Dan the Architect 🎧
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hstarshot.bsky.social
Dan the Architect 🎧
@hstarshot.bsky.social
5.9K followers 250 following 420 posts
Fluent in sarcasm and writing my own shitposts. A very serious source of news. Huge fan of boneless potato skins and making music sometimes. Not here for politics. 🙃
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Follow back people that make you laugh and mute the ones that demand your outrage.
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
Oh, you thought witch trials were only in our past? Boy, do I have news for you!
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
Vampire: Master of Darkness (GG / SIMS / 1992)
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
Me: *pays 140 dollars*

Tim Meadows: get away Dewey! don’t eat that Panda Express Orange Chicken! you don’t want any of that shit! It’s delicious!

Me: *delighted* *pays 140 dollars*

Meadows: Dewey get out of here! Don’t eat the rangoons! You don’t want any of that shit!

Me: *delighted* *pays 140
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
if bsky tanks i guess i’ll go back to saying stupid, weird, uncomfortable things to various cashiers and waitstaff
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
SOME GUY IN THE 50'S: i bet aliens fly around outer space inside of big shiny saucers
EVERYONE ELSE: agreed, lock it in
If you help me achieve time travel, I’ll try and convince Lars to use literally any other snare.
Back in the day, I got a record store to break street date on a new Metallica album so I could listen to it that night.

Unfortunately though that album was St. Anger.
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
Contrary to myth, it's not bacteria that makes Komodo Dragons' mouths so dangerous. It's their biting sarcasm.
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
Taurus: Give yourself a little credit. Not everyone could screw up so badly in such a variety of ways.
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
every Big Online Discourse™ reads like a transcript of people yelling at each other simultaneously catching every 3-4 words the other person is saying and assuming they understood it right
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
Ah, you think shitposting is your ally? You merely adopted the shitpost. I was born in it, molded by it.
Ma’am this is classism. You thought you were better than that. 🙃
I have no idea the context but I like the gumption
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
If you're gonna arrest me you might as well arrest everyone who reposted it! Oh, you plan to? Oh dear
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
don't mean to get political, but my bones are haunted
Ma’am, I love dial-up. Please stop making cliches from the 1870s.
Yeah I made a dial-up modem comment because I knew it would bother her… it did but jokes on her… I love dial up 😂
Maam, I’ve reported you to the internet police. Please be ready to turn in your dial-up modem.
I have spent an extraordinary amount of time revving my car up to 88mph. Hoping I can go back and fix a few things.