🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
@jollyrobber.bsky.social
Thoughts from the dark side of a married man. It is what it is and I ain't shit. (Not) New & (Certainly Not) Improved
bsky.app/profile/jollyrobber.bsky.social/search
My Musings
https://tinyurl.com/2p9ruj7u
Best? Of
https://tinyurl.com/mry4284p
bsky.app/profile/jollyrobber.bsky.social/search
My Musings
https://tinyurl.com/2p9ruj7u
Best? Of
https://tinyurl.com/mry4284p
Pinned
Hell yes I'm recycling all my tweets on Bluesky. Why should I come up with new garbage when I already have this garbage?
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
If I one-up your one-up, am I two-up or doubled up?
February 16, 2026 at 6:52 PM
If I one-up your one-up, am I two-up or doubled up?
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
the gentlest of gentlemen don't even get out of bed
February 16, 2026 at 7:34 PM
the gentlest of gentlemen don't even get out of bed
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
hate when it gets in my hair
Love is just like maple syrup when you think about it
February 16, 2026 at 7:33 PM
hate when it gets in my hair
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
You guys will always be my drafts folder. (affectionately)
February 16, 2026 at 8:21 PM
You guys will always be my drafts folder. (affectionately)
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
Sometimes I don't know wtf is going on around here, but I know I'm not helping
February 16, 2026 at 8:13 PM
Sometimes I don't know wtf is going on around here, but I know I'm not helping
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
FRIEND WHO I HAVEN'T SEEN IN A WHILE: your kid's gotten so big! what is he, four?
ME: i have no idea what he's for
ME: i have no idea what he's for
February 16, 2026 at 8:37 PM
FRIEND WHO I HAVEN'T SEEN IN A WHILE: your kid's gotten so big! what is he, four?
ME: i have no idea what he's for
ME: i have no idea what he's for
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
They should make a Kraft Singles that taste like cheesecake so you can slap them on graham crackers & munch on those when the munchies call…
February 16, 2026 at 8:42 PM
They should make a Kraft Singles that taste like cheesecake so you can slap them on graham crackers & munch on those when the munchies call…
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
I'm the plot twist you weren't expecting, but now you can't put the book down, and I still might surprise you yet
February 16, 2026 at 12:36 PM
I'm the plot twist you weren't expecting, but now you can't put the book down, and I still might surprise you yet
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
I think we need a reboot of Idiocracy or better yet, a prequel...
January 31, 2025 at 6:59 PM
I think we need a reboot of Idiocracy or better yet, a prequel...
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
heard the weather man say the snow will be “easily plowable” … just like your mom, buddy
January 22, 2026 at 2:17 AM
heard the weather man say the snow will be “easily plowable” … just like your mom, buddy
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
me to literally anyone while driving: are you a douche or something? because you seem like a douche
January 24, 2026 at 10:14 PM
me to literally anyone while driving: are you a douche or something? because you seem like a douche
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
back on my bullshit (eating this entire box of cereal)
January 28, 2026 at 9:03 PM
back on my bullshit (eating this entire box of cereal)
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
edging (eating a bowl of cereal with a small spoon)
February 5, 2026 at 1:03 AM
edging (eating a bowl of cereal with a small spoon)
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
losing my fucking mind as a little treat
February 6, 2026 at 7:29 PM
losing my fucking mind as a little treat
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
saw today that some dude at work was born in 2001 & in my mind he was a newborn baby sitting at a desk using a laptop
February 12, 2026 at 10:33 PM
saw today that some dude at work was born in 2001 & in my mind he was a newborn baby sitting at a desk using a laptop
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
my drafts are fire & your drafts fucking suck
February 14, 2026 at 2:05 AM
my drafts are fire & your drafts fucking suck
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
everything in my life is falling apart but i’m gunna figure it out
February 15, 2026 at 1:42 AM
everything in my life is falling apart but i’m gunna figure it out
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
Me working on my drafts
February 15, 2026 at 5:30 PM
Me working on my drafts
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
She did nothing wrong!
February 14, 2026 at 4:03 PM
She did nothing wrong!
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
I guess I should do something....
*keeps scrolling*
*keeps scrolling*
February 16, 2026 at 2:13 PM
I guess I should do something....
*keeps scrolling*
*keeps scrolling*
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
Who up Killing They Mockingbird
Who’s up, Sun Also Rising?
Who up Wuthering They Heights
February 16, 2026 at 1:54 AM
Who up Killing They Mockingbird
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
Who up eyreing they Jane?
Who up Killing They Mockingbird
Who’s up, Sun Also Rising?
February 16, 2026 at 1:56 AM
Who up eyreing they Jane?
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
Who Up Greatin' They Gatsby?
Who up eyreing they Jane?
Who up Killing They Mockingbird
February 16, 2026 at 1:56 AM
Who Up Greatin' They Gatsby?
Reposted by 🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️
I’m just tryna James that giant peach
February 16, 2026 at 5:45 AM
I’m just tryna James that giant peach