Englishman in New Jorts
@spanielapplause.bsky.social
Fitness freak | Security expert | Father to three or four wonderful young boys | Comedy writer/producer/man at Next Level Sketch | Improv with Michelle Impro
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
im sorry i know it sucks but journalists are going to have to be willing to get fired for simply describing what they see happening with their own eyes, you look like fucking morons
"Was the officer struck by the vehicle, as President Trump insists, or did the car pass by or around him?"
If we only had some trusted institution that could adjudicate between competing claims by relying on facts.
If we only had some trusted institution that could adjudicate between competing claims by relying on facts.
January 8, 2026 at 2:53 AM
im sorry i know it sucks but journalists are going to have to be willing to get fired for simply describing what they see happening with their own eyes, you look like fucking morons
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
For me, the depravity and criminality of the right isn't the thing I'm angriest about. For decades we were sidelined, cut out, insulted by the liberals who said we would impede them in preventing this. And now not only haven't they prevented it, they're incapable of acting against it.
One thing about all of this is: if the line is not here, at the mainstream, industrial-level creation of CSAM, where is it?
Musk by his own mission statement is out to smash societal norms, cut “empathy” from the West, demolish the EU…
What is next down the tracks for him, for X, if this isn’t it?
Musk by his own mission statement is out to smash societal norms, cut “empathy” from the West, demolish the EU…
What is next down the tracks for him, for X, if this isn’t it?
January 8, 2026 at 10:40 AM
For me, the depravity and criminality of the right isn't the thing I'm angriest about. For decades we were sidelined, cut out, insulted by the liberals who said we would impede them in preventing this. And now not only haven't they prevented it, they're incapable of acting against it.
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
This BBC drivel was parodied 44 years ago by Alexander Cockburn: harpers.org/archive/1982... It is - literally - beyond parody.
January 8, 2026 at 10:13 AM
This BBC drivel was parodied 44 years ago by Alexander Cockburn: harpers.org/archive/1982... It is - literally - beyond parody.
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
This shows the function of "independent" regulation. It is not to improve the working of an industry, but to allow the government to avoid responsibility.
Keir Starmer's spokesman tells me that X and Grok's creation of sexual deepfakes of children is "completely unacceptable" but again won't commit to taking direct action against them, or to stop posting there.
Says "all options are on the table" but suggests it's a matter for Ofcom, not Government
Says "all options are on the table" but suggests it's a matter for Ofcom, not Government
January 7, 2026 at 1:27 PM
This shows the function of "independent" regulation. It is not to improve the working of an industry, but to allow the government to avoid responsibility.
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
Helen lewis, the woman who thinks coffee is an american "middle class" (in the british sense) thing (it is also not a british middle class thing but people like helen believe coffee has yet to arrive to the further provinces of Leeds)
January 7, 2026 at 8:00 AM
Helen lewis, the woman who thinks coffee is an american "middle class" (in the british sense) thing (it is also not a british middle class thing but people like helen believe coffee has yet to arrive to the further provinces of Leeds)
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
[starmer at home, curtains drawn, riverdancing expressionlessly as the phone rings off the hook]
January 3, 2026 at 3:36 PM
[starmer at home, curtains drawn, riverdancing expressionlessly as the phone rings off the hook]
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
What would we usually call the type of person who would invite a fascist foreign power to attack their own country, install them in power and facilitate sales of national assets to the aggressor? Because that is what this is.
January 3, 2026 at 3:38 PM
What would we usually call the type of person who would invite a fascist foreign power to attack their own country, install them in power and facilitate sales of national assets to the aggressor? Because that is what this is.
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
He was way WAY quicker to condemn the people who threw some flour on fckn Stone Henge and its precious lichen. In fact, he was able to condemn them INSTANTLY.
‘Asked if he condemned the attacks, Starmer said he wanted to establish the facts and speak to Trump first’
That’s not diplomacy, that’s spineless capitulation
www.bbc.com/news/article...
That’s not diplomacy, that’s spineless capitulation
www.bbc.com/news/article...
Keir Starmer says UK 'not involved in any way' in US strike on Venezuela
The PM has not spoken to US President Donald Trump about the US seizure of President Nicolas Maduro.
www.bbc.com
January 3, 2026 at 2:51 PM
He was way WAY quicker to condemn the people who threw some flour on fckn Stone Henge and its precious lichen. In fact, he was able to condemn them INSTANTLY.
