deadpan
@deadpan.bsky.social
Reposted by deadpan
blue sky is supreme because every time you post you get 100 school principals in the replies asking to see you in their office
March 20, 2025 at 8:03 AM
blue sky is supreme because every time you post you get 100 school principals in the replies asking to see you in their office
Reposted by deadpan
dril was banned for disparaging jeffrey epstein and his beautiful aspirational lifestyle and wealth. the mod team said not today satan and it's about time.
February 4, 2026 at 5:57 PM
dril was banned for disparaging jeffrey epstein and his beautiful aspirational lifestyle and wealth. the mod team said not today satan and it's about time.
Reposted by deadpan
I used to drink the dirty snow slush that accumulated on the corners in NYC. It would make me deliriously sick but after two weeks of extreme fever/dysentery I was able to see four seconds into the future for 36 hours. This would be an invaluable asset in combat but unfortunately I am a man of peace
February 4, 2026 at 4:56 PM
I used to drink the dirty snow slush that accumulated on the corners in NYC. It would make me deliriously sick but after two weeks of extreme fever/dysentery I was able to see four seconds into the future for 36 hours. This would be an invaluable asset in combat but unfortunately I am a man of peace
Reposted by deadpan
Reposted by deadpan
After a lengthy appeals process and productive discussion with the Blue Sky safety team I will no loinger be sending George Thorogood lyrics to beautiful women on here via DM. Thank you all
February 4, 2026 at 5:02 PM
After a lengthy appeals process and productive discussion with the Blue Sky safety team I will no loinger be sending George Thorogood lyrics to beautiful women on here via DM. Thank you all
Reposted by deadpan
My little 💖💫💕 cryptid 💕💫💖
February 1, 2026 at 9:21 PM
My little 💖💫💕 cryptid 💕💫💖
Reposted by deadpan
"I bought it before he went crazy!"
You bought your Tesla before the end of apartheid?
You bought your Tesla before the end of apartheid?
February 3, 2026 at 4:12 PM
"I bought it before he went crazy!"
You bought your Tesla before the end of apartheid?
You bought your Tesla before the end of apartheid?
Reposted by deadpan
If nothing else, the Epstein files prove that people who email too much are dangerous sociopaths.
February 3, 2026 at 4:55 PM
If nothing else, the Epstein files prove that people who email too much are dangerous sociopaths.
Reposted by deadpan
Somebody let Dr. Van Helsing know that some imbecile pulled the stake out of Neil Gaiman.
February 3, 2026 at 2:33 AM
Somebody let Dr. Van Helsing know that some imbecile pulled the stake out of Neil Gaiman.
Reposted by deadpan
this looks like the headshot you would use if you were trying to do this as an Onion bit
February 3, 2026 at 1:58 AM
this looks like the headshot you would use if you were trying to do this as an Onion bit
Reposted by deadpan
BARI WEISS: I think it's so telling. Liberals only want to talk about the bad bunny. Whereas rational people like you and me, I think, people who can agree to disagree, we want to talk about the good bunny.
BILLIONAIRE CHILD RAPIST: [nodding]
BILLIONAIRE CHILD RAPIST: [nodding]
February 2, 2026 at 4:43 AM
BARI WEISS: I think it's so telling. Liberals only want to talk about the bad bunny. Whereas rational people like you and me, I think, people who can agree to disagree, we want to talk about the good bunny.
BILLIONAIRE CHILD RAPIST: [nodding]
BILLIONAIRE CHILD RAPIST: [nodding]
Reposted by deadpan
scene report
August 31, 2025 at 2:25 PM
scene report
Reposted by deadpan
this is your mission. our pedophile president needs you to wake up at 5 am and don 30 lbs of tactical gear you bought off amazon to sit in a chevy tahoe in the parking lot of the elementary school where you kidnapped a five year old kid to intimidate his teachers. good luck soldier
Columbia Heights (Liam's school district) cancelled school today because of a credible bomb threat at Liam's elementary and multiple ICE vehicles parking in the high school staff parking lot at 6:15am.
February 2, 2026 at 5:14 PM
this is your mission. our pedophile president needs you to wake up at 5 am and don 30 lbs of tactical gear you bought off amazon to sit in a chevy tahoe in the parking lot of the elementary school where you kidnapped a five year old kid to intimidate his teachers. good luck soldier
Reposted by deadpan
Reposted by deadpan
If you emailed an elite pervert with normal syntax and punctuation they'd make you immediately and cut off contact. You need to throw some typos and do the Epstein alpha "ghost period" thing . before sending Noam Chomsky some links to The Right Stuff Dot Biz. Then they know you're solid.
January 31, 2026 at 5:07 AM
If you emailed an elite pervert with normal syntax and punctuation they'd make you immediately and cut off contact. You need to throw some typos and do the Epstein alpha "ghost period" thing . before sending Noam Chomsky some links to The Right Stuff Dot Biz. Then they know you're solid.
Reposted by deadpan
One of the funniest conspiracy theories is that Kubrick was killed for Eyes Wide Shut but at the same time they were like "well he worked really hard on this, only fair to give it a wide release"
January 31, 2026 at 4:10 AM
One of the funniest conspiracy theories is that Kubrick was killed for Eyes Wide Shut but at the same time they were like "well he worked really hard on this, only fair to give it a wide release"
Reposted by deadpan
Hello, this is Elon Musk, am I speaking to world famous pedophile Jeffrey Epstein? Yes, ok good. What day will the wildest party be happening on Pedophile Island, and will there be room for my bulky Alienware PC in the overhead compartment on the helicopter?
January 30, 2026 at 9:20 PM
Hello, this is Elon Musk, am I speaking to world famous pedophile Jeffrey Epstein? Yes, ok good. What day will the wildest party be happening on Pedophile Island, and will there be room for my bulky Alienware PC in the overhead compartment on the helicopter?
Reposted by deadpan
Reposted by deadpan
Kaleb Horton’s loved ones have assembled his work here. Treat yourself to some of the best writing and podcasting this century:
www.kalebchorton.com
www.kalebchorton.com
Kaleb Horton
www.kalebchorton.com
January 27, 2026 at 5:48 AM
Kaleb Horton’s loved ones have assembled his work here. Treat yourself to some of the best writing and podcasting this century:
www.kalebchorton.com
www.kalebchorton.com
Reposted by deadpan
god remember when tv was good
January 26, 2026 at 4:44 PM
god remember when tv was good
Reposted by deadpan
this man just tried to convince me to invest in something called BerriesAndCreamCoin
we need to go back to athletes not trying to be fashionable
January 25, 2026 at 11:50 PM
this man just tried to convince me to invest in something called BerriesAndCreamCoin
Reposted by deadpan
Reposted by deadpan
Reposted by deadpan
I am going to create a site that only lets people bet on this particular thing. ItDuel, I might call it.
January 21, 2026 at 6:06 AM
I am going to create a site that only lets people bet on this particular thing. ItDuel, I might call it.