Reposted by Cassandra
Reposted by Cassandra
"Western civilization," the font, the 11 stars - 11 states in the confederacy, for the record.
Why is this never news? Why are we letting our government agencies do this sort of thing while the news agencies report on hallucinated trade deals and act like everything is normal
Why is this never news? Why are we letting our government agencies do this sort of thing while the news agencies report on hallucinated trade deals and act like everything is normal
November 29, 2025 at 5:20 PM
"Western civilization," the font, the 11 stars - 11 states in the confederacy, for the record.
Why is this never news? Why are we letting our government agencies do this sort of thing while the news agencies report on hallucinated trade deals and act like everything is normal
Why is this never news? Why are we letting our government agencies do this sort of thing while the news agencies report on hallucinated trade deals and act like everything is normal
Reposted by Cassandra
Show your loved ones how little you'll spend https://membership.theonion.com/gifts/?campaign=701a500001HI8w6AAD&
November 29, 2025 at 5:30 PM
Show your loved ones how little you'll spend https://membership.theonion.com/gifts/?campaign=701a500001HI8w6AAD&
Reposted by Cassandra
how many times has the Seattle Times run a "compassion is great, but" editorial arguing for a lack of compassion at this point? we get it, you think homelessness should be illegal, find literally anything else to talk about. (Also, no Seattle neighborhood has been "destroyed," good god.)
November 29, 2025 at 5:27 PM
how many times has the Seattle Times run a "compassion is great, but" editorial arguing for a lack of compassion at this point? we get it, you think homelessness should be illegal, find literally anything else to talk about. (Also, no Seattle neighborhood has been "destroyed," good god.)
This is the hardest I've laughed in DAYS
Leave little Saruman alone.
Some of those dogs at the dog show are just obscene abominations unto the lord.
November 29, 2025 at 3:34 AM
This is the hardest I've laughed in DAYS
Reposted by Cassandra
Is it the end of the story? No. Does it rectify what he's done? No. But it tells us that we can win. And sometimes we need to hear that.
November 27, 2025 at 2:06 PM
Is it the end of the story? No. Does it rectify what he's done? No. But it tells us that we can win. And sometimes we need to hear that.
Reposted by Cassandra
Me buying a copy of The Onion when I was 18: "let's see what those rascals are up to now."
Me subscribing to The Onion now: "It is my duty as a patriot to see what those rascals are up to now."
Me subscribing to The Onion now: "It is my duty as a patriot to see what those rascals are up to now."
Hi everybody,
It's Black Friday, a big day for us at The Onion, since we rely almost entirely on your memberships.
Our goal for 2026? More print subscribers than the Washington Post.
This is, somehow, feasible.
So sign up! A year of print is $75 for the year today. Help us do a very funny thing.
It's Black Friday, a big day for us at The Onion, since we rely almost entirely on your memberships.
Our goal for 2026? More print subscribers than the Washington Post.
This is, somehow, feasible.
So sign up! A year of print is $75 for the year today. Help us do a very funny thing.
Join The Onion
Don’t just read the news. Feel it. Be among the first to feel the news.
membership.theonion.com
November 28, 2025 at 5:50 PM
Me buying a copy of The Onion when I was 18: "let's see what those rascals are up to now."
Me subscribing to The Onion now: "It is my duty as a patriot to see what those rascals are up to now."
Me subscribing to The Onion now: "It is my duty as a patriot to see what those rascals are up to now."
Reposted by Cassandra
I saw my book in a library today. You should check it out 😆
Or buy your own copy: www.harpercollins.com/products/kno...
Or buy your own copy: www.harpercollins.com/products/kno...
November 27, 2025 at 3:15 AM
I saw my book in a library today. You should check it out 😆
Or buy your own copy: www.harpercollins.com/products/kno...
Or buy your own copy: www.harpercollins.com/products/kno...
Reposted by Cassandra
Shout out to everyone else dealing with inlaws who won't give up on expired food this holiday.
I'm throwing out old mayo and cream cheese and hiding them in the bottom of the garbage can
I'm throwing out old mayo and cream cheese and hiding them in the bottom of the garbage can
November 27, 2025 at 4:58 PM
Shout out to everyone else dealing with inlaws who won't give up on expired food this holiday.
I'm throwing out old mayo and cream cheese and hiding them in the bottom of the garbage can
I'm throwing out old mayo and cream cheese and hiding them in the bottom of the garbage can
A pleasure denied me ever since I got myself banned from the subreddut for saying I wanted to fight someone's entire family
My favorite part of the holidays is logging on to AITA the day afterwards.
November 28, 2025 at 10:53 PM
A pleasure denied me ever since I got myself banned from the subreddut for saying I wanted to fight someone's entire family
Well this is absolutely devastating.
Police knew she was selling fake Percocet but did not stop her.
His mother sought the right treatment for his addiction but couldn’t find it.
