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deeks549.bsky.social
Deeks 🫶
@deeks549.bsky.social
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This is not an inspirational account. Punch someone if you need to
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January 14, 2026 at 2:17 PM
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I still spill my drink at the dinner table...flirting.
January 14, 2026 at 3:10 AM
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It’s the “good morning” text you answer first, that’s how you’ll know
January 14, 2026 at 5:55 AM
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Opening a kcup to eat the grounds like Fun Dip
January 14, 2026 at 2:18 PM
If he doesn't check on you during the riots, he's not that into you
January 14, 2026 at 2:11 PM
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The company I work for blocked ChatGPT and watching people think in real time is genuinely frightening.
January 14, 2026 at 2:41 AM
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Everything is a sign if you’re paranoid enough.
January 7, 2026 at 8:45 PM
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Well... time to go outside.

*takes off sweatpants, puts on good sweatpants*
January 5, 2026 at 6:55 PM
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okay okay it’s time we settle this once and for all

it’s pronounced gif
January 13, 2026 at 9:07 AM
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im going to eat chocolate in the shower
January 13, 2026 at 6:03 PM
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JESUS: and when you pray, do not say “amen” it is like hanging up on god

DISCIPLE: wtf is hanging up

JESUS: look in 2000 years there’s gonna be a communication device called a “telephone” and—

DISCIPLE: wtf is a device

JESUS: it’s a thing that fits in a pocket

DISCIPLE: WTF IS A POCKET
January 13, 2026 at 5:20 PM
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fug it all, elmo
January 14, 2026 at 1:00 AM
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the feminine urge to get absolutely shredded so that men are scared of me
January 14, 2026 at 12:59 AM
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talking to the stars bc they’re the only ones that listen
January 8, 2026 at 5:07 AM
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January 8, 2026 at 5:18 AM
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January 3, 2026 at 12:57 AM
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH
January 14, 2026 at 12:00 AM
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"Oh she's sweet but a psycho."
Okay but how's her ass ffs
January 14, 2026 at 12:05 AM
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January 14, 2026 at 12:13 AM
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Got banned for life from working in McDonald's on my first day for shouting YES McCHEF every time an order came in.
January 1, 2026 at 2:02 PM
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live your life in such a way that, 1) people don’t celebrate when you die, that’s a given, and 2) people don’t refer to you as your cartoon when you die because they forgot your real name
January 13, 2026 at 10:33 PM
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You can’t fix crazy, but you can join it.
January 13, 2026 at 9:49 PM
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i'm clearly unable to pay attention to everything on this app......

*blank stares
January 13, 2026 at 10:16 PM
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Scared the solar guy away. Ash 1. Solar new guy 0. Until next week a-hole.
January 13, 2026 at 11:02 PM
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I don't want to be talked at anymore today please and thank you, silence is needed.
January 13, 2026 at 11:05 PM