Tim Price
@timprice.bsky.social
Right-handed lefty writer. Former think tank inmate. Most run-over Staten Islander of 2008 (Nominated)
Reposted by Tim Price
www.nybooks.com/articles/202... i'm trying to read this essay but i keep getting stuck on that bill's name
December 7, 2025 at 8:25 PM
www.nybooks.com/articles/202... i'm trying to read this essay but i keep getting stuck on that bill's name
Scene: American Nuremberg trials, 2029
Bailiff: Last one on the docket today, your honor, but it’s a doozy.
Judge: (reading paper as a smile slowly creeps over his face) The man who did the ad buy for the Meghan Trainor State Farm commercial. Yes. Bring him in. Leave the shackles on.
Bailiff: Last one on the docket today, your honor, but it’s a doozy.
Judge: (reading paper as a smile slowly creeps over his face) The man who did the ad buy for the Meghan Trainor State Farm commercial. Yes. Bring him in. Leave the shackles on.
December 7, 2025 at 8:23 PM
Scene: American Nuremberg trials, 2029
Bailiff: Last one on the docket today, your honor, but it’s a doozy.
Judge: (reading paper as a smile slowly creeps over his face) The man who did the ad buy for the Meghan Trainor State Farm commercial. Yes. Bring him in. Leave the shackles on.
Bailiff: Last one on the docket today, your honor, but it’s a doozy.
Judge: (reading paper as a smile slowly creeps over his face) The man who did the ad buy for the Meghan Trainor State Farm commercial. Yes. Bring him in. Leave the shackles on.
I know my guy was clip-clopping
December 7, 2025 at 8:15 PM
I know my guy was clip-clopping
If you change your display name and your avatar at the same time you have fully regenerated into a new person to me
December 7, 2025 at 8:02 PM
If you change your display name and your avatar at the same time you have fully regenerated into a new person to me
Illin’ Worm Man is at it again
December 7, 2025 at 7:53 PM
Illin’ Worm Man is at it again
Reposted by Tim Price
Glad I saved this by @longwall26.bsky.social
December 7, 2025 at 7:06 PM
Glad I saved this by @longwall26.bsky.social
There’s a type of plastic surgery a lot of older celebrities get that turns them into the claymation version of themselves and Stallone looks like he got it twice.
Pictured (L-R): Sylvester Stallone, apparently stung by an entire beehive; Paul Stanley, revealing that the KISS makeup was load bearing; and Donald Trump, recently poisoned by the Joker
December 7, 2025 at 7:32 PM
There’s a type of plastic surgery a lot of older celebrities get that turns them into the claymation version of themselves and Stallone looks like he got it twice.
Just remembered the time I told a couple of my non-ball-knowing coworkers that I had a bye week coming up and they thought I was announcing my decision to experiment sexually
December 7, 2025 at 7:23 PM
Just remembered the time I told a couple of my non-ball-knowing coworkers that I had a bye week coming up and they thought I was announcing my decision to experiment sexually
Reposted by Tim Price
Don't think I've ever heard anything good said in a two shot that looks like this
December 7, 2025 at 7:19 PM
Don't think I've ever heard anything good said in a two shot that looks like this
Reposted by Tim Price
A repost of a Bluesky post of an Instagram post quoting a tweet, this is the online equivalent of pink slime
December 7, 2025 at 7:13 PM
A repost of a Bluesky post of an Instagram post quoting a tweet, this is the online equivalent of pink slime
I do think we could get more use out of this one when we’re being condescending. This should obsolete sweet summer child
December 7, 2025 at 7:13 PM
I do think we could get more use out of this one when we’re being condescending. This should obsolete sweet summer child
If there’s no flag on the play, it means your haters aren’t paying attention
December 7, 2025 at 6:53 PM
If there’s no flag on the play, it means your haters aren’t paying attention
Reposted by Tim Price
My favorite thing is that they asked his mom and she was like yeah I have no idea what the fuck he’s talking about
December 7, 2025 at 6:50 PM
My favorite thing is that they asked his mom and she was like yeah I have no idea what the fuck he’s talking about
Very funny in a bittersweet way how people keep generating AI videos of cops standing up to ICE because there are no real examples of that happening. It’s like asking Sora to show you your grandpa kicking your dad’s ass.
