January 8, 2026 at 11:30 AM
It’s a great day to be murdered by the state.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
in the absence of electricity, water, and internet, we became very interested in birds
February 2, 2026 at 4:59 PM
in the absence of electricity, water, and internet, we became very interested in birds
Whenever my son tells me we need to hang out more, I know he's guilting me into helping him bury another body.
February 3, 2026 at 2:18 PM
Whenever my son tells me we need to hang out more, I know he's guilting me into helping him bury another body.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
This day in history. 2002. US president George W Bush described Iraq, Iran, and North Korea as an “axis of evil”. Also on this day George W Bush learned that Iraq and Iran are not the same country then forgot that immediately.
January 29, 2026 at 9:04 AM
This day in history. 2002. US president George W Bush described Iraq, Iran, and North Korea as an “axis of evil”. Also on this day George W Bush learned that Iraq and Iran are not the same country then forgot that immediately.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
This day in history. 1578. Battle of Gembloux. Spanish forces defeated an army of Dutch, Flemish, English, Scottish, German, French, Italian, Walloon, Luxembourgish, Swiss, Andorran, Sámi, Rohanese, Dornish, Atlantan, Wakandan, Cimmerian, Ishtari, Freedonian, Ruritanian, and even Florinish rebels.
January 31, 2026 at 9:25 AM
This day in history. 1578. Battle of Gembloux. Spanish forces defeated an army of Dutch, Flemish, English, Scottish, German, French, Italian, Walloon, Luxembourgish, Swiss, Andorran, Sámi, Rohanese, Dornish, Atlantan, Wakandan, Cimmerian, Ishtari, Freedonian, Ruritanian, and even Florinish rebels.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
This day in history. 1959. All nine members of a ski hiking expedition in the northern Ural Mountains were bizarrely struck dead by a force of nature. It could only have been Brigitte Bardot.
February 2, 2026 at 9:24 AM
This day in history. 1959. All nine members of a ski hiking expedition in the northern Ural Mountains were bizarrely struck dead by a force of nature. It could only have been Brigitte Bardot.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
When I was young and single, I used to buy all my snowstorm supplies at the local liquor store.
January 28, 2026 at 1:08 PM
When I was young and single, I used to buy all my snowstorm supplies at the local liquor store.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
One day I'll probably look up from my phone and realize my kids put me in a nursing home.
January 31, 2026 at 1:14 PM
One day I'll probably look up from my phone and realize my kids put me in a nursing home.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
Just looking . . . is acceptable at Macy's and JC Penny, but not the gym . . . I know this now.
February 2, 2026 at 1:23 PM
Just looking . . . is acceptable at Macy's and JC Penny, but not the gym . . . I know this now.
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
My tits only tingle for thee, my love
My wang only wags in earnest for you, my dear
I hope Hallmark takes my Valentine's Day card submissions seriously this year!
My wang only wags in earnest for you, my dear
I hope Hallmark takes my Valentine's Day card submissions seriously this year!
February 1, 2026 at 10:48 PM
My tits only tingle for thee, my love
My wang only wags in earnest for you, my dear
I hope Hallmark takes my Valentine's Day card submissions seriously this year!
My wang only wags in earnest for you, my dear
I hope Hallmark takes my Valentine's Day card submissions seriously this year!
Reposted by Julie Lavender Menace
If you look closely, you can see the Buddha disapproving of my half hearted attempt at an evening yoga session but he thinks my noodle cat jammies are cute, so he'll allow it.
February 2, 2026 at 12:49 AM
If you look closely, you can see the Buddha disapproving of my half hearted attempt at an evening yoga session but he thinks my noodle cat jammies are cute, so he'll allow it.