Johnny Arguedas
@johnnyphoto.bsky.social
Like an empty hotel room.
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
You can say Merry Protein again
January 12, 2026 at 7:57 AM
You can say Merry Protein again
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
i know we're all busy but i just overheard a plumber say "parlez-vous français ? non ? you motherfuckers don't even speak french, do you" to a pair of french bulldogs
January 8, 2026 at 2:18 PM
i know we're all busy but i just overheard a plumber say "parlez-vous français ? non ? you motherfuckers don't even speak french, do you" to a pair of french bulldogs
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
This all seems pretty unbecoming of a FIFA Peace Prize winner
January 3, 2026 at 2:42 PM
This all seems pretty unbecoming of a FIFA Peace Prize winner
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
there is a true nap and a false nap. the false nap is scheduled. a true nap must be taken when necessary. the false nap is timed. a true nap must be unfettered. the false nap's goal is to return to work. a true nap's goal is to play within the mind
January 2, 2026 at 11:31 AM
there is a true nap and a false nap. the false nap is scheduled. a true nap must be taken when necessary. the false nap is timed. a true nap must be unfettered. the false nap's goal is to return to work. a true nap's goal is to play within the mind
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
"engage your core" what am I, a nuclear power plant? The earth? Do I look like an apple to you?
January 2, 2026 at 2:36 AM
"engage your core" what am I, a nuclear power plant? The earth? Do I look like an apple to you?
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
They say imitation crab is the sincerest form of crab
December 27, 2025 at 1:56 PM
They say imitation crab is the sincerest form of crab
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
If you got a problem, yo, I'll solvent, check out the gunk, isopropyl dissolves it
December 22, 2025 at 6:33 PM
If you got a problem, yo, I'll solvent, check out the gunk, isopropyl dissolves it
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
December 17, 2025 at 10:00 PM
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
insanely good thing to say when you enter a room
December 13, 2025 at 9:04 AM
insanely good thing to say when you enter a room
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
I’m a single issue voter and my issue is that those busses that bend in the middle should make accordion noises
December 11, 2025 at 7:57 PM
I’m a single issue voter and my issue is that those busses that bend in the middle should make accordion noises
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
It's impressive that Big Tech was like: We aren't douchy enough. What if we made asshole intelligence and burned up some of the earth's power and water faster?
December 8, 2025 at 4:25 PM
It's impressive that Big Tech was like: We aren't douchy enough. What if we made asshole intelligence and burned up some of the earth's power and water faster?
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
The Thing (1982, John Carpenter)
December 9, 2025 at 2:27 AM
The Thing (1982, John Carpenter)
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
Nobody. I do not think you can eat chair
December 8, 2025 at 2:02 AM
Nobody. I do not think you can eat chair
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
Scientists now believe that the human brain--a magic goo for worrying--can also be used to do other things
December 8, 2025 at 3:53 AM
Scientists now believe that the human brain--a magic goo for worrying--can also be used to do other things
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
AMERICAN CANTO
STAY AWAY FROM ME
AMERICAN CANTO
NUZZI LET ME BE
STAY AWAY FROM ME
AMERICAN CANTO
NUZZI LET ME BE
December 4, 2025 at 4:33 AM
AMERICAN CANTO
STAY AWAY FROM ME
AMERICAN CANTO
NUZZI LET ME BE
STAY AWAY FROM ME
AMERICAN CANTO
NUZZI LET ME BE
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
Scientists recently combined DNA of a cheetah with the DNA of a crab.
It went sideways real fast.
It went sideways real fast.
November 22, 2025 at 1:13 PM
Scientists recently combined DNA of a cheetah with the DNA of a crab.
It went sideways real fast.
It went sideways real fast.
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
What idiot called that little narc Elf on the Shelf and not Police Navidad?
November 15, 2023 at 9:55 PM
What idiot called that little narc Elf on the Shelf and not Police Navidad?
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
Weirdly, this is all part of a 50-year-long plan to get their parents back together
The identical twin brother of MAGA Texas Rep. Troy Nehls is hoping to replace his brother in Congress after Nehls announced his retirement on Saturday.
MAGA Rep. Tries to Hand Seat to Literally Identical Successor
Trever Nehls is hoping to replace his brother, Texas Rep. Troy Nehls, in Congress.
trib.al
November 30, 2025 at 4:57 AM
Weirdly, this is all part of a 50-year-long plan to get their parents back together
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
If someone tells you you're an absolute godsend, remember they may mean like a plague
December 13, 2024 at 1:38 PM
If someone tells you you're an absolute godsend, remember they may mean like a plague
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
This is the type of hater energy that will fuel us in the years ahead.
Good morning to Brazilian reporter Manuela Borges, who’s been waiting eleven years for this petty moment. ❤️ 🇧🇷
November 26, 2025 at 1:42 PM
This is the type of hater energy that will fuel us in the years ahead.
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
[first day working at olive garden]
CUSTOMER: can you bring us more breadsticks
ME: (remembering when you’re here you’re family) get them yourself
CUSTOMER: can you bring us more breadsticks
ME: (remembering when you’re here you’re family) get them yourself
January 1, 2025 at 2:27 AM
[first day working at olive garden]
CUSTOMER: can you bring us more breadsticks
ME: (remembering when you’re here you’re family) get them yourself
CUSTOMER: can you bring us more breadsticks
ME: (remembering when you’re here you’re family) get them yourself
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
Before the midterms of 1866, President Andrew Johnson called his congressional opponents traitors and said they should be hanged.
Voters were so profoundly moved by his words... that they gave his opponents a supermajority in Congress, and the nation got the Fourteenth Amendment.
Voters were so profoundly moved by his words... that they gave his opponents a supermajority in Congress, and the nation got the Fourteenth Amendment.
November 20, 2025 at 3:33 PM
Before the midterms of 1866, President Andrew Johnson called his congressional opponents traitors and said they should be hanged.
Voters were so profoundly moved by his words... that they gave his opponents a supermajority in Congress, and the nation got the Fourteenth Amendment.
Voters were so profoundly moved by his words... that they gave his opponents a supermajority in Congress, and the nation got the Fourteenth Amendment.
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
Reposted by Johnny Arguedas
some other familiar grocery store names that are brands for producer-owned agricultural co-ops:
Blue Diamond
Bob's Red Mill
Land O'Lakes
Tillamook
Welch's
Blue Diamond
Bob's Red Mill
Land O'Lakes
Tillamook
Welch's
My #SuperlativeCannedGoo tweet from the old place is making rounds again. Support co-op cranberry growers!
November 17, 2025 at 2:44 AM
some other familiar grocery store names that are brands for producer-owned agricultural co-ops:
Blue Diamond
Bob's Red Mill
Land O'Lakes
Tillamook
Welch's
Blue Diamond
Bob's Red Mill
Land O'Lakes
Tillamook
Welch's