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@platero.bsky.social
140 followers 250 following 59 posts
standard-issue lousiana suburban dad he/him
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dinfontay.com
Dave Infante @dinfontay.com · 4h
can't believe outlets are running moral-panic headlines again based on flimsy anecdata from the *same* trade group (the national retailer federation) and sponsored by the *same* anti-theft company (sensormatic) that had to retract this *same* "study" just two years ago for being bogus.
Retailers Dealing With Increasing Levels of Theft and Violence
Report emphasizes importance of preventive measures, coordination with law enforcement
progressivegrocer.com
36 620 1.8K
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katewitko.bsky.social
kate @katewitko.bsky.social · 22h
guess what it's time to watch this 90 more times
4 64 280
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heythisisbrian.bsky.social
Boo! This is Brian @heythisisbrian.bsky.social · 20h
It’s his day.
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quantian.bsky.social
Quantian @quantian.bsky.social · 2d
Look at my nuclear startups dawg I am moving to fucking New Zealand to escape the fallout
8 29 160
platero.bsky.social @platero.bsky.social · 2d
unzip pants, pull underpants down and fish it out. best/worst of both worlds
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lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com
lauren @lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · 2d
the worst era for pop music was (UserProfile: BirthYear+13) to (UserProfile: BirthYear+21). that was total dogshit. everything else pretty much fine
35 89 900
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crtpixel.bsky.social
DOKI DOKI CRT PANIC @crtpixel.bsky.social · 4d
BEETHOVEN: THE ULTIMATE CANINE CAPER
RIEDEL SOFTWARE 1993
SNES
Beethoven the dog seconds before brutally attacking a cat. Just like the movie!
24 130
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porksweats.bsky.social
don't hug me I'm porksweats @porksweats.bsky.social · 4d
CHOTINER: So you asked for a Birkin bag?
KOKO: Yes. Possession Bag.
CHOTINER: And you had the funds to acquire this?
KOKO: No, Professor Purchase Koko Gorilla
CHOTINER: That doesn't sound like the funds were justifiable.
KOKO: Hostility Interviewer
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justinbaragona.bsky.social
Justin Baragona @justinbaragona.bsky.social · 3d
This was just posted by a CBS News producer on their Instagram stories.
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tweetpotato314.bsky.social
mr potato @tweetpotato314.bsky.social · Mar 20
my wife: we have to wear what we died in for eternity!?

st. peter: that’s right

me: [from the back end of our horse costume] what’d he say
7 740 3.4K
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manigarm.bsky.social
Dr. Holly Walters @manigarm.bsky.social · 3d
I don't think this requires further comment from me.
"Can I consecrate this for communion?" Bingo. Involving structure purists versus ingredient purists.
20 140 400
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mattround.com
Matt Round @mattround.com · 4d
I’m starting to notice a subtler effect where non-techie heavy LLM users are subtly anthropomorphising it as some kind of genius friend and get angry/defensive about any mention of limitations/problems (as if you’re insulting a close friend or admired colleague)
4 12 32
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gizmouse.bsky.social
rat posting from the lab @gizmouse.bsky.social · Sep 29
academy award contending tiktok
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kennylogins.bsky.social
Kenny Logins @kennylogins.bsky.social · Aug 8
dan mentos @danmentos.com Boston Market recently changed their name to Boston MARKET, a move that increased their market capitalization by 500% January 27, 2025 at 11:36 PM
1 32 190
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kennylogins.bsky.social
Kenny Logins @kennylogins.bsky.social · Sep 9
wargen @funeralpig.bsky.social me: ran into The Penis Smasher last night friend: oof did he uh? (claps hands together) me: big time June 10, 2025 at 8:35 PM
1 32 190
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kennylogins.bsky.social
Kenny Logins @kennylogins.bsky.social · 5d
Riley @raaleh.bsky.social IT GUY WHO POSTS ON GRUNTSTYLE FB: Valhalla awaits us brothers ACTUAL ARMY GRUNT: what's up TikTok it's your boy Jesse 27 today I'm doing the cinnamon challenge in my asshole ACTUAL SPECOPS GUY: (lying burned and dead in his car from a heroin deal gone wrong) September 13, 2025 at 6:01 AM
2 64 320
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caylen.bsky.social
caylen @caylen.bsky.social · 5d
there's a lot of reasons this is stupid, but if you're an engineering dork a fun little distraction this morning is thinking about how the elevator math would work for a 70,000 capacity stadium where your crowd load has to be resolved in an hour at most
caesarflunk.bsky.social Caesar Flunk @caesarflunk.bsky.social · 5d
This will 100% not be built.
29 8 140
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heathcliffhelms.heathcliff.cat
Heathcliff plus Helmets @heathcliffhelms.heathcliff.cat · 5d
The Heathstance

#heathoween
1 28 160
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parkermolloy.com
Parker Molloy @parkermolloy.com · 5d
Reminds me of this classic from a few years back:
Pragun Dua 3:08 PM GUYS IM STUCK IN THE WEWORK LIFT Custom response slackbot 3:08 PM Hi! 'Guys' is a gendered pronoun. We recommend alternatives like 'folks, 'all, 'everyone', 'y'all, 'team, 'crew' etc. We appreciate your help in building an inclusive workplace at Headout. Pragun Dua 3:09 PM FOLKS IM STUCK IN THE WEWORK
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platero.bsky.social @platero.bsky.social · 5d
Please do not cook the implant inside your bones mister falconry
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jeffasher.bsky.social
Jeff Asher @jeffasher.bsky.social · 5d
Fun times in New Orleans sports
1 1 8
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esqueer.net
Alejandra Caraballo @esqueer.net · 5d
The official USDA site is blaming trans people for SNAP benefits expiring.
“A screenshot of a webpage from fns.usda.gov showing a warning message in a brown box. The message claims Senate Democrats voted 12 times not to fund the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP), states there will be no benefits issued November 1, and accuses them of holding out for healthcare for illegal immigrants and gender-related procedures. The USDA Food and Nutrition Service logo appears at the bottom, along with a blue ‘Menu’ button.”
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bencollins.bsky.social
Tim Onion @bencollins.bsky.social · 7d
Live footage from the White House Ballroom
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proptermalone.bsky.social
post malone ergo propter malone @proptermalone.bsky.social · 7d
have reread the phrase “30-40+ inches of additional rain” several times now
weatherwest.bsky.social Daniel Swain @weatherwest.bsky.social · 7d
Jamaica, in particular, will likely suffer catastrophic impacts from now rapidly-intensifying (but slow-moving) Hurricane #Melissa. A *Category 5* landfall now appears to be the most likely outcome, & 30-40+ inches of *additional* rain in mountains will lead to extreme flooding.
Official graphic depicting potential rainfall from Melissa in the Carribbean from the National Hurricane Center. Over 30-40 inches may locally fall in the mountains of Jamaica. Note that additional rainfall may fall, beyond indicated here, outside of the 4 day window mentioned.
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reckless.bsky.social
nilay patel @reckless.bsky.social · 7d
He’s designing the ballroom with AI isn’t he www.nytimes.com/interactive/...
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