festive jules
@butch420.bsky.social
The judge said I have a “classy miss” demeanor <3
🇵🇸
🇵🇸
Reposted by festive jules
i feel special when no one likes my posts because that means i’m the only one who gets the joke 🤗
December 22, 2025 at 4:29 PM
i feel special when no one likes my posts because that means i’m the only one who gets the joke 🤗
Hallmark (2025)
Sad to say that is not a joke
Sad to say that is not a joke
Oy! To the world. 🎶
December 22, 2025 at 4:39 PM
Hallmark (2025)
Sad to say that is not a joke
Sad to say that is not a joke
How dare someone send me an email TODAY of all days.
-me every day
-me every day
December 22, 2025 at 4:36 PM
How dare someone send me an email TODAY of all days.
-me every day
-me every day
Whaat if I sat on the couch and ate cookies all day? What then? The world may never know. Until it does
December 22, 2025 at 4:35 PM
Whaat if I sat on the couch and ate cookies all day? What then? The world may never know. Until it does
Christmastime is the season for honesty. Here goes: my first few months here, I really thought @barmageddon.bsky.social was rob delaney
December 22, 2025 at 4:34 PM
Christmastime is the season for honesty. Here goes: my first few months here, I really thought @barmageddon.bsky.social was rob delaney
ATTENTION: KITTIES IN A CHRISTMAS TREE
Okay. I can’t help with the eating the tree. If you want suggestions for anchoring it, I’m your girl. I’ve currently got a tree up and 5
Foster kittens and it’s still up ;)
15-20 pounds on each side of the tree, and you’ll be fine.
Foster kittens and it’s still up ;)
15-20 pounds on each side of the tree, and you’ll be fine.
December 20, 2025 at 3:45 PM
ATTENTION: KITTIES IN A CHRISTMAS TREE
Reposted by festive jules
I have but one question for you all today.
Call it a philosophical inquiry, if you must.
Do not answer lightly. Search your soul before replying. And Godspeed to you all.
Call it a philosophical inquiry, if you must.
Do not answer lightly. Search your soul before replying. And Godspeed to you all.
December 19, 2025 at 10:38 PM
I have but one question for you all today.
Call it a philosophical inquiry, if you must.
Do not answer lightly. Search your soul before replying. And Godspeed to you all.
Call it a philosophical inquiry, if you must.
Do not answer lightly. Search your soul before replying. And Godspeed to you all.
Reposted by festive jules
All I want for Christmas is for every DC journalist to ask questions like this.
While a bunch of journalists were at the Kennedy Center taking pictures today, I asked the VP of Facilities and Operations at the Kennedy Center a direct question:
“Matt, is this the first time that you’ve defaced a public building?“
Only at Law Dork: www.lawdork.com/p/q-and-a-de...
“Matt, is this the first time that you’ve defaced a public building?“
Only at Law Dork: www.lawdork.com/p/q-and-a-de...
December 20, 2025 at 4:32 AM
All I want for Christmas is for every DC journalist to ask questions like this.
Let me not get put on a list. But come ON!
It’s a MEMORIAL for someone else that he’s shoving his name on
December 20, 2025 at 5:11 AM
Let me not get put on a list. But come ON!
Reposted by festive jules
December 18, 2025 at 7:15 AM
…bloody mary?
repost this if you want to live
December 20, 2025 at 4:55 AM
…bloody mary?
Reposted by festive jules
[weed dispensary]
me: are you guys hiring?
them: yes there
are job applicatio-
me: sorry not hire- higher
i wanna get more fucked up
me: are you guys hiring?
them: yes there
are job applicatio-
me: sorry not hire- higher
i wanna get more fucked up
December 20, 2025 at 4:41 AM
[weed dispensary]
me: are you guys hiring?
them: yes there
are job applicatio-
me: sorry not hire- higher
i wanna get more fucked up
me: are you guys hiring?
them: yes there
are job applicatio-
me: sorry not hire- higher
i wanna get more fucked up
Okay but Stuart little was such a good movie.