Two teens got caught up in a system unprepared to handle kids on either side of the drug trade.
(Published Sept. 2024)
His mother sought the right treatment for his addiction but couldn’t find it.
Two teens got caught up in a system unprepared to handle kids on either side of the drug trade.
(Published Sept. 2024)
Maylia and Jack: A Story of Teens and Fentanyl
Police knew she was selling fake Percocet but did not stop her. His mother sought the right treatment for his addiction but could not find it. Two teens got caught up in a system unprepared to handle ...
www.propublica.org
November 28, 2025 at 8:50 PM
Well this is absolutely devastating.
In the spirit of old Mad Magazine, please allow me to say this: today is Blecch Friday
November 28, 2025 at 5:12 PM
Reposted by Cassandra
Remember to thank Rebecda Black today for inventing Fridays, we honor her today on Black Friday
November 28, 2025 at 2:21 PM
Remember to thank Rebecda Black today for inventing Fridays, we honor her today on Black Friday
Heartwarming 😊
It’s telling that Bruce’s biggest loss was in the district that knew him best.
November 27, 2025 at 7:06 PM
Heartwarming 😊
Reposted by Cassandra
If they want to slow down the Trump administration, Democrats should begin promising this *now*
We're gonna need a truth and reconciliation commission and Nuremberg style trials to reckon with all of this evil, and any Dem candidate for office who shies away from a full reckoning in the name of "moving forward as a nation" can get well and truly fucked
I feel much safer today knowing that we deported a Babson College student back to a country where she hasn't lived since childhood.
She wasn't even flying internationally. She was flying to Texas.
She wasn't even flying internationally. She was flying to Texas.
November 27, 2025 at 4:53 PM
If they want to slow down the Trump administration, Democrats should begin promising this *now*
I like this about Around Here. It makes me happy when it rains all the time. Happy like that dinosaur on the right.
November 27, 2025 at 5:11 AM
I like this about Around Here. It makes me happy when it rains all the time. Happy like that dinosaur on the right.
Reposted by Cassandra
TIL the first "serious" attempt to scale K2 included Aleister fuckin' Crowley and it all makes sense now
November 27, 2025 at 4:11 AM
TIL the first "serious" attempt to scale K2 included Aleister fuckin' Crowley and it all makes sense now
For their own good!
Like seriously what is wrong with people with too much money
"Im going to the bottom of the ocean" "im going in a volcano" "im going into space" "im climbing a dangerous mountain"
Raise the taxes for their own safety my god
"Im going to the bottom of the ocean" "im going in a volcano" "im going into space" "im climbing a dangerous mountain"
Raise the taxes for their own safety my god
November 27, 2025 at 4:50 AM
For their own good!
Reposted by Cassandra
Any 2028 candidate who uses terms like "turn the page" or "move on" must be laughed off of the continent.
November 26, 2025 at 6:32 PM
Any 2028 candidate who uses terms like "turn the page" or "move on" must be laughed off of the continent.
Reposted by Cassandra
Lots of people sharing this clip because it's funny and cathartic but I also genuinely believe it's important.
We have to win the narrative battle between "I live in a corrupt society and that's just how it is" and "I live in a corrupt society and we are going to defeat and humiliate these ghouls."
We have to win the narrative battle between "I live in a corrupt society and that's just how it is" and "I live in a corrupt society and we are going to defeat and humiliate these ghouls."
Good morning to Brazilian reporter Manuela Borges, who’s been waiting eleven years for this petty moment. ❤️ 🇧🇷
November 26, 2025 at 4:07 PM
Lots of people sharing this clip because it's funny and cathartic but I also genuinely believe it's important.
We have to win the narrative battle between "I live in a corrupt society and that's just how it is" and "I live in a corrupt society and we are going to defeat and humiliate these ghouls."
We have to win the narrative battle between "I live in a corrupt society and that's just how it is" and "I live in a corrupt society and we are going to defeat and humiliate these ghouls."
!!!
Apparently these folk have never considered the idea that children are more likely to voluntarily hug you when you’re not a person who forces them to hug you while they physically recoil
November 26, 2025 at 6:53 PM
!!!
!!
That's exactly how it should be done. Nobody can control their feelings. They happen. But an adult should very easily be able to process that feeling hurt from a child rejecting a hug isn't nearly as important as helping the child feel safe and comfortable.
November 26, 2025 at 6:52 PM
!!
Lol
"Grandparenting on eggshells"
"Grandparenting on eggshells"
Yep this sounds like someone who would speak to a representative sample of grandparents
November 26, 2025 at 3:05 PM
Lol
"Grandparenting on eggshells"
"Grandparenting on eggshells"
House of Pies! 😭 My last visit was 15 years ago this month. PITY ME
Bayou Goo pie from House of Pies is undefeated
November 26, 2025 at 12:21 AM
House of Pies! 😭 My last visit was 15 years ago this month. PITY ME