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dadback.bsky.social
I've got a dad back
@dadback.bsky.social
510 followers 390 following 1.4K posts
It's just jokes https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:vukmt5ibip7vl3a3ll4d37hb/feed/aaakqjbhan7bm
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dadback.bsky.social
I've got a dad back @dadback.bsky.social · Sep 2
Me: what is it with all these questions, are you a cop or something?

My bride: Father Timothy is not a cop, just say "I do" like we practiced
1
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bigthinkingcap.bsky.social
Bigthinkingcap @bigthinkingcap.bsky.social · 6d
so..
you’re wearing that for the armageddon?
Small dog with white and tan markings making a smile that looks as if saying You’re wearing that to the Armageddon
6 34 130
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bigthinkingcap.bsky.social
Bigthinkingcap @bigthinkingcap.bsky.social · 6d
Sshh,guys
Please
All this talk of doom is making my lover very sad
The Sun 0 @TheSun We'll be having sex with robots in the next 10 years thesun.uk/6016BzwMk A pic of a robot lover in bed with a partially naked female
10 24 59
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thatbrenna.bsky.social
Pandy Fackler 🎃 @thatbrenna.bsky.social · 1h
I just asked alexa if she loved me and she said no way in the nicest way possible
1 2 5
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johnlyon.bsky.social
John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 4h
Me: Is there something I could do differently to improve my sleep?

Doctor: I recommend not looking at your phone for at least an hour before bed.

Me: So nothing then.
4 39 140
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socialistboat.dad
jam @socialistboat.dad · 7h
"This website is free" No. This website comes at a terrible cost
1 710 3.8K
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lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com
lauren @lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · 12h
microsoft product (begging, pleading): save this document to my documents?

me: save to desktop

microsoft (twitching, shaking) this jpeg. save to pictures?

me: save to desktop

microsoft (weeping, throwing up): this email attachment... downloads?

me: desktop
130 550 4.1K
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jinah.bsky.social
Jin @jinah.bsky.social · 29d
Americans be like: wHaT’s LeFtOvEr BaCoN
4 12 60
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jinah.bsky.social
Jin @jinah.bsky.social · 3d
“If u like piña coladas…”
“In 2007 a married couple in Bosnia started cheating online […] with each other
7 11 78
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greegreehoist.bsky.social
Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 13d
Yoga is Simon Says for white women
7 32
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crow.stormsong.org
spooklebirb 🎃 👻 @crow.stormsong.org · 1d
my body is a machine that lets dogs outside and back in
1 2 8
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greegreehoist.bsky.social
Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 6h
Can Hellier season 2 be considered a Christmas show?
1 1 1
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daisy91.bsky.social
Daisy @daisy91.bsky.social · 8h
Gives you a hug and whispers kiss my ass.
21 37 100
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amutepiggy.bsky.social
alexis simpson @amutepiggy.bsky.social · 8h
riding the Suck-U-Bus, my favorite form of pubic transit
4 5 42
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sofarrsogud.bsky.social
FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF @sofarrsogud.bsky.social · 1d
*quietly beatboxing while the judge delivers my sentence
5 61 180
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blairloudly.bsky.social
Scare Blair @blairloudly.bsky.social · 21h
everything is a joke but nothing is funny anymore
4 100 290
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jimmerthatisall.bsky.social
Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 18h
I'm as much to blame as you are, I said, because what's one more lie.
2 52 120
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theciscokidder.bsky.social
Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 15h
It's sad how people expect change without actually changing anything. It's me, I'm people.
10 79 240
dadback.bsky.social
I've got a dad back @dadback.bsky.social · 11h
I'm eating a whole bag of beef jerkey before I go to the dentist to really take advantage of that free flossing they give you
2
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daisy91.bsky.social
Daisy @daisy91.bsky.social · 15h
Sorry I can’t come to your wedding. That’s the weekend I’ve scheduled to blow pet safe bubbles to my kitten.
14 70 260
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frovo.bsky.social
Frovo @frovo.bsky.social · 2d
JUDGE: will the jury read the verdict

JUROR: on the charge of possession of coke we find the defendant-

ME & JUROR AT THE SAME TIME: -guilty

ME: jinx you owe me coke

JUROR: w-what no

JUDGE: *bangs gavel* pay up it’s the law
1 17 88
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thenatewolf.bsky.social
Nate @thenatewolf.bsky.social · 17h
Saw a video called "How The World's Strongest Anchor Chains Are Made" but I can't get that riled up before bed. I'll watch it before my next workout.
1 9 59
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thatbrenna.bsky.social
Pandy Fackler 🎃 @thatbrenna.bsky.social · 17h
Good advice from my pencil cup
Tomorrow isn't promised be a ho today
1 7 32
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overlooked237.bsky.social
Chames @overlooked237.bsky.social · 2d
Ernest Goes To Town (on that ass)
2 38 120
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elleisanisland.bsky.social
Elle @elleisanisland.bsky.social · 1d
I'm sure it will ruin me but I'm ready to give obscene wealth a try
10 9 98
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lisabug.bsky.social
lisabug @lisabug.bsky.social · 1d
"Extra virgin," the bottle says.

Allegedly!
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