Jess
@froglvr.bsky.social
made of 30% recycled plastic | she/her
Reposted by Jess
ME: nukes? that’s cool, i guess. personally i get to inherit my dad’s roadster when he kicks it
PAUL MUAD’DIB ATREIDES: E Rudhi Dina, heshidhanii: ne Lisaan al-Gayib
ME: uh, it’s a 1991 Z1, actually
PAUL MUAD’DIB ATREIDES: E Rudhi Dina, heshidhanii: ne Lisaan al-Gayib
ME: uh, it’s a 1991 Z1, actually
December 20, 2025 at 2:49 PM
ME: nukes? that’s cool, i guess. personally i get to inherit my dad’s roadster when he kicks it
PAUL MUAD’DIB ATREIDES: E Rudhi Dina, heshidhanii: ne Lisaan al-Gayib
ME: uh, it’s a 1991 Z1, actually
PAUL MUAD’DIB ATREIDES: E Rudhi Dina, heshidhanii: ne Lisaan al-Gayib
ME: uh, it’s a 1991 Z1, actually
Reposted by Jess
Two dings don't make a dong
December 18, 2025 at 6:50 AM
Two dings don't make a dong
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Superman (2025)
If Goku was real he would have joined Hamas for sure.
December 14, 2025 at 6:23 PM
Superman (2025)
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Tinker Swift, Taylor Swift, Soldier Swift, Spy Swift
December 11, 2025 at 9:25 PM
Tinker Swift, Taylor Swift, Soldier Swift, Spy Swift
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Introducing the Cool S, For Her™
December 8, 2025 at 4:41 PM
Introducing the Cool S, For Her™
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remarkably well preserved santa hat found in arctic bog
December 2, 2025 at 9:37 PM
remarkably well preserved santa hat found in arctic bog
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every trans person i see post about the OU suspension knows that the suspended target is trans & a grad student, & has an innate awareness that this is about purging trans employees. every cis person i see thinks the target is a rando professor & that this is about giving conservatives good grades
December 1, 2025 at 12:04 AM
every trans person i see post about the OU suspension knows that the suspended target is trans & a grad student, & has an innate awareness that this is about purging trans employees. every cis person i see thinks the target is a rando professor & that this is about giving conservatives good grades
watched tenet after taking a brownie last night never doing that shit again. woke up thinking my dog was inverted
December 1, 2025 at 7:50 AM
watched tenet after taking a brownie last night never doing that shit again. woke up thinking my dog was inverted
sigh.. it’s 5 o clock somewhere….
November 30, 2025 at 11:36 AM
sigh.. it’s 5 o clock somewhere….
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imagine having to hear shit like "study confirms giving diabetic children insulin reduces their death rates by 100%" as if that hasn't been known for like a hunred years. that's what being trans is like
November 25, 2025 at 12:06 PM
imagine having to hear shit like "study confirms giving diabetic children insulin reduces their death rates by 100%" as if that hasn't been known for like a hunred years. that's what being trans is like
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doing the dishes in my sink so the guy coming to fix my heating doesn’t know i eat breakfast
November 25, 2025 at 1:24 PM
doing the dishes in my sink so the guy coming to fix my heating doesn’t know i eat breakfast
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At animation school I asked my professor if he thought Wallace would ever eat Gromit and he made me draw 10,000 frames of trees blowing in the wind as punishment
November 23, 2025 at 6:23 AM
At animation school I asked my professor if he thought Wallace would ever eat Gromit and he made me draw 10,000 frames of trees blowing in the wind as punishment
Reposted by Jess
Mechanic [sliding out from under Optimus Prime]: I think I see what the issue is. This truck is also a big guy somehow
November 18, 2025 at 3:48 PM
Mechanic [sliding out from under Optimus Prime]: I think I see what the issue is. This truck is also a big guy somehow
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(spending 9 billion dollars to make a robot say "i have always loved you") hard times create strong men
November 16, 2025 at 9:35 PM
(spending 9 billion dollars to make a robot say "i have always loved you") hard times create strong men
he’s gonna have a sick spotify playlist after this one
Pope Leo XIV Will Have Lunch With 4 Trans Women in "Unprecedented" Meeting
https://www.them.us/story/pope-leo-xiv-lunch-trans-activists-alesia-nobile
https://www.them.us/story/pope-leo-xiv-lunch-trans-activists-alesia-nobile
November 15, 2025 at 1:54 AM
he’s gonna have a sick spotify playlist after this one
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Well well well if it isnt the Blowjob Brothers
November 14, 2025 at 7:18 PM
Well well well if it isnt the Blowjob Brothers
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house is warm and quiet. cat is sleeping. a candle flickers softly. the only sound is of the dog in the other room going to town on his own asshole
November 14, 2025 at 12:09 AM
house is warm and quiet. cat is sleeping. a candle flickers softly. the only sound is of the dog in the other room going to town on his own asshole
Reposted by Jess
ℹ️ Your internal screaming lasted on average 3.4 hours/day during the last week (23 minutes/day less than in the previous one).