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
"Gentle reminder for the umpteenth time that Maduro is a 'brutal dictator', so after the US has installed Venezuelan Ahmed Chalabi and the country has descended into a fractured hellscape of militias and gangsterism as US oil companies extract the good stuff, know my heart was in the right place."
"I'm no fan of Maduro but..." why do people in the US feel a need to preface things this way in 20-fucking-26
January 3, 2026 at 12:08 PM
"Gentle reminder for the umpteenth time that Maduro is a 'brutal dictator', so after the US has installed Venezuelan Ahmed Chalabi and the country has descended into a fractured hellscape of militias and gangsterism as US oil companies extract the good stuff, know my heart was in the right place."
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
If anyone supports this on the grounds that Maduro sucks, they are endorsing an end to all attempts at a post-WWII international legal regime, no matter how flawed that system might be. Accepting this means endorsing pure unilateral might makes right.
January 3, 2026 at 9:42 AM
If anyone supports this on the grounds that Maduro sucks, they are endorsing an end to all attempts at a post-WWII international legal regime, no matter how flawed that system might be. Accepting this means endorsing pure unilateral might makes right.
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
"A woman dressed as a pink Power Ranger hacked a dating site for far-right extremists. She deleted the entire site, but first she made users fall in love with AI bots she ran, thus obtaining information about them. Over 8,000 far-right profiles have now been mapped."
En kvinna, utklädd till rosa Power Ranger, hackade datingsida för högerextrema. Hon raderade hela sidan, men först fick hon användarna att bli kära i AI-botar som hon drev och fick på så sätt ut information om dem. Över 8000 högerextrema profiler har nu kartlagts.
cybernews.com/security/inv...
cybernews.com/security/inv...
Investigator breaches white supremacist dating sites, exposes 8,000 users
An investigative journalist infiltrated three white supremacist platforms, including the dating site WhiteDate, exfiltrating over 8,000 user profiles and 100GB of sensitive data.
cybernews.com
January 3, 2026 at 10:27 AM
"A woman dressed as a pink Power Ranger hacked a dating site for far-right extremists. She deleted the entire site, but first she made users fall in love with AI bots she ran, thus obtaining information about them. Over 8,000 far-right profiles have now been mapped."
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
You can give a man a world class education, a long career writing and editing, and he'll still brazenly claim to not parse a sentence of three syllable words because shame is for the peasantry
But can anyone tell me what this bit means? “For too long, those fluent in the good grammar of civility have deployed decorum to mask agendas of cruelty.”
January 2, 2026 at 12:11 PM
You can give a man a world class education, a long career writing and editing, and he'll still brazenly claim to not parse a sentence of three syllable words because shame is for the peasantry
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
If the best remunerated politics understanders in Britain yet again cannot explain the most obvious shit, and they never get fired for being bad at their jobs, then you have to conclude that either a) they are paid to not understand, or b) they have been hired *because* they cannot ever understand.
The deepest analysis of Labour’s woes Chris Mason can offer involves poring over polling %ages, wibbling about comms & halfhearted gestures at y’know, social media & stuff. If you’re after anything about its wildly unpopular policies or strategy of wooing people who hate it, sorry, he’s not your man
Why 2026 is Keir Starmer's make or break year
With devolved elections coming up, questions over Labour’s direction and internal 'campaigning' already underway according to some insiders, where does this all leave the prime minister?
www.bbc.co.uk
December 31, 2025 at 10:23 AM
If the best remunerated politics understanders in Britain yet again cannot explain the most obvious shit, and they never get fired for being bad at their jobs, then you have to conclude that either a) they are paid to not understand, or b) they have been hired *because* they cannot ever understand.
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
Like I said yesterday: the Pundit’s Party. The Venn diagram for “people still supporting the government” vs “people who were overjoyed by the creation of Change UK” is a fucking red dot.
you can equally easily answer this question by asking 'which members of the public is this party supposed to appeal to?' and realising that it's a demographic almost exclusively comprised of journalists
Glad the FT is asking the question. Even if I’m not convinced they found a compelling answer.
I get that Starmer & Reeves are unpopular, I really don’t understand the extent of the dislike.
www.ft.com/content/1995... ‘There’s a real dislike, even loathing’: why voters hate Starmer and Reeves
I get that Starmer & Reeves are unpopular, I really don’t understand the extent of the dislike.
www.ft.com/content/1995... ‘There’s a real dislike, even loathing’: why voters hate Starmer and Reeves
December 31, 2025 at 10:27 AM
Like I said yesterday: the Pundit’s Party. The Venn diagram for “people still supporting the government” vs “people who were overjoyed by the creation of Change UK” is a fucking red dot.
