banner
LightNews
jollyrobber.bsky.social
🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
@jollyrobber.bsky.social
5.6K followers 1.2K following 3.4K posts
Thoughts from the dark side of a married man. It is what it is and I ain't shit. (Not) New & (Certainly Not) Improved bsky.app/profile/jollyrobber.bsky.social/search My Musings https://tinyurl.com/2p9ruj7u Best? Of https://tinyurl.com/mry4284p
tinyurl.com
Posts Media Videos Starter Packs
Pinned
jollyrobber.bsky.social
🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️ @jollyrobber.bsky.social · Nov 15
Hell yes I'm recycling all my tweets on Bluesky. Why should I come up with new garbage when I already have this garbage?
17 190 560
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
buickmakane71.bsky.social
BuickMakane 🇧🇲🔥💨 @buickmakane71.bsky.social · 2d
The BeeGees were fascinating.

Eating disorders, drugs, drinking, sexual issues, swimming in air, blowing up flames in videos....
2 2
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
buickmakane71.bsky.social
BuickMakane 🇧🇲🔥💨 @buickmakane71.bsky.social · 4d
The only reason stores put xmas shit out this early is to distract you from the Epstein Files.
1 11 42
jollyrobber.bsky.social
🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️ @jollyrobber.bsky.social · 9h
@shitpostsintiaras.bsky.social
2
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wakeupangry.bsky.social
Jack @wakeupangry.bsky.social · 3d
Why buy the human when you can get the blood for free?

- gross vampires probably
1 22 51
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wakeupangry.bsky.social
Jack @wakeupangry.bsky.social · 2d
Nice
3 6 36
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wakeupangry.bsky.social
Jack @wakeupangry.bsky.social · 2d
I hope America lasts another 6 months because I JUST FUCKING GOT NINE INCH NAILS TICKETS 🤘
2 21 81
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wakeupangry.bsky.social
Jack @wakeupangry.bsky.social · 1d
Soft secession sounds like me a minute after sex.
5 32 78
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wakeupangry.bsky.social
Jack @wakeupangry.bsky.social · 1d
Please.. Mr. Christ was my father, call me Jesus.
1 13 25
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
hourlongsauce.bsky.social
It’s Dana, actually @hourlongsauce.bsky.social · 1d
Remember that time we all joined mastodon? Wait… we’re doing it again?
3 2 8
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wilboo72.bsky.social
Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 3d
Friend: What are you up to?
Me: Going to get glasses
Friend: What about after that?
Me: I’ll see
1 24 74
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wilboo72.bsky.social
Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 2d
Got out of bed

This day is off to a rocky start
6 19
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wilboo72.bsky.social
Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 2d
It’s easy to pick out a gynecologist, he’s the guy wearing his watch up near his elbow.
2 6 13
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wilboo72.bsky.social
Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 2d
Gross if literal:

Getting your shit together
4 12 40
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
beaveinflow.bsky.social
BEAVE @beaveinflow.bsky.social · 2d
Honestly shocked no one has written a hit song about my butthole yet.
32 36 150
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wilboo72.bsky.social
Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 1d
Was just sitting in my office cubicle just now when out of the blue a nearby woman exclaimed “No, I want the big one”.
3 10 17
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wilboo72.bsky.social
Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 1d
Still a good feeling
Image of the screen seen after winning online Solitaire with the bouncing cards
2 6 19
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wilboo72.bsky.social
Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 1d
I got in touch with my inner self today.

On a related note I need to buy stronger toilet paper.
1 11 23
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wilboo72.bsky.social
Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 1d
I’ve given this a lot of thought. Did a lot of soul searching, thinking about what’s best for me, and I’ve decided this will be my final skeet
.
.
.
.
.
.
for tonight
2 4 16
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wilboo72.bsky.social
Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 21h
Dildo Tofu

👇🏼

Meat substitute
6 21
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
wilboo72.bsky.social
Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 19h
Was reviewing a work spreadsheet and I’d entered the word ‘slode’ and tbh I can’t even figure out what real word I was going for.
1 7 17
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
blackstonejn.bsky.social
James Blackstone @blackstonejn.bsky.social · 10d
Fortune Teller: I see you being surrounded by beautiful women and lots of money.

Me: Golly gee, that sounds swell.

(many days later)

In line at the grocery store, no women in sight. The guy in front of me wearing a tracksuit audibly farts.

Me: Gotta remember to ask follow up questions next time.
3 8
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
blackstonejn.bsky.social
James Blackstone @blackstonejn.bsky.social · 8d
Bartender: What can I get you?

Me: Whiskey, neat. Make it a double.

Bartender: That’s a mighty strong drink order there. Something on your mind?

Me with an anvil strapped to my head: You could say so.
5 12
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
blackstonejn.bsky.social
James Blackstone @blackstonejn.bsky.social · 7d
If you play Taylor Swift’s new album backwards it syncs up with the Wizard of Oz.
4 7
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
blackstonejn.bsky.social
James Blackstone @blackstonejn.bsky.social · 6d
Nice try clickbait ad. Mice are pretty smart. Fairly certain they won’t just drink bleach. Scrolling on.
A picture of a mouse and a bottle of bleach with the words “Do you have mice in your house? Do this.”
2 2 6
Reposted by 🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️
grilldcheese.bsky.social
grilled cheese 🧀 @grilldcheese.bsky.social · 17h
the best human on the planet can't compete with a halfway decent dog. would you pick up the best human's shit for them? the defense rests.
5 33 120