Jasper J. Jaspers
@jaspers47.bsky.social
Trying to reclaim the number 47. It's not going well.
Mostly movie opinions and lefty snark
https://letterboxd.com/ajaspers47/
Mostly movie opinions and lefty snark
https://letterboxd.com/ajaspers47/
Pinned
Jasper J. Jaspers
@jaspers47.bsky.social
· Jan 20
I apologize in advance to all y'all, I'm going to be spending the next four years Tweeting through this
Reposted by Jasper J. Jaspers
pals you gotta quit spotify
December 8, 2025 at 4:44 PM
pals you gotta quit spotify
Ketchup... Catsup... Ketchup... Catsup...
I'm in way over my head
I'm in way over my head
December 8, 2025 at 9:08 PM
Ketchup... Catsup... Ketchup... Catsup...
I'm in way over my head
I'm in way over my head
There's an episode of The Wonder Years where Kevin's parents are feeling down on themselves, so they decide to throw a Christmas party like the kind they used to years before.
Except now food is too expensive, they're estranged from their friends, and their job/responsibilities sap all their energy
Except now food is too expensive, they're estranged from their friends, and their job/responsibilities sap all their energy
Terminally online Right wingers are telling on themselves
December 8, 2025 at 8:01 PM
There's an episode of The Wonder Years where Kevin's parents are feeling down on themselves, so they decide to throw a Christmas party like the kind they used to years before.
Except now food is too expensive, they're estranged from their friends, and their job/responsibilities sap all their energy
Except now food is too expensive, they're estranged from their friends, and their job/responsibilities sap all their energy
The Golden Globes once again demonstrating the "Comedy/Musical" designation doesn't mean anything at all, and is just used for spillover
December 8, 2025 at 5:52 PM
The Golden Globes once again demonstrating the "Comedy/Musical" designation doesn't mean anything at all, and is just used for spillover
Reposted by Jasper J. Jaspers
Born on this day in 1943, Happy Birthday, MARY WORONOV! 🎉
December 8, 2025 at 3:33 PM
Born on this day in 1943, Happy Birthday, MARY WORONOV! 🎉
Reposted by Jasper J. Jaspers
04 Dec 2025
December 5, 2025 at 7:49 PM
04 Dec 2025
Teach media literacy in schools
December 4, 2025 at 11:38 PM
Teach media literacy in schools
Heard on the radio what I thought was Jack Black doing a sincere version of Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas, but in his trademark overwrought vocal styling.
It was Sam Smith.
It was Sam Smith.
December 4, 2025 at 6:12 PM
Heard on the radio what I thought was Jack Black doing a sincere version of Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas, but in his trademark overwrought vocal styling.
It was Sam Smith.
It was Sam Smith.
My nephew doesn't understand why I insist we watch commercials for Pepsi, American Airlines, and a trailer for Ferngully: The Last Rainforest before we watch Home Alone. The youth have no respect for Christmas traditions.
December 4, 2025 at 5:29 PM
My nephew doesn't understand why I insist we watch commercials for Pepsi, American Airlines, and a trailer for Ferngully: The Last Rainforest before we watch Home Alone. The youth have no respect for Christmas traditions.
Reposted by Jasper J. Jaspers
Here’s my Spotify Wrapped 🎵✨
December 3, 2025 at 4:51 PM
Here’s my Spotify Wrapped 🎵✨
If there was one Filmbro I would have expected to have Oldboy in his top ten...
like if you told me this list was “all-time best selling discs at walmart locations” i’d be like hmm yeah makes sense
December 4, 2025 at 3:38 AM
If there was one Filmbro I would have expected to have Oldboy in his top ten...
Reposted by Jasper J. Jaspers
99% of complaints about things being better in the past boil down to "you miss not having adult responsibilities". The other 1% is that everything is manufactured to break after two years now.
Because you're an adult you fucking muppet. You gotta pay the magic forward.
December 3, 2025 at 5:48 PM
99% of complaints about things being better in the past boil down to "you miss not having adult responsibilities". The other 1% is that everything is manufactured to break after two years now.
Reposted by Jasper J. Jaspers
Year-end critics’ lists exist for people to fight over, so I’m happy when people complain about them. But the complaint I will never get is, “I’ve never heard of most of these movies/albums/shows.” Yes, and? Why be mad about learning about stuff you didn’t know before from the news?
December 2, 2025 at 11:53 PM
Year-end critics’ lists exist for people to fight over, so I’m happy when people complain about them. But the complaint I will never get is, “I’ve never heard of most of these movies/albums/shows.” Yes, and? Why be mad about learning about stuff you didn’t know before from the news?
People, I don't want to see a "Year in Review" from any site, platform or service until we enter that week after Christmas but before New Year's.
There's still a month left. Statistics don't mean anything if 8.33% of sample data is occluded.
There's still a month left. Statistics don't mean anything if 8.33% of sample data is occluded.
December 3, 2025 at 7:34 AM
People, I don't want to see a "Year in Review" from any site, platform or service until we enter that week after Christmas but before New Year's.
There's still a month left. Statistics don't mean anything if 8.33% of sample data is occluded.
There's still a month left. Statistics don't mean anything if 8.33% of sample data is occluded.
