I've got a dad back
@dadback.bsky.social
Pinned
I've got a dad back
@dadback.bsky.social
· Nov 15
The guy who named Bigfoot is not allowed to name anything else. Imagine seeing a giant humanoid creature roaming through the woods and thinking to yourself, "Holy shit, I bet that thing has huge feet"
Reposted by I've got a dad back
"killing your clone is still murder" sounds like something a clone would say
January 14, 2026 at 8:07 PM
"killing your clone is still murder" sounds like something a clone would say
Reposted by I've got a dad back
[over the walmart sound system] midnight trains goi- *muffled sounds of a struggle* MIDNIGHT TRAINS GOING ANYWHERE DONT EXIST THEY ALL GO TO SPECIFIC PLACES WAKE UP SHEEPLE
January 15, 2026 at 1:26 AM
[over the walmart sound system] midnight trains goi- *muffled sounds of a struggle* MIDNIGHT TRAINS GOING ANYWHERE DONT EXIST THEY ALL GO TO SPECIFIC PLACES WAKE UP SHEEPLE
Reposted by I've got a dad back
Crickets are cheap and readily available from all good pet stores if you're looking to introduce a fun and interesting new problem to your life
January 14, 2026 at 10:30 PM
Crickets are cheap and readily available from all good pet stores if you're looking to introduce a fun and interesting new problem to your life
Reposted by I've got a dad back
"bluesky is boring" then youre a fake ass poster. youre not supposed to mindlessly scroll youre supposed to post your every thought for the five people who care about u
January 13, 2026 at 5:47 PM
"bluesky is boring" then youre a fake ass poster. youre not supposed to mindlessly scroll youre supposed to post your every thought for the five people who care about u
Reposted by I've got a dad back
QR codes for ICE is hilarious, like they’re a restaurant menu that shoots people in the face.
January 14, 2026 at 6:15 PM
QR codes for ICE is hilarious, like they’re a restaurant menu that shoots people in the face.
Reposted by I've got a dad back
The gofundme for that factory worker who called Trump a pedophile protector is at like $300k. Funniest possible outcome of this is everyone rushing to do the same thing in the hopes of getting paid
January 14, 2026 at 5:16 PM
The gofundme for that factory worker who called Trump a pedophile protector is at like $300k. Funniest possible outcome of this is everyone rushing to do the same thing in the hopes of getting paid
Reposted by I've got a dad back
First guy to say theres more than one way to skin a cat: "theres more than one way to skin a cat"
Other guy: "wow what a normal statement holy shit"
Other guy: "wow what a normal statement holy shit"
January 14, 2026 at 4:21 PM
First guy to say theres more than one way to skin a cat: "theres more than one way to skin a cat"
Other guy: "wow what a normal statement holy shit"
Other guy: "wow what a normal statement holy shit"
Reposted by I've got a dad back
A Tribe Called Quest were courageous pioneers in promoting the concept of ensuring one has enthusiastic consent before kicking it
January 14, 2026 at 8:49 AM
A Tribe Called Quest were courageous pioneers in promoting the concept of ensuring one has enthusiastic consent before kicking it
Reposted by I've got a dad back
Therapist: is it the flying fairy kid again?
Captain Hook: he just pisses me off so bad
Captain Hook: he just pisses me off so bad
January 10, 2026 at 10:11 PM
Therapist: is it the flying fairy kid again?
Captain Hook: he just pisses me off so bad
Captain Hook: he just pisses me off so bad
Reposted by I've got a dad back
Just heard that Bill Maher has won the FIFA Golden Globe for Best Stand-Up Special.
January 14, 2026 at 3:52 PM
Just heard that Bill Maher has won the FIFA Golden Globe for Best Stand-Up Special.
Reposted by I've got a dad back
Before you read about the FBI raid and think about how bad it is for our democracy, read about Hannah’s life this year and think about how unbelievably brutal it is for her. archive.ph/2025.12.27-1...
January 14, 2026 at 2:58 PM
Before you read about the FBI raid and think about how bad it is for our democracy, read about Hannah’s life this year and think about how unbelievably brutal it is for her. archive.ph/2025.12.27-1...
