@crisplettuce85.bsky.social
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plugging my tesla and my samsung galaxy 7 into the same charger and starting a conflagration that consumes the hemisphere
u should be able to plug ur phone into one of those ev stations and charge it fully in like 12 seconds
January 13, 2026 at 6:47 PM
plugging my tesla and my samsung galaxy 7 into the same charger and starting a conflagration that consumes the hemisphere
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The Highway Code rule 112b: LED headlights
![[Cartoon strip pastiche of the Highway Code, with illustrations describing the text]
[Title panel]:
The Highway Code
Rule number 112b:
LED headlights
In recent years, many
new cars have been fitted with extra-bright LED headlights.
LED headlights increase safety by illuminating every detail of the road ahead
Including the face of the person driving a metal box towards you at a combined speed of 80mph
Whom you have just blinded with your LED headlights.
LED headlights must be fitted at eye-level on a great big murderous wall of car.
[Show a car crumpling into the front of a high-fronted SUV, bathed in light from the blinding headlamps]
They must be permanently on full beam, because you are insane.
And they should be bright enough to make other drivers think they are ascending into a blinding vortex of alien light
Like them old people in the classic Ron Howard film, Cocoon (1985).
[Show illustration of the final scene where the older people on the boat are being yoinked up into the blindingly-illuminated cloaca of the big spaceship]
So remember: you must use LED headlights
To prevent everyone from not crashing into you.
[Image shows this happening]
[Ends]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4m3we4apbjayclzcnhwe3pfp/bafkreidg3mni5yt6nxmwoqrv66uzimyblbekeeffqwtclshd42bl2cr4qa@jpeg)
January 12, 2026 at 11:52 AM
The Highway Code rule 112b: LED headlights
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Remember when Timothée Chalamet packed two outfits for Cannes and they were Pokémon hero and Pokémon villain
February 19, 2025 at 5:32 PM
Remember when Timothée Chalamet packed two outfits for Cannes and they were Pokémon hero and Pokémon villain
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Let us curse the MAGNARP’s evil twin, the TÅGARP. Miserable, cheap lamp. Too tall and flimsy, wobbly, unflattering throw, a bane of apartments everywhere. A lamp that follows you like a generational curse.
January 11, 2026 at 5:09 AM
Let us curse the MAGNARP’s evil twin, the TÅGARP. Miserable, cheap lamp. Too tall and flimsy, wobbly, unflattering throw, a bane of apartments everywhere. A lamp that follows you like a generational curse.
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Samsung is the most True Neutral company because they create fantastic hardware and the process of interacting with any of it is pure evil.
January 5, 2026 at 5:45 PM
Samsung is the most True Neutral company because they create fantastic hardware and the process of interacting with any of it is pure evil.
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As news breaks please be mindful of how you post. Remember:
- the government would never lie to you
- double check all sources with your chiropractor/astrologist
- every tiktok is real
- the government would never lie to you
- double check all sources with your chiropractor/astrologist
- every tiktok is real
January 3, 2026 at 8:53 AM
As news breaks please be mindful of how you post. Remember:
- the government would never lie to you
- double check all sources with your chiropractor/astrologist
- every tiktok is real
- the government would never lie to you
- double check all sources with your chiropractor/astrologist
- every tiktok is real
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How to use ultra wide monitors for gaming
January 2, 2026 at 6:32 PM
How to use ultra wide monitors for gaming
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The way the crowd cheered when she said you best know me from the voice saying "please stand away from the platform edge"
Nice touch - the trans announcer from the subway (“Stand clear of the platform edge”) is doing the announcing
January 1, 2026 at 9:49 PM
The way the crowd cheered when she said you best know me from the voice saying "please stand away from the platform edge"
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Mom Wants To Know If You Could Use Grandma’s Antique, 12-Person Dining Room Table In Your Studio Apartment https://theonion.com/mom-wants-to-know-if-you-could-use-grandma-s-antique-1-1831765783/
January 1, 2026 at 9:00 PM
Mom Wants To Know If You Could Use Grandma’s Antique, 12-Person Dining Room Table In Your Studio Apartment https://theonion.com/mom-wants-to-know-if-you-could-use-grandma-s-antique-1-1831765783/
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happy birthday all horses (northern hemisphere)
January 1, 2026 at 8:29 AM
happy birthday all horses (northern hemisphere)
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One of the best to ever do it
December 30, 2025 at 2:09 PM
One of the best to ever do it
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I'm sorry to be pedantic here, but as holder of a doctorate in Massachusetts studies (unaccredited) I am forced to point out that we already have that in the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum heist.
December 29, 2025 at 10:18 PM
I'm sorry to be pedantic here, but as holder of a doctorate in Massachusetts studies (unaccredited) I am forced to point out that we already have that in the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum heist.
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![Comic. [Top panel: Long-necked dinosaur with red X over it.] [Bottom panel: two smaller dinosaurs the same shape except their neck isn’t long, while in the background there’s an extremely long neck criss-crossing the frame like a snake. Green check mark in center.] [caption] Thanks to modern paleontological reconstructions, we now know that most sauropods had short necks, and all those extra vertebrae belonged to the sauropod colony’s queen.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:cz73r7iyiqn26upot4jtjdhk/bafkreigjcepbb3hjlvpjzmj6msuydmem6gdakkl5svr4kh4q7qi3c4m2fu@jpeg)
December 29, 2025 at 9:11 PM
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This is very scary
teletubbies should have hooped instead of worshipping the sun baby cause they tall as hell
December 27, 2025 at 2:48 AM
This is very scary
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Maxwell and Fishwell
Naming one son Max and the other Fish is CRAZY work
Alright we got a cool NFL brother on our hands
December 26, 2025 at 12:53 AM
Maxwell and Fishwell
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On first glance this is an inspiring ad for drunk driving
August 25, 2025 at 8:05 PM
On first glance this is an inspiring ad for drunk driving
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Terrifying headline if you don’t realize they are sports teams.
December 19, 2025 at 4:37 PM
Terrifying headline if you don’t realize they are sports teams.
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Even though I know better I still believe Hors d'ouvres means "horse of eggs"
December 13, 2025 at 5:34 PM
Even though I know better I still believe Hors d'ouvres means "horse of eggs"
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If you want to communicate your idea to an artist all you need is 30 seconds and the basic ability to grip a pen
December 18, 2025 at 5:57 PM
If you want to communicate your idea to an artist all you need is 30 seconds and the basic ability to grip a pen
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"they don't know how to express the idea" here's rian johnson's storyboard for knives out
pick up a pencil and a napkin
pick up a pencil and a napkin
December 18, 2025 at 4:58 PM
"they don't know how to express the idea" here's rian johnson's storyboard for knives out
pick up a pencil and a napkin
pick up a pencil and a napkin
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Found the best named law ever on Jane Austen's wiki
December 18, 2025 at 8:28 AM
Found the best named law ever on Jane Austen's wiki