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Jackie Bouvier

@jackiebouvier.bsky.social

6.5K followers 720 following 3.1K posts

These are my jokes. Please don't laugh at them. My children: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:btj7htumgboprmobfodhw7wu/feed/aaaiisbbcciv6

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Jackie Bouvier @jackiebouvier.bsky.social · Nov 17

Therapist: Make yourself comfortable.
Me: If I could do that, I wouldn't be here.

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Reposted by Jackie Bouvier

Wendigo Wires 👻 @joparkerbear.bsky.social · 2d

Got really high and realized this is actually about the Democratic Party

Wendigo Wires 👻 @joparkerbear.bsky.social · Jul 14

In every single episode, the Scooby Doo gang discover a human is behind the mystery, not ghosts or mummies or whatever. Yet they begin each new case believing the villain is a supernatural being. Every time. Not once do they say “maybe it’s an old man like last time”

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Jackie Bouvier @jackiebouvier.bsky.social · 1d

I used capers tonight in your honor.

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Reposted by Jackie Bouvier

CrazyMyra @outonthemoors.bsky.social · 3d

You should be legally obliged to have the same avi and/or handle across all social media apps.

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Reposted by Jackie Bouvier

Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · Oct 10

This day in history. 1991. At a New Jersey post office Joe Harris shot 2 co-workers after killing his supervisor with a sword insisting to reporters "I went Ninja not postal get it right.”

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Reposted by Jackie Bouvier

Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 1d

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do scrapbooking.

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Jackie Bouvier @jackiebouvier.bsky.social · 1d

Love that song. ❤️

Reposted by Jackie Bouvier

Brick's 𝕳𝖆𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 House 🍁🎃 @brickmahoney.bsky.social · 1d

Solsbury Hill came on and I wrote a complete 90s romcom in 4 minutes

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Reposted by Jackie Bouvier

CrazyMyra @outonthemoors.bsky.social · 2d

Social media is just this century's boarding school, where kids get shipped off to "build character" and stay out of their parents' hair.

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Reposted by Jackie Bouvier

Julie Lavender Menace @2tickytacky.bsky.social · 3d

Be sure to come to my book signing! Today, I'll be signing "It", by Stephen King. Next week, I'll be signing the owner's manual to my 2006 Honda.

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Reposted by Jackie Bouvier

Dreamer @elgatoesmio.bsky.social · 2d

how do you get over the heartache of an ex whose cat you’ll never see again?

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Jackie Bouvier @jackiebouvier.bsky.social · 1d

They always give us like six fortune cookies and there are three of us. 😂

Reposted by Jackie Bouvier

Forrest Plump @nahyoudoit.bsky.social · 5d

Did it hurt?

When you ordered Chinese for yourself but they included 3 forks and fortune cookies?

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Not JPo @notjpo.bsky.social · 4d

Whenever you feel alone remember that there are a lot of people in your life that can barely tolerate you but they do anyway

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Reposted by Jackie Bouvier

Hi, it's Abby. Yep. @itsabbyyep.bsky.social · Sep 11

Just think: Before the internet, it would've taken days, weeks or even months to receive mountains of misinformation we get now in just minutes

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Jackie Bouvier @jackiebouvier.bsky.social · 1d

Precisely ❤️

Jackie Bouvier @jackiebouvier.bsky.social · 1d

I feel so free. Like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I literally just told her the truth. Wow.

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Jackie Bouvier @jackiebouvier.bsky.social · 1d

I just told my sister-in-law that I won't be going to my brother's birthday party because she'll be there and I don't like her. I'm sure she's currently picking her jaw up off the floor. I really believe I've gotten to an age where I literally cease to give a single fuck.