Schmrrrrrrrlex
@schmrrrlex.bsky.social
mouldering lump of organic matter trapped in a series of social media accounts with diminishing returns
Pinned
Schmrrrrrrrlex
@schmrrrlex.bsky.social
· Dec 28
schrödinger:
cat with a gun: I said get in the box
cat with a gun: I said get in the box
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
The Magic of Snow (2024)
Art Print: www.inprnt.com/gallery/ryot...
Art Print: www.inprnt.com/gallery/ryot...
December 18, 2025 at 6:31 AM
The Magic of Snow (2024)
Art Print: www.inprnt.com/gallery/ryot...
Art Print: www.inprnt.com/gallery/ryot...
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
Came back secondhand, born in thrift. It never could have all been brand new but some say there's an invoice somewhere. It would mean we're alive not just curses in old things. Me, I astral project to Etsy
February 9, 2026 at 5:43 AM
Came back secondhand, born in thrift. It never could have all been brand new but some say there's an invoice somewhere. It would mean we're alive not just curses in old things. Me, I astral project to Etsy
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
Let’s be honest: in many of these winter Olympic “sports”, the snow is doing most of the work. An unexpected thaw would expose these so-called athletes for the frauds they are
February 6, 2026 at 8:38 PM
Let’s be honest: in many of these winter Olympic “sports”, the snow is doing most of the work. An unexpected thaw would expose these so-called athletes for the frauds they are
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
Every Super Bowl ad is for the door in the forest. It’s annoying. “You must walk through the door.” Yeah thanks, I know that already. I dream of the door every night
February 9, 2026 at 12:38 AM
Every Super Bowl ad is for the door in the forest. It’s annoying. “You must walk through the door.” Yeah thanks, I know that already. I dream of the door every night
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
The clipboard is part of the ritual. Without it nothing will get checked off ritual paper with ritual pen during a step by step ritual consultation plus I never know what to do with my clipboardism practicing hand
February 7, 2026 at 5:40 AM
The clipboard is part of the ritual. Without it nothing will get checked off ritual paper with ritual pen during a step by step ritual consultation plus I never know what to do with my clipboardism practicing hand
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
Man I seen a seagull eat a duck once
February 7, 2026 at 1:46 PM
Man I seen a seagull eat a duck once
one of the most difficult things about getting older is it's a lot harder to catch lizards
February 7, 2026 at 10:03 AM
one of the most difficult things about getting older is it's a lot harder to catch lizards
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
Need a wrinkly bag for your thoughts? Try a brain™️.
February 6, 2026 at 1:21 PM
Need a wrinkly bag for your thoughts? Try a brain™️.
people joke about putting billionaires in guillotines but a trebuchet would be much funnier
February 5, 2026 at 9:01 PM
people joke about putting billionaires in guillotines but a trebuchet would be much funnier
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
me: did you finish inside me
surgeon: please stop saying it that way
surgeon: please stop saying it that way
September 1, 2023 at 7:27 PM
me: did you finish inside me
surgeon: please stop saying it that way
surgeon: please stop saying it that way
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
well well well look who it is, the lazy ass ferns that just laid browned and flaccid on the ground all winter wanna get all high and mighty now that its a little warmer outside. i wont forget your true nature now that youre standing erect you little shits
April 21, 2025 at 6:29 PM
well well well look who it is, the lazy ass ferns that just laid browned and flaccid on the ground all winter wanna get all high and mighty now that its a little warmer outside. i wont forget your true nature now that youre standing erect you little shits
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
After a lengthy appeals process and productive discussion with the Blue Sky safety team I will no loinger be sending George Thorogood lyrics to beautiful women on here via DM. Thank you all
February 4, 2026 at 5:02 PM
After a lengthy appeals process and productive discussion with the Blue Sky safety team I will no loinger be sending George Thorogood lyrics to beautiful women on here via DM. Thank you all
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
pulled pork = meat mulch
November 12, 2024 at 5:06 PM
pulled pork = meat mulch
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
me: so you can't actually swallow the cookies, you just mash them up? you must be starving
cookie monster: cookie is tragic figure, like hungry ghost of buddhist folklore
cookie monster: cookie is tragic figure, like hungry ghost of buddhist folklore
January 27, 2025 at 3:38 AM
me: so you can't actually swallow the cookies, you just mash them up? you must be starving
cookie monster: cookie is tragic figure, like hungry ghost of buddhist folklore
cookie monster: cookie is tragic figure, like hungry ghost of buddhist folklore
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
alien trying to fit in by starting a manosphere podcast: these hoes only want one thing... mineral-rich soil to take back to their dying planet
February 2, 2026 at 5:58 PM
alien trying to fit in by starting a manosphere podcast: these hoes only want one thing... mineral-rich soil to take back to their dying planet
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
relevant to many of yalls interests.