The Knives Out sequels keep naming themselves after Beatles lyrics, ergo there will eventually be a movie named after "Everybody's Got Something to Hide Except For Me and My Monkey"
Logically, they'd only use the first half of the title, but I'd love to see Benoit Blanc vs Gordy the Chimp
Logically, they'd only use the first half of the title, but I'd love to see Benoit Blanc vs Gordy the Chimp
December 3, 2025 at 6:42 AM
The Knives Out sequels keep naming themselves after Beatles lyrics, ergo there will eventually be a movie named after "Everybody's Got Something to Hide Except For Me and My Monkey"
Logically, they'd only use the first half of the title, but I'd love to see Benoit Blanc vs Gordy the Chimp
Logically, they'd only use the first half of the title, but I'd love to see Benoit Blanc vs Gordy the Chimp
Sources also report, "Hey, it says 'Gullible' on the ceiling."
Exclusive: Netflix, Warner Bros Discovery combo seen lowering costs for consumers, sources say reut.rs/4pGfxEj
Exclusive: Netflix, Warner Bros Discovery combo seen lowering costs for consumers, sources say
Netflix's proposed acquisition of Warner Bros Discovery's studios and streaming unit is expected to reduce streaming costs for consumers by bundling Netflix and HBO Max, according to two people familiar with the proposal.
reut.rs
December 3, 2025 at 6:02 AM
Sources also report, "Hey, it says 'Gullible' on the ceiling."
Chintzy, hullabaloo, germane, enumerate, distraught, viscous, antimony, elocution, shamble, filigree, blight, kinkajou, manacle, hazier, codger, goldbrick, pomelo, silversmith, brasserie, taupe, molasses, hydrocortisone, gingham, insertion, ethanol, cataclysm, shale, hemidemisemiquaver, roan
December 3, 2025 at 1:30 AM
Chintzy, hullabaloo, germane, enumerate, distraught, viscous, antimony, elocution, shamble, filigree, blight, kinkajou, manacle, hazier, codger, goldbrick, pomelo, silversmith, brasserie, taupe, molasses, hydrocortisone, gingham, insertion, ethanol, cataclysm, shale, hemidemisemiquaver, roan
It's that time of year again, when I have to tell myself both "It's just snow. The entire city's not going to shut down over a little precipitation" and "Aaaagh! Nobody knows how to drive! He's going 80! She's straddling two lanes! Nobody can see the lines in the parking lot; every man for himself!"
December 1, 2025 at 7:05 PM
It's that time of year again, when I have to tell myself both "It's just snow. The entire city's not going to shut down over a little precipitation" and "Aaaagh! Nobody knows how to drive! He's going 80! She's straddling two lanes! Nobody can see the lines in the parking lot; every man for himself!"
Honestly, the funniest part of Zootopia 2 is the credits
December 1, 2025 at 2:37 AM
Honestly, the funniest part of Zootopia 2 is the credits
Reposted by Jasper J. Jaspers
Withnail and I is a Thanksgiving movie, I’ve decided. It’s cold and rainy but clearly not the dead of winter, they go to a relative’s house, they have an unwanted visitor, they cook a bird…
November 26, 2025 at 10:03 PM
Withnail and I is a Thanksgiving movie, I’ve decided. It’s cold and rainy but clearly not the dead of winter, they go to a relative’s house, they have an unwanted visitor, they cook a bird…
Thinking about reworking my ethical stand on Buy Nothing Day to exclude locally-owned small businesses, especially since Black Friday has a significantly reduced presence in a post-pandemic world
But it's not coming from a genuine place as I just want an excuse to go to the movies.
But it's not coming from a genuine place as I just want an excuse to go to the movies.
November 28, 2025 at 6:27 PM
Thinking about reworking my ethical stand on Buy Nothing Day to exclude locally-owned small businesses, especially since Black Friday has a significantly reduced presence in a post-pandemic world
But it's not coming from a genuine place as I just want an excuse to go to the movies.
But it's not coming from a genuine place as I just want an excuse to go to the movies.
Everyone today is going to be talking about that episode of WKRP where they drop a bunch of turkeys from a helicopter.
I will break from the crowd and talk about the episode of Saved By the Bell: The College Years, featuring cameos by Jonathan Brandis, Brian Austin Green, and Jenna Von Oy
I will break from the crowd and talk about the episode of Saved By the Bell: The College Years, featuring cameos by Jonathan Brandis, Brian Austin Green, and Jenna Von Oy
November 27, 2025 at 2:41 PM
Everyone today is going to be talking about that episode of WKRP where they drop a bunch of turkeys from a helicopter.
I will break from the crowd and talk about the episode of Saved By the Bell: The College Years, featuring cameos by Jonathan Brandis, Brian Austin Green, and Jenna Von Oy
I will break from the crowd and talk about the episode of Saved By the Bell: The College Years, featuring cameos by Jonathan Brandis, Brian Austin Green, and Jenna Von Oy
Reposted by Jasper J. Jaspers
Look kids! It’s Ask Jeeves! Over here Jeeves!
November 26, 2025 at 8:26 PM
Look kids! It’s Ask Jeeves! Over here Jeeves!
Reposted by Jasper J. Jaspers
“Poor people have a right to art!”
They sure do. So get to it.
They sure do. So get to it.
November 26, 2025 at 6:15 PM
“Poor people have a right to art!”
They sure do. So get to it.
They sure do. So get to it.
Reposted by Jasper J. Jaspers
I just learned the Bugs Bunny No meme doesn't even come from him saying no. It's a frame rotated 90 degrees from him taking a drink from a bottle. I needed to share this.
November 25, 2025 at 3:20 AM
I just learned the Bugs Bunny No meme doesn't even come from him saying no. It's a frame rotated 90 degrees from him taking a drink from a bottle. I needed to share this.