Andrew Evans
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fakeandrewevans.bsky.social
Andrew Evans
@fakeandrewevans.bsky.social
We made it. It’s all going to be fine.
Reposted by Andrew Evans
But we're going to touch the stove and we'll be touching it more than probably ever before. And we're not going to get burned. We're not going to get burned
March 3, 2025 at 1:25 PM
Reposted by Andrew Evans
"It wasn't murder, and if you say it was murder we will kill you, which again will not be murder."
Homan: "We gotta stop the hateful rhetoric. Saying this officer is a murderer is dangerous. It's just ridiculous. It's gonna infuriate people more which means there's gonna be more incidents like this."
January 11, 2026 at 5:04 PM
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ICE recruitment is going well.
January 11, 2026 at 2:12 AM
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[sombrely, with tears in eyes] "truly the people of Iran embody the great spirit of Flumpo The Fart Wizard" - author of Flumpo The Fart Wizard
January 11, 2026 at 11:53 AM
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(woman who's only read her own Harry Potter books) I'm getting some real Harry Potter vibes from this Iranian political rebellion
the narcissism and myopia is genuinely astounding at times
January 10, 2026 at 9:54 PM
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The reactionary centrist logic is simple: if the left does something bad it’s the left’s fault, and if the right does something bad, it’s also the left’s fault for making them do it. It’s a simple formula and once you see it every one of their arguments is the same
January 10, 2026 at 11:24 PM
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I will read every interview with Heated Rivalry writer and director Jacob Tierney because his quotes are truly a reporter's dream: www.rollingstone.com/music/music-...
January 9, 2026 at 11:42 PM
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that’s why they say “all cops” and not “some cops”
The Minneapolis Police Department has declared tonight’s protest outside a downtown hotel an unlawful assembly, calling it a public nuisance, and ordered the crowd to disperse. bit.ly/3Yu1KW3
January 10, 2026 at 5:25 AM
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every once in a while you can see someone look down and realize the cliff is gone from under their feet
January 9, 2026 at 5:54 PM
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Leaving my house with the ‘don’t tread on me’ flag on it, putting on my mask and tactical gear, strapping on my weapon, and roaming the cities and towns that didn’t vote for my favorite candidate as an armed anonymous agent of the state kidnapping and shooting people who I don’t like the look of.
ICE agent Jonathan Ross, who shot and killed an unarmed civilian, flew a don't-tread-on-me Gadsden flag at his house, per the Daily Mail.
January 9, 2026 at 3:10 PM
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Add another one to the great big board of "Urban Planning Debates: Academic Research vs. Some Guy"
January 8, 2026 at 7:36 PM
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wow really helpful, thank you new york times
October 24, 2025 at 2:57 PM
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January 9, 2026 at 2:44 AM
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Holy fuck they actually did it
January 8, 2026 at 11:44 PM
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The most charitable interpretation of the contradictory DHS statement is that everyone in DHS is an inhuman monster that feeds on the blood of fleeing innocents
January 9, 2026 at 1:45 AM
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These people will fire and deport you for insufficiently glazing Charlie Kirk but openly celebrate killings against perceived ideological enemies.
January 7, 2026 at 11:45 PM
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Bari Weiss's Free Press website ran this screed by Matt Taibbi defending his lawsuit against a book author.

But the Free Press apparently never reached out to the author. Even though Weiss spiked that 60 Minutes piece for not reaching out to enough Trump officials www.thefp.com/p/matt-taibb...
Matt Taibbi: To Protect Free Speech, I’m Suing the Man Who Defamed Me
There’s a difference between censorship, which prevents speech, and seeking restitution for a harmful lie already in print. That's why I'm suing the man who defamed me, writes Matt Taibbi.
www.thefp.com
January 6, 2026 at 3:27 AM
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"did you try to bribe the president of the united states by giving him your nobel peace prize so he will declare that you are in charge of venezuela after abducting its leader by military force" is just a thing that someone can be asked in an interview now and we all have to deal with that
Hannity: Did you at any point offered to give him the Nobel peace prize?

Machado: It hasn’t happened yet. We want to give it to him. Share it with him.
January 6, 2026 at 5:54 AM
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December 23, 2024 at 8:04 AM
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We are the world's bad guys.
www.hamiltonnolan.com/p/we-are-the...
We Are the Bad Guys
The swaggering threat to global stability is us.
www.hamiltonnolan.com
January 3, 2026 at 4:50 PM
Reposted by Andrew Evans
It’s almost like green energy is the only way forward and a handful of oil barons are doing everything in their power to keep that from happening so they can get even richer at the cost of literally everything else in the world.
Wall Street’s biggest banks made more money financing green projects than they did from working with fossil fuel companies for a fourth straight year, even as they faced ongoing pressure to pull back from the business
Banks Notch Higher Fees From Green Bonds Than Fossil Fuel Debt
Wall Street’s biggest banks made more money financing green projects than they did from working with fossil fuel companies for a fourth straight year, even as they faced ongoing pressure to pull back from the business.
bloom.bg
January 3, 2026 at 3:00 AM
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Hundreds of thousands of dead people in Afghanistan and Iraq, Gen Z is struggling with reading comprehension, and we live in a surveillance state started by Bush, who also created ICE, but hey at least he’s not Donald Trump
Not a fan of Bush but he was a step up from what we got now.
January 2, 2026 at 3:10 AM
Starting to see Instacart and other grocery delivery guys trying to finagle their way ahead of in-store shoppers, drives me nuts
One of my most crank opinions, solidified by waiting 20 minutes for my Wawa hoagie order while DoorDashers and Uber Eats drivers streamed in and out, is that restaurants should prioritize in-person orders.
One of the issues with Door Dash is how it makes it impossible to judge if a place is busy or not. This bagel place was empty when I got here and I’ve been waiting fifteen minutes while a parade of guys in helmets comes in and out.
January 1, 2026 at 6:53 PM
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2026: the year it happens
January 1, 2026 at 5:01 AM
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1> Politicians who hype the myth of high crime
2> Bad media like CP24 that repeats the same crimes ever few minutes ( Toronto is a war zone if you watch)
3> Bad faith social media accounts (IntegrityTO) who hype it and stupid social media influencer accounts who play on this
4> Police union hype
Inbox: "A new Liaison Strategies survey ... has identified a profound disconnect ... While official police data from Toronto, Peel, and York Regions highlights historic declines in high-profile crimes like homicide and auto theft, the vast majority of residents believe these crimes are surging"
December 31, 2025 at 4:24 PM