February 1, 2026 at 2:09 AM
relevant to many of yalls interests.
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
From: Jeffrey Epstein
To: Cain From The Bible
Date: March 7th, 3000BC
Subject: Re: Thinking of killing my brother? 👀👀
go for it it wouljld be extremlry sexy to invenf thr cornvept of murder snd yherefore curse mankind fur eternkity ;) ;)
To: Cain From The Bible
Date: March 7th, 3000BC
Subject: Re: Thinking of killing my brother? 👀👀
go for it it wouljld be extremlry sexy to invenf thr cornvept of murder snd yherefore curse mankind fur eternkity ;) ;)
January 31, 2026 at 2:18 PM
From: Jeffrey Epstein
To: Cain From The Bible
Date: March 7th, 3000BC
Subject: Re: Thinking of killing my brother? 👀👀
go for it it wouljld be extremlry sexy to invenf thr cornvept of murder snd yherefore curse mankind fur eternkity ;) ;)
To: Cain From The Bible
Date: March 7th, 3000BC
Subject: Re: Thinking of killing my brother? 👀👀
go for it it wouljld be extremlry sexy to invenf thr cornvept of murder snd yherefore curse mankind fur eternkity ;) ;)
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
sorry just found this in my spam folder r u guys still at the pedo island
January 31, 2026 at 6:39 PM
sorry just found this in my spam folder r u guys still at the pedo island
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
(living an unexamined life) yaaaaaay haha yay wheeeeee
December 4, 2025 at 1:44 AM
(living an unexamined life) yaaaaaay haha yay wheeeeee
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
Suspiciously asking my wife who's funding her anytime she criticizes me
January 17, 2026 at 6:10 PM
Suspiciously asking my wife who's funding her anytime she criticizes me
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
we're getting all the downsides of cyberpunk (social alienation, ruthless hyper capitalism, digital mass surveillance state) but none of the promised upsides (cheap street food, cool jackets, super drugs that make you really fast and strong before they kill you)
January 20, 2026 at 9:25 PM
we're getting all the downsides of cyberpunk (social alienation, ruthless hyper capitalism, digital mass surveillance state) but none of the promised upsides (cheap street food, cool jackets, super drugs that make you really fast and strong before they kill you)
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
Used the phrase “circle back” in an email today and now the dirt won’t wash off it won’t wash off no matter how much I scrub
January 28, 2026 at 12:42 AM
Used the phrase “circle back” in an email today and now the dirt won’t wash off it won’t wash off no matter how much I scrub
Keep the immigrants. Deport the fascists.
January 28, 2026 at 4:29 AM
Keep the immigrants. Deport the fascists.
Reposted by Schmrrrrrrrlex
ahh a nice night out at the movies. now time to check my phone and see what our mad pedophile king and his evil scheming viziers are up to
January 19, 2026 at 6:47 AM
ahh a nice night out at the movies. now time to check my phone and see what our mad pedophile king and his evil scheming viziers are up to