November 12, 2025 at 11:08 AM
ℹ️ Your internal screaming lasted on average 3.4 hours/day during the last week (23 minutes/day less than in the previous one).
Reposted by Jess
the emails are like
from:[email protected]
to: [email protected]
hey bestie culd u stop recruting underage girls from mar a lago i am running out of underage girls to personally have sex with
from: [email protected]
auto reply: i am out. of office . if u need underage girls. text m
from:[email protected]
to: [email protected]
hey bestie culd u stop recruting underage girls from mar a lago i am running out of underage girls to personally have sex with
from: [email protected]
auto reply: i am out. of office . if u need underage girls. text m
November 13, 2025 at 11:41 AM
the emails are like
from:[email protected]
to: [email protected]
hey bestie culd u stop recruting underage girls from mar a lago i am running out of underage girls to personally have sex with
from: [email protected]
auto reply: i am out. of office . if u need underage girls. text m
from:[email protected]
to: [email protected]
hey bestie culd u stop recruting underage girls from mar a lago i am running out of underage girls to personally have sex with
from: [email protected]
auto reply: i am out. of office . if u need underage girls. text m
Reposted by Jess
Optometrist: Do you see the monster?
Me: It's hard to make out.
Optometrist: (changes lenses) How about now?
Me: Still blurry.
Optometrist: What drips from its fangs?
Me: Drool?
Optometrist: (changes lenses)
Me: Oh, venom. Deadly venom.
Me: It's hard to make out.
Optometrist: (changes lenses) How about now?
Me: Still blurry.
Optometrist: What drips from its fangs?
Me: Drool?
Optometrist: (changes lenses)
Me: Oh, venom. Deadly venom.
November 7, 2025 at 2:01 AM
Optometrist: Do you see the monster?
Me: It's hard to make out.
Optometrist: (changes lenses) How about now?
Me: Still blurry.
Optometrist: What drips from its fangs?
Me: Drool?
Optometrist: (changes lenses)
Me: Oh, venom. Deadly venom.
Me: It's hard to make out.
Optometrist: (changes lenses) How about now?
Me: Still blurry.
Optometrist: What drips from its fangs?
Me: Drool?
Optometrist: (changes lenses)
Me: Oh, venom. Deadly venom.
i’m drinking arabic sodas you’ve never even heard of
November 5, 2025 at 6:29 PM
i’m drinking arabic sodas you’ve never even heard of
Been setting my xbox 360 up as a CD player the past few days and I forgot how cool this console was
Has a great 2000s visualiser when playing a disk and has the option to rip the tracks straight to the hard drive, this shit prolly went so hard in 2007
Has a great 2000s visualiser when playing a disk and has the option to rip the tracks straight to the hard drive, this shit prolly went so hard in 2007
November 4, 2025 at 3:32 PM
Been setting my xbox 360 up as a CD player the past few days and I forgot how cool this console was
Has a great 2000s visualiser when playing a disk and has the option to rip the tracks straight to the hard drive, this shit prolly went so hard in 2007
Has a great 2000s visualiser when playing a disk and has the option to rip the tracks straight to the hard drive, this shit prolly went so hard in 2007
Reposted by Jess
Still need more baseball?
We found a CD in our archives containing dozens of unused voice lines from MLB Slugfest 20-03 rejected by the MLB. Here's some of our favorites.
We found a CD in our archives containing dozens of unused voice lines from MLB Slugfest 20-03 rejected by the MLB. Here's some of our favorites.
November 3, 2025 at 7:31 PM
Still need more baseball?
We found a CD in our archives containing dozens of unused voice lines from MLB Slugfest 20-03 rejected by the MLB. Here's some of our favorites.
We found a CD in our archives containing dozens of unused voice lines from MLB Slugfest 20-03 rejected by the MLB. Here's some of our favorites.