weepingsponge.bsky.social
weepingsponge.bsky.social
@weepingsponge.bsky.social
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Don't watch me break down a cardboard box unless you want to fall in love with me
December 7, 2025 at 3:25 PM
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“I was just following otters.”
really went dark for the sequel
November 28, 2025 at 9:09 PM
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I hate being bald and walking the same direction as another bald guy. It looks like we’re being summoned by our king
August 1, 2025 at 8:02 PM
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I was BEYOND excited that Simon & Schuster chose me to do the copyediting on Kamala Harris's new book. I'm legally bound not to show you too much before its September release, but they allowed me to share a small sneak behind the curtain at the process of editing such a monumental work.
July 31, 2025 at 8:03 PM
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June 14, 2025 at 8:27 AM
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Keep J K Rowling out of Ireland
She's going to extend her biology is destiny campaign to Ireland. Only a fool would bet against her extending it further.
May 24, 2025 at 11:46 AM
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April 14, 2025 at 4:05 AM
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New Green Party advert just dropped explaining why you should vote for them. And its a cracker!
April 10, 2025 at 6:04 AM
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a second health bar appears above the vatican as the pope enters his next boss phase
March 22, 2025 at 7:50 PM
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February 24, 2025 at 3:10 AM
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I honestly think it would be hilarious if there was one family on White Lotus that was having just the best time, like we get two miserable storylines and then occasionally cut to this family going “We saw three dolphins!”
February 24, 2025 at 4:38 AM
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Related: This tweet from @gemmaclark.bsky.social lives in my head rent free
January 27, 2025 at 8:58 PM
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*playing a California Raisins record for a friend* Pretty good right? These are raisins playing all the instruments
November 7, 2024 at 10:11 PM
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Roses are redde
Noble are the manatees
Yf we wante a bettir future
Teach artes & humanityes
December 12, 2024 at 4:31 AM
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December 8, 2024 at 4:08 PM
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December 6, 2024 at 7:52 PM
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[pretending to talk in my sleep so I can say things to my wife without getting in trouble] new blue shirt too blue
December 1, 2024 at 6:56 PM
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You used to call me on my self-own
Drake just signed a legal document acknowledging "Not Like Us" did him great harm.

Is this not the biggest defeat in hip-hop history?
November 26, 2024 at 2:18 AM
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cashier: can take your order?

me: [spent the entire time in line rehearsing for this moment] yes, one pleaseburger cheese :)
November 11, 2024 at 12:13 AM
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Ladies love it when you come out of the bathroom unrolling your sleeves because it means you were really getting down to business in there
October 27, 2024 at 4:34 AM
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The real monster in Dracula (1897) is the reader, for reading these people’s private correspondences without their permission
October 21, 2024 at 11:53 AM
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September 21, 2024 at 1:22 PM
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September 27, 2024 at 11:22 PM
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It breaks my heart to see you suffer like this...can you go suffer somewhere in private
September 24, 2024 at 1:02 AM
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We noticed you from across the room, we really like your vibes, and we’re going to give you a 10 minute head start into the forest just to make things interesting
Finding out it was for mixed doubles and he had a partner. Great vibes
August 3, 2024 at 6:21 PM