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Paul

@grommit56.bsky.social

2.8K followers 1.3K following 1.7K posts

Marriage, my dogs, golf, work, general stupidity. Blue is much more soothing than red. For mediocrity, press the link below bsky.app/profile/did:plc:cwzjygusjn5xjsu47dtcp2tl/feed/aaacbkeptqwsw

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Paul @grommit56.bsky.social · Aug 18

Get in loser. We're gonna take a nap.

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Chames @overlooked237.bsky.social · 53m

my magic 8 ball just started adding “bro” to all its responses

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Paul @grommit56.bsky.social · 1h

I hate that my brother gets anxiety attacks but not that he gets busy to work through them. So the Haunted Mansion tombstones got put out after all.

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grilled cheese 🧀 @grilldcheese.bsky.social · 3d

we say "everyone is unique" but you know deep down that you put everyone into a little box in your head and one of those boxes is dumb motherfuckers.

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Greeneville Zoo @greenevillezoo.bsky.social · 4h

It's World Octopus Day! These magnificent creatures have 9 brains, 8 arms, 3 hearts, and they hunt sharks. What are you even doing with your life?

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Kellaweena 🎃 @kellalena.bsky.social · 6h

Pun like everything is intended.

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Paul @grommit56.bsky.social · 2h

Just saw that. 😄

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Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 2d

"Better the devil you know than the devil you don't," is the secret to a long marriage.

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Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 2d

We need a supremer court.

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Paul @grommit56.bsky.social · 2h

The crab croquettes look interesting. And the 8oz filet. Medium rare please. We'll check out this sauce.

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Forrest Plump @nahyoudoit.bsky.social · 2h

My son asked me to watch a horror movie with him and I said “of course” and then he put on La La Land and laughed while I cryperventilated

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Fulkery @fulkery.bsky.social · 3h

Dippin’ Kings Hawaiian bread in ramen broth like the absolute thug that I am

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Shell @shelly3000.bsky.social · 3h

Never believe anything a Fuckface says.

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Paul @grommit56.bsky.social · 3h

Yes. I will in fact ignore the baseball playoffs now that I don't care about any of the teams left in it and watch the first of 82 games of my favorite hockey team that will probably suck pond water this year.

Go Bruins. Don't suck pond water.

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Mr. Bea Arthur, Dead Inside™️ @steamymac.bsky.social · 17h

Rhythm is gonna get you, but so is chlamydia.

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Gretchen @wokkax3.bsky.social · 9h

Just moved a doctors appointment back a month to give myself more time to become healthy and/or become a more convincing liar.

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Jake_Vig @jakevig.bsky.social · 13h

I do not respond well to people ignoring me or paying attention to me.

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kattsdogma.bsky.social @kattsdogma.bsky.social · 12h

why would you put yourself in that position, is a question i ask myself every time i have sex . folks,,

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DaddyJew @daddyjew.bsky.social · 1d

*looking over pizza box*
pre-heat my oven? ha! what is this, the Ritz?

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Seamus O'Flaugherty @seamussaid.bsky.social · 2d

Whenever I tell my kids they are putting the cart before the horse they look at me with dead eyes so I know it's time for me to explain how horse transportation worked

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Seamus O'Flaugherty @seamussaid.bsky.social · 2d

my autistic daughter got in trouble at school today for taking her pants off and dancing in class so she didn't get to eat what she wanted for dinner (punishment) but I let her dance buck naked in the moonlight tonight because she was just a little early for what her ancestors did every full moon

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stuforreal.bsky.social @stuforreal.bsky.social · 3d

You need to look in to your heart you piece of shit

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DaddyJew @daddyjew.bsky.social · 1d

my job doesn’t pay me enough to think about work outside of work

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Paul @grommit56.bsky.social · 1d

All day steady rain. Doesn't bug me but I hate forcing the dogs out to pee so they won't find somewhere inside.

But the "Father, why are you punishing me?" looks on their faces are priceless.

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Mr. Bea Arthur, Dead Inside™️ @steamymac.bsky.social · 1d

He died doing what he loved: rollerblading into oncoming traffic.

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Kellaweena 🎃 @kellalena.bsky.social · 1d

I see you over there looking at your Apple Watch like a Power Ranger.

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