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𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠

@ironlilacc.bsky.social

130 followers 55 following 140 posts

A silly ghoul

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𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠 @ironlilacc.bsky.social · 3d

I wish my last two brain cells would start touching each other or something

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Reposted by 𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠

𝗱𝗿𝗼𝗷𝗼🪾🍂 @apexamigo.bsky.social · 2h

sorry i stained your chair cushion

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𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠 @ironlilacc.bsky.social · 2h

Don't talk to me until after my coffee poop

𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠 @ironlilacc.bsky.social · 3h

Boxers infused with PROTEIN to handle the toughest most manliest skid marks

Reposted by 𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠

Dak @dak.bsky.social · 9h

I looked into the abyss. It offered me a coupon for 10% off my next emotional breakdown.

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Reposted by 𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠

grilled cheese 🧀 @grilldcheese.bsky.social · 4h

i quit pumpkin spice i'm on the patch

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Reposted by 𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠

DaddyJew @daddyjew.bsky.social · 4h

it’s always the smelliest mf alive that wants to tell you their whole life story

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Reposted by 𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠

Georgia the Explorer 🇨🇦 @georgiatheexplorer.bsky.social · 6h

That looks like an eye infection, not Maybelline

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𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠 @ironlilacc.bsky.social · 4h

My last two brain cells filed a restraining order against each other

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𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠 @ironlilacc.bsky.social · 4h

Awww thank you ❤️

𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠 @ironlilacc.bsky.social · 15h

Putting the other end of the string and tin can into the void to collect data

𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠 @ironlilacc.bsky.social · 15h

If you scream politely then ok

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Reposted by 𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠

Tits McDick @titsmcdick.bsky.social · 16h

I don’t mean to brag, but people can tell by looking at me that I’m not doing well financially.

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𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠 @ironlilacc.bsky.social · 15h

It's getting chilly out. Mind if I crack your ribs open and burrow inside?

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Reposted by 𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠

Forrest Plump @nahyoudoit.bsky.social · 20h

The best part of having ADHD is asking for somebody’s address the 1,528th time you drive over there

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𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠 @ironlilacc.bsky.social · 15h

Thucking you off with plastic fangs on

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Reposted by 𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠

Nappy DOOMlemite @nappydolemite.bsky.social · 1d

All I want to know from astrologers is which full moon will be the one to destroy my enemies

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Reposted by 𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠

Melicious @honeybadgermel.bsky.social · 1d

I get my steps in by going back to get what I forgot and forgetting what I forgot again.

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Reposted by 𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠

Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 1d

"Better the devil you know than the devil you don't," is the secret to a long marriage.

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𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠 @ironlilacc.bsky.social · 1d

Slamming nyquil like I lost a lover in the war

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Reposted by 𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠

James @james.tarnation.lol · 2d

imagining a scenario where i have to explain to an alien race why i’m so embarrassed to take them to my leader

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Reposted by 𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠

Werehud 🌙 Kurzwulf @ehudkurzweil.bsky.social · 1d

[captures you underneath a plastic cup and releases you outside]

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𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠 @ironlilacc.bsky.social · 1d

Disgusting. You're doing such a good job. But disgusting

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Reposted by 𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠

Lori @cornjerker78.bsky.social · 1d

Alright who stuck the pill in my cheese cube?

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𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠 @ironlilacc.bsky.social · 1d

Everything, I beg

𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔞𝔠 @ironlilacc.bsky.social · 1d

Coming back to life from CPR to ask you to please stop

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