Reposted by mindflakes
i don’t think it’s appropriate that old people are my age
January 19, 2026 at 1:15 PM
i don’t think it’s appropriate that old people are my age
Reposted by mindflakes
contrary to what you might think the name "toadstool" came first. and then they had to come up with a creature who would sit on such a mushroom. cue the perfect frog
January 19, 2026 at 5:32 AM
contrary to what you might think the name "toadstool" came first. and then they had to come up with a creature who would sit on such a mushroom. cue the perfect frog
Reposted by mindflakes
asking my cats if they think they could get on board with a beautiful magical breakfast
January 18, 2026 at 4:57 PM
asking my cats if they think they could get on board with a beautiful magical breakfast
Everybody loves it when I put double-sided tape on my hands and feet and skitter about on the ceiling like a lizard
January 18, 2026 at 8:04 PM
Everybody loves it when I put double-sided tape on my hands and feet and skitter about on the ceiling like a lizard
Reposted by mindflakes
Early humans must have been so hungry before the invention of food
January 18, 2026 at 2:27 AM
Early humans must have been so hungry before the invention of food
Reposted by mindflakes
Shout out to everyone currently experiencing everything
January 18, 2026 at 4:01 AM
Shout out to everyone currently experiencing everything
Reposted by mindflakes
I hate when you’re buying weapons-grade uranium and the guy is like “What are you gonna use it for?” None of your business
May 1, 2025 at 3:23 PM
I hate when you’re buying weapons-grade uranium and the guy is like “What are you gonna use it for?” None of your business
Reposted by mindflakes
Seems unfair that you only get to use the bouncy slide to get off a plane when things have gone wrong. The bouncy slide should be a treat they give to the best passengers who did the flight correctly.
January 17, 2026 at 4:17 PM
Seems unfair that you only get to use the bouncy slide to get off a plane when things have gone wrong. The bouncy slide should be a treat they give to the best passengers who did the flight correctly.
I didn't even get an invite to my cat's coronation ceremony. After everything I did to facilitate her ascension.
January 17, 2026 at 6:39 PM
I didn't even get an invite to my cat's coronation ceremony. After everything I did to facilitate her ascension.
Reposted by mindflakes
I’m approaching forty years of age and have been starting to get those unfamiliar pangs, that feeling that I have to reach the south pole by sled
January 17, 2026 at 4:09 PM
I’m approaching forty years of age and have been starting to get those unfamiliar pangs, that feeling that I have to reach the south pole by sled
Reposted by mindflakes
When a car beeps at another car and that car does a little beep back I know they’re mad at each other but it sounds like they’re friends
January 17, 2026 at 1:52 AM
When a car beeps at another car and that car does a little beep back I know they’re mad at each other but it sounds like they’re friends
Compressing 135 hot dogs into a very small but incredibly dense ball and eating it on the bus like an apple
January 17, 2026 at 5:53 PM
Compressing 135 hot dogs into a very small but incredibly dense ball and eating it on the bus like an apple
Reposted by mindflakes
One single pan-fried calorie on a bed of thinly sliced cabbage
January 16, 2026 at 8:00 PM
One single pan-fried calorie on a bed of thinly sliced cabbage
Reposted by mindflakes
It’s the height of citrus season*, so a perfect time to walk up to an enemy’s desk & place a blood orange on it, slice it swiftly in half with a kitchen knife, & then walk away.
January 16, 2026 at 4:06 PM
It’s the height of citrus season*, so a perfect time to walk up to an enemy’s desk & place a blood orange on it, slice it swiftly in half with a kitchen knife, & then walk away.
Reposted by mindflakes
Note: A previous version of this article referred to the subject in a disparaging tone. The author has since developed loving-kindness for all sentient beings and revised the article accordingly.
November 6, 2025 at 9:37 PM
Note: A previous version of this article referred to the subject in a disparaging tone. The author has since developed loving-kindness for all sentient beings and revised the article accordingly.
My cats have made a habit of switching to german whenever I enter the room. Little do they know I've been learning german in anticipation of this very scenario. Not liking what I've heard so far
January 16, 2026 at 11:50 PM
My cats have made a habit of switching to german whenever I enter the room. Little do they know I've been learning german in anticipation of this very scenario. Not liking what I've heard so far
Reposted by mindflakes
Any time I walk into someone's apartment or house for the first time, I freeze right after entering, get very serious, and finally say in a hushed voice "Something unspeakable happened here."
January 15, 2026 at 10:44 PM
Any time I walk into someone's apartment or house for the first time, I freeze right after entering, get very serious, and finally say in a hushed voice "Something unspeakable happened here."
Reposted by mindflakes
Before the rest of the diving team descend, I like to go down and rearrange the fish. I think the fish are very convincing when arranged this way, and quite pleasing to the eye. I'm hoping this will stir a love of nature in my colleagues, who often lambast me for having a tender heart
January 14, 2026 at 11:09 PM
Before the rest of the diving team descend, I like to go down and rearrange the fish. I think the fish are very convincing when arranged this way, and quite pleasing to the eye. I'm hoping this will stir a love of nature in my colleagues, who often lambast me for having a tender heart
Reposted by mindflakes
If I have ever liked more than 3 of your posts it means I secretly want us to open a paranormal detective agency together. Surprised how many of you aren't getting the hint.
December 17, 2024 at 4:03 PM
If I have ever liked more than 3 of your posts it means I secretly want us to open a paranormal detective agency together. Surprised how many of you aren't getting the hint.
Reposted by mindflakes
Found a hat that flies around the room making crazy whirring sounds when I throw it in the air before circling back and landing perfectly back on my head. Coworkers are gonna love this
January 16, 2026 at 12:43 AM
Found a hat that flies around the room making crazy whirring sounds when I throw it in the air before circling back and landing perfectly back on my head. Coworkers are gonna love this
Reposted by mindflakes
What's the situation on the ground? There's some bugs. Dirt. Pretty much what you'd expect.
January 16, 2026 at 4:17 AM
What's the situation on the ground? There's some bugs. Dirt. Pretty much what you'd expect.
Does anyone want to head down to the apothecary and check out the latest potions
January 15, 2026 at 9:54 PM
Does anyone want to head down to the apothecary and check out the latest potions
Reposted by mindflakes
I’m such a private person that it’s none of my business what I’m up to.
June 4, 2025 at 1:20 AM
I’m such a private person that it’s none of my business what I’m up to.
Reposted by mindflakes
When someone says I’m wrong I just say “nuh uh” and then they change their mind
August 22, 2024 at 3:05 PM
When someone says I’m wrong I just say “nuh uh” and then they change their mind
Up to 40% of likes on my posts are caused by people trying to wipe honey mustard sauce off their screen
January 15, 2026 at 7:08 PM
Up to 40% of likes on my posts are caused by people trying to wipe honey mustard sauce off their screen