Reposted by Whimsikel
I’ve had three gallons of Mountain Dew today and I’m ready to fight the sun.
May 9, 2025 at 9:57 PM
I’ve had three gallons of Mountain Dew today and I’m ready to fight the sun.
Reposted by Whimsikel
He was regal, like the cinemas
March 29, 2025 at 11:59 PM
He was regal, like the cinemas
Reposted by Whimsikel
The past tense of squeeze is squoze.
I will not be taking questions at this time.
I will not be taking questions at this time.
March 13, 2025 at 11:52 PM
The past tense of squeeze is squoze.
I will not be taking questions at this time.
I will not be taking questions at this time.
Reposted by Whimsikel
Classic rock only exists to let you know when you got old.
March 9, 2025 at 8:39 PM
Classic rock only exists to let you know when you got old.
Reposted by Whimsikel
Spring forward.
Fall apart.
Fall apart.
March 9, 2025 at 2:51 PM
Spring forward.
Fall apart.
Fall apart.
Reposted by Whimsikel
imagine being mad at me and i’m at home chucking nuts and seeds across my driveway hoping that just one corvid will notice me
March 9, 2025 at 5:27 PM
imagine being mad at me and i’m at home chucking nuts and seeds across my driveway hoping that just one corvid will notice me
Reposted by Whimsikel
I have good news and bad news. The bad news is I'm totally lying about there being any good news.
March 7, 2025 at 1:56 AM
I have good news and bad news. The bad news is I'm totally lying about there being any good news.
Reposted by Whimsikel
I put a coexist sticker on my truck and I post memes on the bluesky everyday, idk what more you could possibly want from me.
March 7, 2025 at 1:22 AM
I put a coexist sticker on my truck and I post memes on the bluesky everyday, idk what more you could possibly want from me.
Reposted by Whimsikel
We’re going to have a masque, an incredible masque, a masque of death, even, if you can believe it. They say “oh you can’t do it you can’t do it in the castle” but we are going to do it I can tell you, we are doing it with so many colors but mainly red, red the most beautiful red you’ve ever seen
March 7, 2025 at 3:24 AM
We’re going to have a masque, an incredible masque, a masque of death, even, if you can believe it. They say “oh you can’t do it you can’t do it in the castle” but we are going to do it I can tell you, we are doing it with so many colors but mainly red, red the most beautiful red you’ve ever seen
Reposted by Whimsikel
What you guys need to do is go outside. Get some air, talk to some girls. Get rejected. One time I handed a girl my phone number and she looked at it and handed it back to me. See now THAT builds character
March 7, 2025 at 10:59 AM
What you guys need to do is go outside. Get some air, talk to some girls. Get rejected. One time I handed a girl my phone number and she looked at it and handed it back to me. See now THAT builds character
Reposted by Whimsikel
She was striking, like an angry picket line.
March 7, 2025 at 11:57 AM
She was striking, like an angry picket line.
Reposted by Whimsikel
When I was young I did hope to live in interesting times, but that’s not how I would describe these.
March 5, 2025 at 4:35 AM
When I was young I did hope to live in interesting times, but that’s not how I would describe these.
Reposted by Whimsikel
Do we take our meds? Do we go to work? I don’t know what to wear to a Revolution
March 4, 2025 at 5:48 PM
Do we take our meds? Do we go to work? I don’t know what to wear to a Revolution
Reposted by Whimsikel
She was sultry, like a swamp.
March 4, 2025 at 1:39 PM
She was sultry, like a swamp.
Reposted by Whimsikel
I didn't think the Beatles were as groundbreaking as people said, but the lyric, "I heard the news today, oh boy," really hits nowadays
March 3, 2025 at 8:42 PM
I didn't think the Beatles were as groundbreaking as people said, but the lyric, "I heard the news today, oh boy," really hits nowadays
Reposted by Whimsikel
Feminine? No way. Maybe a femifour of femifive with my beauty sleep.
March 2, 2025 at 10:10 PM
Feminine? No way. Maybe a femifour of femifive with my beauty sleep.
Reposted by Whimsikel
I’m not saying I’m having a midlife crisis, but I recently turned 50, joined the local Kiwanis club, joined a co-ed adult ice hockey team, and adopted three more cats.
February 28, 2025 at 7:38 PM
I’m not saying I’m having a midlife crisis, but I recently turned 50, joined the local Kiwanis club, joined a co-ed adult ice hockey team, and adopted three more cats.
Reposted by Whimsikel
Okay this abyss ain't gonna stare into itself
February 27, 2025 at 5:59 PM
Okay this abyss ain't gonna stare into itself
Reposted by Whimsikel
Why do we call it running errands, rather than store trek?
February 27, 2025 at 7:09 PM
Why do we call it running errands, rather than store trek?
Reposted by Whimsikel
*gets a papercut*
"Please, donate my body to science."
"Please, donate my body to science."
February 25, 2025 at 8:55 PM
*gets a papercut*
"Please, donate my body to science."
"Please, donate my body to science."
Reposted by Whimsikel
My imaginary band needs a bass player, so I have to learn to play bass now.
February 25, 2025 at 4:17 PM
My imaginary band needs a bass player, so I have to learn to play bass now.
Reposted by Whimsikel
Do you ever think about the grand scale of the universe, and how even the most spectacular and majestic dick is actually just a tiny speck?
February 25, 2025 at 2:21 AM
Do you ever think about the grand scale of the universe, and how even the most spectacular and majestic dick is actually just a tiny speck?
Reposted by Whimsikel
Still punk as fuck, I murmur as I download a new weather app
February 22, 2025 at 2:01 PM
Still punk as fuck, I murmur as I download a new weather app
Reposted by Whimsikel
She was rare, like a politician with integrity.
February 22, 2025 at 3:32 PM
She was rare, like a politician with integrity.
Reposted by Whimsikel
Love my new morning routine of waking up, brewing some coffee, logging on and checking the End Times Billboard to see what new Calamities were pinned there overnight. Then I ride that cortisol high, like I'm surfing on piranhas and broken glass, baby.
February 17, 2025 at 2:44 PM
Love my new morning routine of waking up, brewing some coffee, logging on and checking the End Times Billboard to see what new Calamities were pinned there overnight. Then I ride that cortisol high, like I'm surfing on piranhas and broken glass, baby.