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Marloween

@marlebean.bsky.social

11K followers 1.6K following 1.8K posts

If you innocently act like you don't know, people will explain dirty words to you and it's hilarious. https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7ehz6ygwahh2y3lgk7dq3xs2/feed/aaacgqxvtud72

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Marloween @marlebean.bsky.social · 4d

Working at the bank is:
10% bank transactions
87% helping clients reset their password
40% typing numbers without looking
24% accuracy

8 23 160

Reposted by Marloween

Charlie Alzamora @chalza.bsky.social · 3d

There's supposed to be a Supermoon this week, along with his arch nemesis, Lex Lunar.

2 17 58

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Grant Tanaka @granttanaka.bsky.social · 3d

[giving treats to dog]
thank you for not being people

1 160 480

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Tits McDick @titsmcdick.bsky.social · 3d

I’m always disappointed when I call someone and they answer. I’m like I had a voicemail message all rehearsed and you ruined it.

21 91

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born miserable @bornmiserable.bsky.social · 3d

if Bluesky goes under, I will go back to the ancient art of skywriting

12 40 170

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Idle @hatesnicethings.bsky.social · 3d

Fuck. I wish deep vein thrombosis was as hot as it sounded.

6 59 210

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grilled cheese 🧀 @grilldcheese.bsky.social · 3d

it's sunday, boys. you know what that means. ARE YOU READY FOR SOME APPLE PICKING

7 19

Marloween @marlebean.bsky.social · 4d

I'll try harder next time

1 1

Marloween @marlebean.bsky.social · 4d

Not at all 💁🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

Marloween @marlebean.bsky.social · 4d

Dannggg

Marloween @marlebean.bsky.social · 4d

💯

Marloween @marlebean.bsky.social · 4d

Not as glamorous as it seems

1 1

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Todd 'Papi' Carlos @thetoddwilliams.bsky.social · 7d

My mechanic said I needed "new bushings," so I slapped him across the face! The nerve!

1 4

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kattsdogma.bsky.social @kattsdogma.bsky.social · 7d

your bottle of dishwashing liquid is on your sink counter but it’s facing backwards . are you insane ?

15 51 170

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Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 7d

no way i’m falling for this a third time

Sign reads “Parking for BJ’s in rear of building.”

27 150 770

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Miss Havishambles @misshavishambles.bsky.social · 7d

Taken my make up off to practise scaring the kids.

3 18 59

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Eric Replatformed @21stcenturyeric.bsky.social · 7d

I have a Plan A and a Plan B.

Plan Sea is to fill my pockets with rocks and jump in.

2 22 64

Reposted by Marloween

Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 7d

Used car salesman knocked off 100 bucks just because he liked my face. Didn't care for my shirt, slapped on 30.

11 50

Marloween @marlebean.bsky.social · 4d

😫😫

Marloween @marlebean.bsky.social · 4d

a man is standing in front of a white board with math equations on it .

ALT: a man is standing in front of a white board with math equations on it .

media.tenor.com

Marloween @marlebean.bsky.social · 4d

Working at the bank is:
10% bank transactions
87% helping clients reset their password
40% typing numbers without looking
24% accuracy

8 23 160

Marloween @marlebean.bsky.social · 4d

Yes! So bad ass

Reposted by Marloween

Gian D’Oh @giandoh.bsky.social · 4d

I won the rap battle but lost the rap war

2 5 26

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Chames @overlooked237.bsky.social · 5d

a choose your own adventure book but it’s just me choosing a nap every time

1 18 69

Marloween @marlebean.bsky.social · 5d

🩷🩷

Marloween @marlebean.bsky.social · 5d

😆😆