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scaredgarlic.bsky.social
Allium Tremens
@scaredgarlic.bsky.social
7 followers 20 following 17 posts
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chuckwendig.bsky.social
Take a bird, leave a bird.

Here are four bird pics -- the conclusion of the EPIC BLUEBIRD SAGA which wasn't really epic nor was it a saga but here it is, in four snaps.

Photos by me.
Series of photos (1 out of 4) showing two bluebirds -- the male on a post, facing away, his electric blue feathers on full display. And coming in hot from the sky is the LADY BLUEBIRD, less colorful and more blue-gray, who is about to fuck his shit up. I dunno if this is a mating thing, or if she's just trying to beat the shit out of him, but she's definitely divebombing his head. Maybe he's into that sort of thing. I won't judge. Whether this is a spat or a mating ritual (or both, no shame), who can say? I'm not a licensed birdologist. In this photo her wings are in, tucked back like an F-14 Tomcat, and she's just dropping out of orbit. Photo by me, Chuck Wendig Series of photos (2 out of 4) showing two bluebirds -- the male on a post, facing away, his electric blue feathers on full display. And coming in hot from the sky is the LADY BLUEBIRD, less colorful and more blue-gray, who is about to fuck his shit up. I dunno if this is a mating thing, or if she's just trying to beat the shit out of him, but she's definitely divebombing his head. Maybe he's into that sort of thing. I won't judge. Whether this is a spat or a mating ritual (or both, no shame), who can say? I'm not a licensed birdologist. In this photo, she has made contact with the male, who is now like WTF as she is nearly all the way on top of him. Chaos reigns. Photo by me, Chuck Wendig Series of photos (3 out of 4) showing two bluebirds -- the male on a post, facing away, his electric blue feathers on full display. And coming in hot from the sky is the LADY BLUEBIRD, less colorful and more blue-gray, who is about to fuck his shit up. I dunno if this is a mating thing, or if she's just trying to beat the shit out of him, but she's definitely divebombing his head. Maybe he's into that sort of thing. I won't judge. Whether this is a spat or a mating ritual (or both, no shame), who can say? I'm not a licensed birdologist. In this photo, she has made contact with the male, one leg out right on his fool head. He looks like he's about to fall off the post, which would be pretty embarrassing for a bird. Do birds ever just like, fall? I've seen my dog trip on stuff and that's pretty embarrassing. It's like, you got four legs, dog, have some grace, jeez. Photo by me, Chuck Wendig Series of photos (4 out of 4) -- now it's down to just the male bluebird who is kind of doing this HOVERBIRB thing as he goes to leave the top of the post and go after the female, who is out of frame. Photo by me, Chuck Wendig
March 7, 2025 at 1:33 PM
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yeets.biz
wearing jewelry made of eggs to show my affluence
March 2, 2025 at 3:55 PM
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surprisedface.bsky.social
[foreplay]

Me: [driving a hot wheel over her naked body and making vroom noises]
February 25, 2025 at 11:00 PM
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surprisedface.bsky.social
AOL warned us of the dangers of logging on. It would play for us the screams of the damned. But we didn’t listen. We didn’t listen.
February 27, 2025 at 10:14 AM
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viktorwinetrout.bsky.social
[gas station attendant pulls the premium pump out and lets me sniff the nozzle] *I nod*
February 8, 2025 at 10:38 PM
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ygrene.bsky.social
just imagine you are a dog and then all of a sudden a vacuum cleaner becomes the president
November 23, 2024 at 4:54 PM
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wheeltod.bsky.social
My favorite conspiracy theory is that wagon of fat Oprah pulled onto the stage that one time had not actually come from her own body.
February 23, 2025 at 5:00 PM
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yeets.biz
you're in her DMs, i'm rounding up cattle to feed to her giant invisible twin sibling that occupies the hollow shell of a house up on the old hill, born the night the earth rumbled and every dog and whippoorwill howled inconsolably
May 31, 2023 at 8:25 PM
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yeets.biz
you're in her DMs, i'm the last survivor of a wrecked ship christened in her name, alone on this featureless muddy plain that rose from the depths, draped in seaweed and studded with horrible engravings depicting the secret history of the world
May 31, 2023 at 7:10 PM
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internethippo.bsky.social
So patronizing when the dentist patiently explains how to floss. I'm not a baby who doesn't know how to do basic things. I'm a baby who doesn't wanna
February 22, 2025 at 2:05 PM
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itsabbyyep.bsky.social
Me: I know pantyhose are a little dated but I love how they even out my skin tone

Teller: So is this not a robbery?

Me: No, it is
January 19, 2025 at 7:21 AM
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void.church
Yeah, maybe I’m a malevolent celestial influence but what are you going to do about it.
February 22, 2025 at 10:47 AM
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lukelukeluke.bsky.social
Attention birdwatchers! - When you see a rare bird that’s far off its course just know you are looking at the dumbest individual from that species
February 22, 2025 at 2:01 PM
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exocomics.com
old comic ☘️
November 14, 2023 at 11:29 AM
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skeetofgod.bsky.social
I created you in My image and I am an asshole.
February 21, 2025 at 7:42 PM
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madrigal.bsky.social
[kitchen nightmares] Gordon Ramsey gave this failing restaurant fresh shrimp. Let’s see if that changes how abusive this daughter is to her mother
February 21, 2025 at 3:20 AM
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bitshammer.bsky.social
February 16, 2025 at 10:09 PM
scaredgarlic.bsky.social
Today I made potato bread and cake, which is good because my PT unintentionally made a careless food-police adjacent comment at my session today. So I am going to eat both in celebration of my body, which tries very hard to support me in all of the ways that it can.
February 12, 2025 at 1:06 AM
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uncleduke1969.bsky.social
every day we see more and more evidence of society descending into utter lawlessness and chaos
A seagull drinks from a container marked “DOGS ONLY, NO SEAGULLS.”
February 6, 2025 at 12:32 PM
scaredgarlic.bsky.social
Gilmore Girls thoughts:

It is an unequivocal truth that Max Medina is not cute enough to be as f*cking annoying as he is in this show. It’s in poor taste tbh.
February 5, 2025 at 11:13 PM
scaredgarlic.bsky.social
Like, this isn’t bad but it also isn’t good. First batch is on top, the oil got too hot, and somewhere in the middle batches, the dough got too thin/pliable and started to rip. Maybe my filling is also too dry??
February 5, 2025 at 10:09 PM
scaredgarlic.bsky.social
Okay so like, this dough is way too soft and is tearing when I attempt to shape it. A question to any #Polish person who can help: how do I know if I’ve added enough flour to my dough?
February 5, 2025 at 10:01 PM
scaredgarlic.bsky.social
up next we bring to this stage: the ugliest pierogis I have ever seen
February 5, 2025 at 9:23 PM
scaredgarlic.bsky.social
This looks like nothing. It will become something. All of life is just dumplings that haven’t been made.
February 5, 2025 at 8:43 PM