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
you can equally easily answer this question by asking 'which members of the public is this party supposed to appeal to?' and realising that it's a demographic almost exclusively comprised of journalists
Glad the FT is asking the question. Even if I’m not convinced they found a compelling answer.
I get that Starmer & Reeves are unpopular, I really don’t understand the extent of the dislike.
www.ft.com/content/1995... ‘There’s a real dislike, even loathing’: why voters hate Starmer and Reeves
I get that Starmer & Reeves are unpopular, I really don’t understand the extent of the dislike.
www.ft.com/content/1995... ‘There’s a real dislike, even loathing’: why voters hate Starmer and Reeves
‘There’s a real dislike, even loathing’: why voters hate Starmer and Reeves
Allies concede the prime minister and chancellor have made mistakes yet the level of disdain towards them is still striking
www.ft.com
December 31, 2025 at 10:25 AM
you can equally easily answer this question by asking 'which members of the public is this party supposed to appeal to?' and realising that it's a demographic almost exclusively comprised of journalists
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
The only interesting thing about that Fabian bullshit is how inbred Labour are. You're telling me the guy who's talking utter shite about orthodox social democratic politics is the child of two right wing Labour MPs and has failed upwards to head a think tank? Say it ain't so!
December 31, 2025 at 10:53 AM
The only interesting thing about that Fabian bullshit is how inbred Labour are. You're telling me the guy who's talking utter shite about orthodox social democratic politics is the child of two right wing Labour MPs and has failed upwards to head a think tank? Say it ain't so!
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
One of the best to ever do it
December 30, 2025 at 2:09 PM
One of the best to ever do it
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
Bari Weiss’ two accomplishments so far are hosting an interview that she desperately wanted people to watch (but they didn’t) and trying to spike a news story that she desperately wanted nobody to watch (but they did)
December 24, 2025 at 9:52 PM
Bari Weiss’ two accomplishments so far are hosting an interview that she desperately wanted people to watch (but they didn’t) and trying to spike a news story that she desperately wanted nobody to watch (but they did)
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
THE 21st CENTURY:
HUMANITY: Hmm, climate change is a real problem but we're starting to reach the point where most of us acknowledge that something needs to be done.
A.I. DEVS: HEY WE INVENTED THIS GREAT THING THAT EATS FORESTS AND CRAPS OUT GARBAGE, IT ALSO STOPS YOUR BRAIN WORKING
HUMANITY: Hmm, climate change is a real problem but we're starting to reach the point where most of us acknowledge that something needs to be done.
A.I. DEVS: HEY WE INVENTED THIS GREAT THING THAT EATS FORESTS AND CRAPS OUT GARBAGE, IT ALSO STOPS YOUR BRAIN WORKING
October 3, 2025 at 4:21 PM
THE 21st CENTURY:
HUMANITY: Hmm, climate change is a real problem but we're starting to reach the point where most of us acknowledge that something needs to be done.
A.I. DEVS: HEY WE INVENTED THIS GREAT THING THAT EATS FORESTS AND CRAPS OUT GARBAGE, IT ALSO STOPS YOUR BRAIN WORKING
HUMANITY: Hmm, climate change is a real problem but we're starting to reach the point where most of us acknowledge that something needs to be done.
A.I. DEVS: HEY WE INVENTED THIS GREAT THING THAT EATS FORESTS AND CRAPS OUT GARBAGE, IT ALSO STOPS YOUR BRAIN WORKING
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
The British press publishes ten transphobic articles a day because it is deeply concerned about violence against women and girls, apparently.
December 20, 2025 at 8:53 AM
The British press publishes ten transphobic articles a day because it is deeply concerned about violence against women and girls, apparently.
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
Bjork's hitboxes are wild
December 16, 2025 at 6:34 PM
Bjork's hitboxes are wild
Reposted by Englishman in New Jorts
Looking forward to what other regional employment tribunals the media will be reporting on en masse today! Race discrimination in Scunthorpe? Sex discrimination in Yeovil? Homophobia in Wrexham? Or is it only GCs who lost their case that get this treatment
December 9, 2025 at 10:25 AM
Looking forward to what other regional employment tribunals the media will be reporting on en masse today! Race discrimination in Scunthorpe? Sex discrimination in Yeovil? Homophobia in Wrexham? Or is it only GCs who lost their case that get this treatment