Sara THE MURDERIEST UNICORN
@saraterror.bsky.social
Murdery unicorn. Horror writer & reader. Herder of feral cats. Disabled badass (pudendal neuralgia, severe light sensitivity). Survivor. ADHD chaos muppet. Queen of seahorse penises. Queer. Boob monster. Face biter.
Pinned
I will never regret getting this tattoo.
Reposted by Sara THE MURDERIEST UNICORN
you’re crying, you’re literally sculpted in the ancient goddess aphrodite’s image with soft tummies and thighs, and you’re crying
December 10, 2025 at 8:19 PM
you’re crying, you’re literally sculpted in the ancient goddess aphrodite’s image with soft tummies and thighs, and you’re crying
When you go through a bad breakup, you get to have a Junji Ito UZUMAKI rug, right? That's how the universe works, right?
December 12, 2025 at 12:24 AM
When you go through a bad breakup, you get to have a Junji Ito UZUMAKI rug, right? That's how the universe works, right?
Reposted by Sara THE MURDERIEST UNICORN
'Let it Snow' with all the positive lines removed
December 11, 2025 at 9:33 PM
'Let it Snow' with all the positive lines removed
Reposted by Sara THE MURDERIEST UNICORN
the gayest most mafioso interview i have ever seen and i love them both. if you've got agent provocateur money, you better wear it for yourself. 🥰
December 11, 2025 at 11:20 PM
the gayest most mafioso interview i have ever seen and i love them both. if you've got agent provocateur money, you better wear it for yourself. 🥰
Ohhhhjh my god, I did not contemplate the collision between kitten and PTSD startle response. Floof's gonna be the death of me.
December 11, 2025 at 11:27 PM
Ohhhhjh my god, I did not contemplate the collision between kitten and PTSD startle response. Floof's gonna be the death of me.
I had to break up with someone I love and when my heart is broken, I need the cozy horror of the Gravekeeper series by Darcy Coates. (Yes, Zoe is eerily similar to my cartoonish ass. This has been pointed out to me before.) I'm also going to lean even harder into being a cat lady now.
December 11, 2025 at 8:12 PM
I had to break up with someone I love and when my heart is broken, I need the cozy horror of the Gravekeeper series by Darcy Coates. (Yes, Zoe is eerily similar to my cartoonish ass. This has been pointed out to me before.) I'm also going to lean even harder into being a cat lady now.
Has any veterinary appointment in the history of veterinary appointments ever started on time? Asking for my crippled ass, which is in agony after sitting on this bench for 40 minutes.
December 11, 2025 at 6:39 PM
Has any veterinary appointment in the history of veterinary appointments ever started on time? Asking for my crippled ass, which is in agony after sitting on this bench for 40 minutes.
ATTENTION: A CAT IS NOW WATCHING THE CAT SHOW
December 11, 2025 at 5:07 PM
ATTENTION: A CAT IS NOW WATCHING THE CAT SHOW
I've always wanted a cat that loves me so much it follows me everywhere. And the universe laughed and said "One endless tripping hazard coming right up."
December 11, 2025 at 3:50 PM
I've always wanted a cat that loves me so much it follows me everywhere. And the universe laughed and said "One endless tripping hazard coming right up."
Cat: Can I sit on your lap?
Me: Awww you're so cute, of course you can.
Cat: SO I CAN BITE IT!
Me: Awww you're so cute, of course you can.
Cat: SO I CAN BITE IT!
December 11, 2025 at 3:05 PM
Cat: Can I sit on your lap?
Me: Awww you're so cute, of course you can.
Cat: SO I CAN BITE IT!
Me: Awww you're so cute, of course you can.
Cat: SO I CAN BITE IT!
It's so funny when your cat's favorite toy is the string on the hoodie you're wearing, until approximately twenty thousand overenthusiastic claws sink into your boob.
December 11, 2025 at 3:52 AM
It's so funny when your cat's favorite toy is the string on the hoodie you're wearing, until approximately twenty thousand overenthusiastic claws sink into your boob.
Reposted by Sara THE MURDERIEST UNICORN
When I take a nap with the feral kitten I rescued, he insists on holding hands. I have to hold one of his paws and/or he rests his paw on my hand. Last night he full-on wrapped his front legs around my arm and pulled it down to make a pillow for his head 🥹
December 10, 2025 at 10:57 PM
When I take a nap with the feral kitten I rescued, he insists on holding hands. I have to hold one of his paws and/or he rests his paw on my hand. Last night he full-on wrapped his front legs around my arm and pulled it down to make a pillow for his head 🥹
I've had a really horrible few days, and I am so grateful this floofy, goofy feral cat decided to love and trust me. It is impossible to not laugh around this fella.