December 20, 2025 at 4:41 AM
Okay but Stuart little was such a good movie.
Reposted by festive jules
the *click, click, click* up on the rooftop is santa flicking his bic to rip a bowl
December 19, 2025 at 9:47 PM
the *click, click, click* up on the rooftop is santa flicking his bic to rip a bowl
What a good tweet for me to find out Rob Delaney is on here.
December 20, 2025 at 4:14 AM
What a good tweet for me to find out Rob Delaney is on here.
It’s Apple Store vs homey cafe
I rlly hate the northeastern legal dispensaries. They’re like trench coat-y, “here’s your paper bag now git!” Meanwhile out west the dispos are decorated with pounds and pounds of weed. You can see and smell the product. In the NE the gummies are handed out in medical-y boxes. Gross!
December 20, 2025 at 3:13 AM
It’s Apple Store vs homey cafe
I rlly hate the northeastern legal dispensaries. They’re like trench coat-y, “here’s your paper bag now git!” Meanwhile out west the dispos are decorated with pounds and pounds of weed. You can see and smell the product. In the NE the gummies are handed out in medical-y boxes. Gross!
December 20, 2025 at 3:12 AM
I rlly hate the northeastern legal dispensaries. They’re like trench coat-y, “here’s your paper bag now git!” Meanwhile out west the dispos are decorated with pounds and pounds of weed. You can see and smell the product. In the NE the gummies are handed out in medical-y boxes. Gross!
I guess it’s only regional,, screw you East Hartford Chevy
Can we please ban that radio ad with (fake) trump threatening Santa with tariffs????
December 20, 2025 at 1:41 AM
I guess it’s only regional,, screw you East Hartford Chevy
Can we please ban that radio ad with (fake) trump threatening Santa with tariffs????
December 20, 2025 at 1:41 AM
Can we please ban that radio ad with (fake) trump threatening Santa with tariffs????
I’m deathly curious about how this interaction went down but I don’t talk to my ex anymore. I didn’t even think my brother would recognize her he’s a famously oblivious guy.
![Group chat called Fam
Person whose name is scribbled out in red: Just bumped into k [redacted]. She says hello to everyone !!
Dad: No way! Hello back.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:ufhazpgc3ygexfkwx63vrmpi/bafkreidy64w6hl6t7bfmt6ihay2lct6v3zecog2lclh6locgtiwni536ne@jpeg)
![Me: who’s that
Me: C [redacted] my ex?
Name scribbled: Yes](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:ufhazpgc3ygexfkwx63vrmpi/bafkreigwtjo6pbcpmcxszw7kuvcjhqi2ask3enoicyvlaj3yfhwgy25paq@jpeg)
December 20, 2025 at 1:35 AM
I’m deathly curious about how this interaction went down but I don’t talk to my ex anymore. I didn’t even think my brother would recognize her he’s a famously oblivious guy.
Reposted by festive jules
Asked my therapist if I could read his notes from our last session and it was just a drawing of him pushing me off a cliff and laughing
December 19, 2025 at 3:40 PM
Asked my therapist if I could read his notes from our last session and it was just a drawing of him pushing me off a cliff and laughing
Reposted by festive jules
And Tiny Tim, who did NOT get hired because he was a white male, died.
December 19, 2025 at 2:00 PM
And Tiny Tim, who did NOT get hired because he was a white male, died.
i shidded, i saw, i posted
i came, i saw, i shitposted
December 19, 2025 at 3:50 PM
i shidded, i saw, i posted
For anyone who swallowed poison and needs to vomit, see below image
December 19, 2025 at 3:41 PM
For anyone who swallowed poison and needs to vomit, see below image
Reposted by festive jules
They don't tell you this but the most difficult thing about being non-binary is not having a part to sing in "Hey Ya!"
December 30, 2023 at 3:44 PM
They don't tell you this but the most difficult thing about being non-binary is not having a part to sing in "Hey Ya!"