December 7, 2025 at 6:33 PM
Very funny in a bittersweet way how people keep generating AI videos of cops standing up to ICE because there are no real examples of that happening. It’s like asking Sora to show you your grandpa kicking your dad’s ass.
I see. And will they be checking it twice
🚨Pam Bondi is ordering the FBI to “compile a list" of Americans who may be extremists, per signed memo leaked to me:
www.kenklippenstein.com/p/leak-fbi-l...
www.kenklippenstein.com/p/leak-fbi-l...
LEAK: FBI List of “Extremists” Is Coming, Memo Reveals
Are you on Trump's naughty list?
www.kenklippenstein.com
December 7, 2025 at 5:15 AM
I see. And will they be checking it twice
That’s too much eye black man
December 7, 2025 at 5:03 AM
That’s too much eye black man
Reposted by Tim Price
Jon would listen to some fucked up podcasts that all I know
December 7, 2025 at 4:31 AM
Jon would listen to some fucked up podcasts that all I know
The idea that there must always be something you can find common ground on no matter how evil your enemy gets drags these eggheads into some very stupid positions.
Ezra Klein even like "well we can agree 'birth tourism' is a problem," and no, I cannot. My group texts are about sports and kids.
still poleaxed by the idea that you could oppose birthright citizenship and still think of yourself as a liberal in any sense of the term.
December 7, 2025 at 4:13 AM
The idea that there must always be something you can find common ground on no matter how evil your enemy gets drags these eggheads into some very stupid positions.
Reposted by Tim Price
Every piece of fiction made by Irish people set in Ireland: This place is riddled with incestuous rot. There is nothing here but decay and strip malls. We are a dying country. Observe us as you would cannibal rats in a cage and and stay far, far away.
Me, partaking: Gosh I'd love to visit Ireland
Me, partaking: Gosh I'd love to visit Ireland
December 7, 2025 at 3:26 AM
Every piece of fiction made by Irish people set in Ireland: This place is riddled with incestuous rot. There is nothing here but decay and strip malls. We are a dying country. Observe us as you would cannibal rats in a cage and and stay far, far away.
Me, partaking: Gosh I'd love to visit Ireland
Me, partaking: Gosh I'd love to visit Ireland
Reposted by Tim Price
How my homunculus pilfers the guard's keys when he breaks me out of the king's dungeon:
December 7, 2025 at 2:47 AM
How my homunculus pilfers the guard's keys when he breaks me out of the king's dungeon:
Reposted by Tim Price
There is no sight that more efficiently puts the lie to immigration “court” than the common sight of children “representing themselves.” Children too small to climb into the chair, children in pajamas who don’t know where they are, children not yet old enough to speak.
Three-year-old child forced to serve as her own attorney in Tucson immigration court
More than a dozen undocumented minors were forced to make their case in front of an immigration judge as the Trump administration ramps up removal proceedings.
coppercourier.com
December 6, 2025 at 5:18 PM
There is no sight that more efficiently puts the lie to immigration “court” than the common sight of children “representing themselves.” Children too small to climb into the chair, children in pajamas who don’t know where they are, children not yet old enough to speak.
Reposted by Tim Price
Reposted by Tim Price
Every new word in this sentence is worse than the last
December 6, 2025 at 11:29 PM
Every new word in this sentence is worse than the last
Reposted by Tim Price
it is very funny that after the second ghost Scrooge is like okay great I've got it. you can actually let me out here
December 7, 2025 at 12:08 AM
it is very funny that after the second ghost Scrooge is like okay great I've got it. you can actually let me out here
Moth Hunter Holland is back in action, but this week she has a new target: Christmas ribbons
December 6, 2025 at 11:27 PM
Moth Hunter Holland is back in action, but this week she has a new target: Christmas ribbons