December 10, 2025 at 4:00 AM
I've had a really horrible few days, and I am so grateful this floofy, goofy feral cat decided to love and trust me. It is impossible to not laugh around this fella.
Reposted by Sara THE MURDERIEST UNICORN
Christmas office vultures be upon you
Yes my coworkers think I'm insane, don't worry
Yes my coworkers think I'm insane, don't worry
December 3, 2025 at 7:03 PM
Christmas office vultures be upon you
Yes my coworkers think I'm insane, don't worry
Yes my coworkers think I'm insane, don't worry
Reposted by Sara THE MURDERIEST UNICORN
We knew what woke meant just fine before y'all stole it. It had an established, agreed upon definition in common usage.
In the wholesale mass cultural appropriation of the AAVE term "woke," removing it from its Black context & never caring to ask Black folks what it means, it's made so white people on the left & right alike constantly try to define it. No one's supposed to know what it means, its meaning is hollow.
December 1, 2025 at 4:49 PM
We knew what woke meant just fine before y'all stole it. It had an established, agreed upon definition in common usage.
My cat: Mother, why is the bird dead? Why does the bird no longer fly for me?
Me: You’re sitting on it.
Cat: *long pause*
Cat: MOTHER, WHY IS THE BIRD DEAD? WHY DOES THE BIRD NO LONGER FLY FOR ME?
Me: You’re sitting on it.
Cat: *long pause*
Cat: MOTHER, WHY IS THE BIRD DEAD? WHY DOES THE BIRD NO LONGER FLY FOR ME?
December 1, 2025 at 3:51 PM
My cat: Mother, why is the bird dead? Why does the bird no longer fly for me?
Me: You’re sitting on it.
Cat: *long pause*
Cat: MOTHER, WHY IS THE BIRD DEAD? WHY DOES THE BIRD NO LONGER FLY FOR ME?
Me: You’re sitting on it.
Cat: *long pause*
Cat: MOTHER, WHY IS THE BIRD DEAD? WHY DOES THE BIRD NO LONGER FLY FOR ME?
how can a cat this tiny smell so bad
December 1, 2025 at 4:03 AM
how can a cat this tiny smell so bad
These earrings are getting compliments everywhere. And also alarmed flurries of glances. It’s funny when I’m in my mask and glasses. People stop understanding I can still see their faces even if they can’t see mine.
Yes, me and my naked lady earrings from @peculiarityshop.bsky.social are fabulous. Thank you for noticing.
November 30, 2025 at 9:09 PM
These earrings are getting compliments everywhere. And also alarmed flurries of glances. It’s funny when I’m in my mask and glasses. People stop understanding I can still see their faces even if they can’t see mine.
Reposted by Sara THE MURDERIEST UNICORN
Me: I’ve had laryngitis for almost two months. Singing is a piece of my soul.
Me: I despise losing my voice. I need to rest it as much as possible to end this nightmare
Also me: *scampering around the house mimicking the “find my iPhone” alarm for five minutes straight for absolutely no reason*
Me: I despise losing my voice. I need to rest it as much as possible to end this nightmare
Also me: *scampering around the house mimicking the “find my iPhone” alarm for five minutes straight for absolutely no reason*
November 30, 2025 at 3:11 PM
Me: I’ve had laryngitis for almost two months. Singing is a piece of my soul.
Me: I despise losing my voice. I need to rest it as much as possible to end this nightmare
Also me: *scampering around the house mimicking the “find my iPhone” alarm for five minutes straight for absolutely no reason*
Me: I despise losing my voice. I need to rest it as much as possible to end this nightmare
Also me: *scampering around the house mimicking the “find my iPhone” alarm for five minutes straight for absolutely no reason*
Reposted by Sara THE MURDERIEST UNICORN
𝔗𝔥𝔦𝔠𝔨𝔢𝔱 𝔓𝔞𝔯𝔢𝔦𝔡𝔬𝔩𝔦𝔞
November 29, 2025 at 4:03 PM
𝔗𝔥𝔦𝔠𝔨𝔢𝔱 𝔓𝔞𝔯𝔢𝔦𝔡𝔬𝔩𝔦𝔞
WOOOOOOOOOO
November 29, 2025 at 5:00 PM
WOOOOOOOOOO
Reposted by Sara THE MURDERIEST UNICORN
Change in plans. Needed the backup hood I keep at my mom’s to shield my peripheral vision when my light sensitivity gets bad. What the fuck animal is this supposed to be? Werewolf? Ewok?
November 27, 2025 at 11:04 PM
Change in plans. Needed the backup hood I keep at my mom’s to shield my peripheral vision when my light sensitivity gets bad. What the fuck animal is this supposed to be? Werewolf? Ewok?
November 29, 2025 at 4:41 PM