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Not JPo

@notjpo.bsky.social

5.2K followers 440 following 2.6K posts

No, it’s not hormones, I’m always this unpleasant. Favstar has-been Recent: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:6cru4zjayaugsxgzysz223ts/feed/aaahccdnlzcz4 Popular: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:6cru4zjayaugsxgzysz223ts/feed/aaahcc3hp2o6s

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Not JPo @notjpo.bsky.social · 1d

Whenever you feel alone remember that there are a lot of people in your life that can barely tolerate you but they do anyway

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Not JPo @notjpo.bsky.social · 4h

😆😂🤣

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sweetie π @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social · 6h

“charity begins at home” i think as i eat all the muffins i made for the bake sale

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sweetie π @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social · 4h

them: i love your halloween horror makeup!
me: my what?

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Damnit Janet @damnitjanet.bsky.social · 22h

Calling my phone company to complain that my predictive text needs to wash its mouth out with soap

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Jack @wakeupangry.bsky.social · 20h

IMO CIRCLES ARE MORE FAIR THAN SQUARES

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Destry Broderick @destry.bsky.social · 1d

I took the dog for a wok. I don't know why. He can't cook for shit.

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Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 4h

listen, I know A.I. isn't very good at anything, but we have to start using it or it won't take our jobs and then crash the economy

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Not JPo @notjpo.bsky.social · 5h

Keep up the good work!

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Not JPo @notjpo.bsky.social · 5h

Excellent point

Not JPo @notjpo.bsky.social · 5h

True. 1 out of every 8 people is a butthole enthusiast

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Vamp Lizzlepants 🧛🏻‍♀️ @lizzlepants.bsky.social · 7h

when do we start eating the billionaires
I’ve got a new hot sauce I wanna try

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Fomonster Simpson 🎃 @haliphacks.bsky.social · 6d

Me, in my bathroom looking at a medication that was made by a company that went out of business in 2007: I can find a use for this.

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 2d

I haven’t been the same since I walked in on my parents having sex.

Mom thought it was pretty amazing that I could walk while having sex, though.

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Ennui Doofen @ennuidoofen.bsky.social · 2d

it's okay to have fun during spooky month even if you're having a whole spooky life

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Not JPo @notjpo.bsky.social · 8h

Just know that your great grandparents are looking down at you from heaven feeling so proud of your butthole skeets

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Vamp Lizzlepants 🧛🏻‍♀️ @lizzlepants.bsky.social · 1d

bluesky is where one goes to stay up to date on current events if you like your daily news dripping with sarcasm and maybe some fondue

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Dandy @mindsxmeet.bsky.social · 2d

And then, some of a sudden…

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Idle @hatesnicethings.bsky.social · 18h

In the nineties sometimes, you’d ask a lady what she wanted to do and she’d respond “shoop” and I never knew what to do after that.

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Idle @hatesnicethings.bsky.social · 1d

Depression is my main squeeze, anxiety is just my side piece.

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Idle @hatesnicethings.bsky.social · 2d

Fuck. I wish deep vein thrombosis was as hot as it sounded.

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Georgia the Explorer 🇨🇦 @georgiatheexplorer.bsky.social · 1d

Gonna ask people who talk loudly why they're being such shouty pantses

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Mr. Bea Arthur, Dead Inside™️ @steamymac.bsky.social · 2d

Is there a non-sexy way to eat celery?

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Frovo @frovo.bsky.social · 1d

JUDGE: will the jury read the verdict

JUROR: on the charge of possession of coke we find the defendant-

ME & JUROR AT THE SAME TIME: -guilty

ME: jinx you owe me coke

JUROR: w-what no

JUDGE: *bangs gavel* pay up it’s the law

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John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 1d

Bob Dylan's Blonde on Blonde is my favorite classic rock album that I can't Google at work.

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