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Frightening McQueen

@lettuce.bsky.social

4.1K followers 670 following 1.8K posts

Bleh My posts: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:iospu3tavlzqplkpbgpiz6nb/feed/aaafjks2ddefk

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Frightening McQueen @lettuce.bsky.social · Nov 7

[after learning about how muscles work] oh so we're marionettes from the inside

2 21 110

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Santana Abraxas @slime-golem.biz · 2h

2 58 440

Frightening McQueen @lettuce.bsky.social · 10h

🎄😑

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Cap’n Watsisname @capnwatsisname.bsky.social · 13d

Sitting on the porch all day peeling and pitting a whole family size bag of peanut m&ms

13 73 280

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Travis comma bitch @prof-hinkley.bsky.social · 1d

One look at a modern day airplane cockpit would kill Wilbur and Orville Wright instantly

3 4 29

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Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 2d

When house hunting, you must learn to think like the house. “I sure hate fire,” etc.

5 19

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mindflakes @mindflakes.bsky.social · 16h

Convince your neighbors you own a pet owl by yelling "has anyone seen my pet owl" through their letterbox at 4am

2 40 240

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mave @mave.bsky.social · 19h

you are kidding yourself if you carry a flickering lantern along the winding path through the dark woods and think that the approaching thunderous hoofbeats signal the arrival of anyone other than the inimitable headless horseman

12 65 360

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lukelukeluke @lukelukeluke.bsky.social · Dec 28

Mushroom spore landing in my lungs: I eat?

My immune system: no not right now he’s still alive

Mushroom spore: ok i wait

41 400 2.4K

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furby hancock @furbyhancock.bsky.social · 2d

making you stand and wait while i look for a specific guy in the garden of earthly delights on my phone

2 26 110

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Blue sky nice guy @rajandelman.bsky.social · 2d

Died and went to the level of hell where everything is controlled by rube goldberg machines. If you want a cup of coffee, get ready to wait for the match to light under a basket of billiard balls. I wish I'd lived a good life

2 7 71

Frightening McQueen @lettuce.bsky.social · 2d

Wonderful. My aromatic aster is the only thing blooming right now, I clearly need to get to work

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josh (oldfriend99) @oldfriend99.bsky.social · 2d

As someone who likes to joke around, comedies often hit a little too close to home

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Frightening McQueen @lettuce.bsky.social · 2d

Nobody's any years should be like this

1 1

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Keanu_reevebooks @jamesgameboy.bsky.social · 3d

*prince voice* little moist towelette

9 58 340

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lanyardigan @lanyardigan.bsky.social · 3d

UNCONVENTIONAL: This woman ran out of hot dog buns and is having hot dog on a hamburger bun. She must manipulate its form. Hot dog reborn

10 31 290

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eli yudin @eliyudin.com · Aug 22

STEVE HARVEY: something with 8 legs you don’t want to see in your bedroom
ME, BUZZING IN IMMEDIATELY: 4 men fucking my wife

23 560 2.5K

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Jess @ennui-haver.bsky.social · 3d

in therapy, bells go off, the room lights up, the ceiling is flashing different colors, I'm actually in Cash Therapy the only show where you compete in therapy for real cash prizes