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dumbdum.bsky.social
Dumbdum
@dumbdum.bsky.social
270 followers 310 following 960 posts
We do it for decoration. That’s it and that’s all man.
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joparkerbear.bsky.social
Brosephine Wires @joparkerbear.bsky.social · 23h
It’s been seven hours and sixteen days — yeah, that’s right. I clocked it, you bastard.
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Reposted by Dumbdum
murrman5.bsky.social
brent @murrman5.bsky.social · 1d
news reporter: so you really saw an alien and aren't just saying that to get on tv?
me with better haircut than usual: yeah that's right
2 20 170
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xinicit.bsky.social
Xavier Horatio Xinicit 🎉 @xinicit.bsky.social · 2d
“I’m jazzed up on Diet Coke,” he said middle agedly.
15 46
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uncleduke1969.bsky.social
Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 3d
“Please Claudette, let me come home. I promise I’ll try to be more supportive.”
A mattress in a phone booth, receiver to where its ear might be.
17 69 360
Reposted by Dumbdum
markpopham.bsky.social
good hyuck, babe! @markpopham.bsky.social · 4d
INVENTOR: ive got a great new toy idea for you, it's called... the Radio Flyer

TOY EXEC: oh wow, so it's like a plane that flies via... radio?

INVENTOR: it's not a plane

TOY EXEC: oh...Kay, so it's

INVENTOR: its a little red wagon

TOY EXEC: with ... a radio on it?

INVENTOR: theres no radio
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dumbdum.bsky.social
Dumbdum @dumbdum.bsky.social · 4d
Just thinking about Mandy Patinkin
dumbdum.bsky.social
Dumbdum @dumbdum.bsky.social · 4d
Pacifica, CA.
A castle on the coast. Pacifica, CA. Late afternoon.
dumbdum.bsky.social
Dumbdum @dumbdum.bsky.social · 4d
I would expect you to come up with anything insightful or funny, so just keep doing what you’re doing stooge. What team wants to get rid of 50 mil worth of ball to get this fucking moron. 85 IQ gonna 85 IQ I guess. Good luck being…
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dumbdum.bsky.social
Dumbdum @dumbdum.bsky.social · 4d
Raptors. Get him out the country.
1
dumbdum.bsky.social
Dumbdum @dumbdum.bsky.social · 4d
No good team wants him. Or what they’d have to give to get him.
1
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garymuppet.bsky.social
Gary Muppet @garymuppet.bsky.social · 5d
The next day, Gary just threw out some straw and rearranged his jack-o’-lanterns into a nativity scene.
3 12 38
dumbdum.bsky.social
Dumbdum @dumbdum.bsky.social · 5d
I made the adult version It Came in Outer Space.
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dumbdum.bsky.social
Dumbdum @dumbdum.bsky.social · 5d
I made the adult version It Came in Outer Space.
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dumbdum.bsky.social
Dumbdum @dumbdum.bsky.social · 6d
I’ve been throwing pennys in the garbage for years. Not sorry.
1 1
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craigpsutton.bsky.social
Criag @craigpsutton.bsky.social · 6d
I'm telling you, save a ton of money by getting $2 bills. You're at a restaurant and you gotta tip. But what would the waiter rather have? A boring 20% tip? Or a brand new crisp $2 bill? The value of the novelty alone is worth the monetary reduction!
1 1 6
Reposted by Dumbdum
splendidhobo.bsky.social
Splendid Hobo @splendidhobo.bsky.social · 7d
I was the bubble king in my neighborhood. I’d make balloon animals out of bubbles, they’d help the mailman with deliveries, they’d rescue cats stuck in trees. They’d get picked for touch football games. They made them sturdy back then, sturdy enough to lift a toddler. It was a different time, man.
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dumbdum.bsky.social
Dumbdum @dumbdum.bsky.social · 6d
You are a very unserious person. I feel sorry for you.
Reposted by Dumbdum
massdude.bsky.social
Mass Dude @massdude.bsky.social · 8d
Gonna keep pretending that the Offspring lyric “You gotta keep ‘em separated” was about the McDLT.
1 7 32
Reposted by Dumbdum
ceejoyner.bsky.social
Ceej @ceejoyner.bsky.social · Dec 17
this cape is reversible but my decision to wear it to the custody hearing is not.
11 190 1.6K
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tobestewart.bsky.social
Toby 🇵🇸 @tobestewart.bsky.social · 8d
I love people-watching but absolutely no closer
1 5 7
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thatbrenna.bsky.social
Pandy Fackler @thatbrenna.bsky.social · 8d
Therapist: I want you to know that you will be heard here. I want you to feel seen

Ninja patient: *starts panicking*
10 33
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wilboo72.bsky.social
Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 9d
There’s a kid in Africa that I feed for just $1 a day.

In related news, I miss my son.
1 6 15
Reposted by Dumbdum
dvsblast.bsky.social
DVS @dvsblast.bsky.social · 9d
ballot proposals are sick cuz theyre like "this would allow the city to make it so things are nice instead of bad, and everyone gets a balloon"

but then u see a guy screamin VOTE NO ON THE BALLOONS!! IT MAKES IT LEGAL FOR POLICE TO BITE U!!

not nice how they dont say that part
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dumbdum.bsky.social
Dumbdum @dumbdum.bsky.social · 10d
Fuck that guy.
1
dumbdum.bsky.social
Dumbdum @dumbdum.bsky.social · 10d
I’d rather fight a bear than be given change.
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