Reposted by I've got a dad back
God I wish Scrub Daddy had an unlimited marketing budget. Could you imagine the unhinged shit they could conjure up with 5 billion dollars?
January 14, 2026 at 8:55 AM
God I wish Scrub Daddy had an unlimited marketing budget. Could you imagine the unhinged shit they could conjure up with 5 billion dollars?
Reposted by I've got a dad back
Baby on the train looked at me and just immediately started crying. bit rude I assure you baby nobody is less pleased about all this than I am but I'm doing the best I can.
January 14, 2026 at 8:48 AM
Baby on the train looked at me and just immediately started crying. bit rude I assure you baby nobody is less pleased about all this than I am but I'm doing the best I can.
I've been listening to Land Down Under and what I am hearing is if you are from Australia people will just give you food? Like, breakfast, sandwiches, the lot? Anyway, I am working on my citizenship application now
January 14, 2026 at 1:05 PM
I've been listening to Land Down Under and what I am hearing is if you are from Australia people will just give you food? Like, breakfast, sandwiches, the lot? Anyway, I am working on my citizenship application now
Me: put your fingers in my mouth
Dentist: please don't say it like that
Dentist: please don't say it like that
January 14, 2026 at 12:18 PM
Me: put your fingers in my mouth
Dentist: please don't say it like that
Dentist: please don't say it like that
Reposted by I've got a dad back
A U.S. president cannot be held accountable. Therefore, a U.S. president must never make a policy decision.
January 14, 2026 at 4:41 AM
A U.S. president cannot be held accountable. Therefore, a U.S. president must never make a policy decision.
Reposted by I've got a dad back
Waitress: what can I get ya?
Me: I'll have the rum cake but with the rum on the side
Waitress: so you want a glass of rum & a cupcake?
Me: yes please
Me: I'll have the rum cake but with the rum on the side
Waitress: so you want a glass of rum & a cupcake?
Me: yes please
February 4, 2025 at 7:36 PM
Waitress: what can I get ya?
Me: I'll have the rum cake but with the rum on the side
Waitress: so you want a glass of rum & a cupcake?
Me: yes please
Me: I'll have the rum cake but with the rum on the side
Waitress: so you want a glass of rum & a cupcake?
Me: yes please
Reposted by I've got a dad back
if romans are from rome, ramen is from… who tf cares it’s going into my stomach now
January 12, 2026 at 11:26 PM
if romans are from rome, ramen is from… who tf cares it’s going into my stomach now
Reposted by I've got a dad back
listen here son, when I was your age I had to walk 10 miles uphill in a snowstorm to get pornography
January 14, 2026 at 1:36 AM
listen here son, when I was your age I had to walk 10 miles uphill in a snowstorm to get pornography
Reposted by I've got a dad back
who's the person on the right. i don't recognize him
January 14, 2026 at 1:00 AM
who's the person on the right. i don't recognize him
Reposted by I've got a dad back
jack daniels can be classified as either bourbon or whiskey, since bourbon and whiskey are simply different names for identical products
January 14, 2026 at 1:00 AM
jack daniels can be classified as either bourbon or whiskey, since bourbon and whiskey are simply different names for identical products
Reposted by I've got a dad back
Scott Adams dying at 68 rather than 69 is the perfect capstone to a life of being almost — but not quite — funny
January 13, 2026 at 6:49 PM
Scott Adams dying at 68 rather than 69 is the perfect capstone to a life of being almost — but not quite — funny
Reposted by I've got a dad back
me realizing I'm turning 46 in about a month…
January 11, 2026 at 4:04 AM
me realizing I'm turning 46 in about a month…
Reposted by I've got a dad back
What if the evening news, but divorced?
Update — Here is what the new apparent CBS News segment "Whiskey Fridays with Tony Dokoupil" may look like:
January 14, 2026 at 1:17 AM
What if the evening news, but divorced?
Reposted by I've got a dad back
u should be able to plug ur phone into one of those ev stations and charge it fully in like 12 seconds
January 13, 2026 at 6:21 PM
u should be able to plug ur phone into one of those ev stations and charge it fully in like 12 seconds