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Chestbursty

@chestrovert.bsky.social

8.7K followers 790 following 5.4K posts

1. Be excellent to each other 2. Party on dudes My care bear stares: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:dlm76unvjc5an7kn56z6j4ds/feed/aaab3oaymtk2g My Worst: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:dlm76unvjc5an7kn56z6j4ds/feed/aaaawyfc7givy

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Chestbursty @chestrovert.bsky.social · Apr 5

"Your laugh is like a sunset," I say right before I nail gun my hand to the frame of a revolving door

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Hi, it's Abby. Yep. @itsabbyyep.bsky.social · 3d

Not to get political but someone left a dildo in my building's driveway today. And when I got back from my errands it was gone

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Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 1d

Thought it was a spooky Halloween owl but turns out it was just my asthma pipes

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Wendigo Wires 👻 @joparkerbear.bsky.social · 15h

Australians make the best horror because they live on the earth’s most terrifying continent.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 9h

Just got back from the Vet.

Forgot the dog.

Heading back to the Vet now with dog AND coffee.

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Marjorie James Keenan @unenthusiast.com · 7h

I’m allergic to cats but still celebrate this holy day

Ripley in Nostromo jumpsuit and flamethrower looks over-shoulder and out of frame while Jonesy hisses while hiding behind her leg by Artem Bizyaev — Caturday bb

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The Amytyville Horror @msfoxifurnasty.bsky.social · 1d

upon my death i request to be placed in a clawfoot tub filled with marshmallows and suspended over a fire so people can make s’mores out of me

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d.ly @dly.bsky.social · 17h

I watched a video captioned “You can Dougie to anything if you aren’t a coward” and then he proceeded to Dougie to Linger by The Cranberries

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Gretchen @wokkax3.bsky.social · 8h

Jan 2021

Sexy squirrel with an acorn in mouth. Black and white

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Gef the Toking Mongoose @geftokingmongoose.bsky.social · 1d

when you hear a couple start to fight at the restaurant

Still from the weird Peter Boyle TV Poochinski about a cop that gets reincarnated as a dog show the titular dog man done by I believe poor animatronics with an uncanny face hard eyes and a too articulate looking mouth. It's mouth appears to open as if if in midspeech and he is kind of looking off camera.

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AHHH! real meghan!! 나영지 🇵🇸 @ruemcclammyhand.bsky.social · 1d

“EDM bagpipers are climbing the bridges” is not something i expected to hear about portland but now that i have i’m like yeah, sure. naturally.

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One Dog’s Opinion 🐾 @onedogsopinion.bsky.social · 21h

SUITED UP AND REPORTING FOR DUTY 🐸

Small cute dog (Chihuahua probably) wearing a fetching green “frog” sweatshirt/costume.

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shaunt @shaunvids.bsky.social · 22h

i saw people saying '6 7' and didn't get the reference so i searched for it on here and the first thing i saw was a picture of two buff furry wolfmen jacking off into a urinal. good night

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lanyardigan @lanyardigan.bsky.social · 1d

It’s also so surreal to have been worrying about this shit for nigh on 10 years and to see it happening. I feel like the guy who gets crushed by the steamroller in Austin Powers. “Lol”

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Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 1d

I was a sailor on a merchant vessel carrying claret and port away from the continent but now I just rig clotheslines

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Seamus O'Flaugherty @seamussaid.bsky.social · 1d

just a friendly reminder it's not technically assault to attach suction cup dildos to fed riot shields

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chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 23h

If there is a pore, yo I'll unclog it
Check out this weird, sketchy blackhead hook I bought on Shein while my DJ revolves it

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Wendigo Wires 👻 @joparkerbear.bsky.social · 1d

Got really high and realized this is actually about the Democratic Party

Wendigo Wires 👻 @joparkerbear.bsky.social · Jul 14

In every single episode, the Scooby Doo gang discover a human is behind the mystery, not ghosts or mummies or whatever. Yet they begin each new case believing the villain is a supernatural being. Every time. Not once do they say “maybe it’s an old man like last time”

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Chestbursty @chestrovert.bsky.social · Dec 31

You look like your bongwater has pulp in it

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grilled cheese 🧀 @grilldcheese.bsky.social · 1d

the best human on the planet can't compete with a halfway decent dog. would you pick up the best human's shit for them? the defense rests.

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debbspook @debbshock.blue · 1d

give a dude a fish, nobody knows what the fuck he'll do with it. he could wear it on his head. dudes are so weird

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Wendigo Wires 👻 @joparkerbear.bsky.social · 1d

I’m going to a matinee of Rocky Horror next weekend. Seems… wrong, right? It should only be viewed at midnight. Last year, I saw it at 10PM and that felt pretty odd, too. I cannot abide all this sacrilege.

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Pandy Fackler 🎃 @thatbrenna.bsky.social · 1d

Today's tshirt

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xsfleabaggage.bsky.social @xsfleabaggage.bsky.social · 1d

Interesting:
Uni didn’t want to award or acknowledge my PhD pass till I’d paid my library “fines”.
Like dudes, what you think I was doing with those books, wanking off over philosophy?

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 1d

I just read someone quoting Shakespeare on here. It’s happening, guys.

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CrazyMyra @outonthemoors.bsky.social · 1d

This is why they don't let me sit near the emergency doors now

Inside of an empty passenger aircraft, with the slide fully deployed and twisted all over the place. Date on photo is 12/9/2003

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