Dad
@daddest.bsky.social
Sometimes we realize stuff.
My father is trying to get a permit for a small garden shed and had the shower epiphany that a city government is a giant HOA.
September 9, 2025 at 10:46 PM
Sometimes we realize stuff.
Brutal.
According to my local parent WhatsApp group, the new school playground insult is: "Your dad paints roundabouts"
September 6, 2025 at 1:22 PM
Brutal.
It’s my day and I’ll cry if I want to.
June 15, 2025 at 2:00 PM
It’s my day and I’ll cry if I want to.
And we were HAPPY
my kids: grandpa what kinds of toys did you have growing up?
my dad: a potato
my dad: a potato
June 7, 2025 at 3:12 AM
And we were HAPPY
Reposted by Dad
Sprauncy [SPRAHN-see] or [SHPRAWN-see]
(adj.)
-Smart or showy in appearance; dapper.
-Showily dressed; fashionable.
Used in a sentence:
“Well get a load of Mr. La-dee-da sprauncy-pants over there with his surtout and top hat! Just who does he think he is?”
(adj.)
-Smart or showy in appearance; dapper.
-Showily dressed; fashionable.
Used in a sentence:
“Well get a load of Mr. La-dee-da sprauncy-pants over there with his surtout and top hat! Just who does he think he is?”
May 25, 2025 at 1:55 AM
Sprauncy [SPRAHN-see] or [SHPRAWN-see]
(adj.)
-Smart or showy in appearance; dapper.
-Showily dressed; fashionable.
Used in a sentence:
“Well get a load of Mr. La-dee-da sprauncy-pants over there with his surtout and top hat! Just who does he think he is?”
(adj.)
-Smart or showy in appearance; dapper.
-Showily dressed; fashionable.
Used in a sentence:
“Well get a load of Mr. La-dee-da sprauncy-pants over there with his surtout and top hat! Just who does he think he is?”
Reposted by Dad
First day in prison, establishing myself as mitochondria
March 18, 2025 at 9:28 PM
First day in prison, establishing myself as mitochondria
My children have learned that when I say “fun fact…” what follows will not be fun for anybody but me
March 7, 2025 at 12:23 PM
My children have learned that when I say “fun fact…” what follows will not be fun for anybody but me
Reposted by Dad
No one in this ball pit is taking me seriously.
December 1, 2024 at 12:26 AM
No one in this ball pit is taking me seriously.
Reposted by Dad
The end of Daylight Saving Time is fun because we get to enjoy an extra hour of the dumbest time in history.
November 3, 2024 at 3:13 PM
The end of Daylight Saving Time is fun because we get to enjoy an extra hour of the dumbest time in history.
Reposted by Dad
You guys wanna get hepped up on espresso beans and listen to James Taylor
June 22, 2024 at 12:08 PM
You guys wanna get hepped up on espresso beans and listen to James Taylor
Reposted by Dad
You could be the pencil to my cassette tape but you playin'
June 8, 2024 at 9:49 AM
You could be the pencil to my cassette tape but you playin'
Reposted by Dad
Trying out quantum entanglement as a new excuse for why I’m running late to work
April 24, 2024 at 2:03 PM
Trying out quantum entanglement as a new excuse for why I’m running late to work
Reposted by Dad
How your email finds me..
February 24, 2024 at 10:30 PM
How your email finds me..
Good News! Get those prostates checked, people.
February 6, 2024 at 12:00 AM
Good News! Get those prostates checked, people.
I would party with these two.
February 5, 2024 at 11:58 PM
I would party with these two.
Even if I knew, I would still make my kid explain it just because I would find it hilarious.
February 5, 2024 at 11:57 PM
Even if I knew, I would still make my kid explain it just because I would find it hilarious.
Reposted by Dad
My favorite thing about winter is that my skin looks like it’s been dusted with Parmesan
January 17, 2024 at 5:47 PM
My favorite thing about winter is that my skin looks like it’s been dusted with Parmesan
I do this, but off the bed.
January 17, 2024 at 4:10 PM
I do this, but off the bed.
Those milestones can be so strange to feel. ❤️
January 13, 2024 at 4:26 PM
Those milestones can be so strange to feel. ❤️