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Leen McBeans 🦇

@leenmcbeans.bsky.social

18K followers 2.6K following 5.7K posts

Good intentions, questionable methods. The Mother of Dad Jokes™️. Recovering academic turned shitposter 🇵🇸 (they/she)🏳️‍🌈 avi 🎨 by @geraldinepiche.bsky.social Garbáge 🗣️ bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7bv2ca3yawj662o7qxd5xyt7/feed/aaalmvj26kmvy

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Leen McBeans 🦇 @leenmcbeans.bsky.social · 17d

One of my favorite fun facts is why the TMNT are named after artists (it’s because the type of turtle they are is a “painted turtle”). I told my nephew about this and he immediately replied that there should be a Bob Ross turtle. So rather than explain the renaissance movement to him, I-

Cartoon drawing of a teenage mutant ninja turtle with a brown afro, like Bob Ross, and a yellow eye band. Labeled “Bob”, an honorary unofficial fifth TMNT. Bob looks like a shy friendly outcast ninja turtle, to be honest. Made for an 8yo boy who made a cute comment ☺️

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Talia Lavin @swordsjew.bsky.social · 7h

fleabag from the show fleabag looking horrified and offended (because she shags a hot priest)

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Brendel @brendelbored.bsky.social · 6h

I know it’s just one meaningless story but it’s pretty emblematic of the media that all this shit is going on and someone at a long standing newspaper was like I’m finally gonna write about how everyone thinks Johnny Cash is a fuckin nerd, and the editor was like “yes, America needs to know”

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donni saphire @donni.bsky.social · 8h

It’s actually pretty bad for your mental health to know stuff

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Fun @funkelly.bsky.social · 7h

sounds like someone doesn’t want to see me pole vault

Thread- I said not to brag but im probably really good at pole vaulting

Then some Addict cakes angry old bat said “it’s harder than it looks,” and I said “no it’s not.”

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GᵣₐbₜₕₑWₑₙₑₛₛ @ayankdownunder.bsky.social · 10h

I'm honestly going to miss all of you who are going to Mastodon.

But it's comforting to know you're only a 2-hour account setup away.

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d.ly @dly.bsky.social · 10h

party themes are getting too niche these days

a text to D saying "do you want to come to the urology holiday party"

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mindflakes @mindflakes.bsky.social · 14h

Convince your neighbors you own a pet owl by yelling "has anyone seen my pet owl" through their letterbox at 4am

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weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 14h

The bread namers went ham on pumpernickel

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Brendel @brendelbored.bsky.social · 13h

Drake sitting there reading about how good the judge thought the song was and how everyone really enjoyed it

The song contains lyrics explicitly accusing Drake of being a pedophile, set to a catchy beat and propulsive
bassline. "Not Like Us" went on to become a cultural sensation.

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d.ly @dly.bsky.social · 13h

you should have to pass a basic IQ test before being allowed to drive in the left lane

d.ly @dly.bsky.social · 11d

you should have to pass a basic IQ test before being allowed to use self-checkout

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weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 13h

"Do you have kids?"

Do you work for the census?

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ThinlyVeiledPanda @thinlyveiledpanda.bsky.social · 13h

Dental X-rays? You mean tooth pics?

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The Onion @theonion.com · 13h

Dolly Parton Shares Video Confirming Sister A Shit-Stirring Bitch https://theonion.com/dolly-parton-shares-video-confirming-sister-a-shit-stirring-bitch/

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The Tennessee Holler @thetnholler.bsky.social · 23h

They did this with this dude more than twice too

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Tamper Proof Lid @readuction.bsky.social · 22h

Around this time of year, brits will wear ‘poppies’ out of deep respect for the international heroin trade

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rax ‘levon honkers’ king @raxkingisdead.bsky.social · 21h

people on here apparently need to learn a lesson most of us learn in elementary school, which is that it’s fucking rude to correct people on zero stakes things and doing so leads rightfully to social ostracism

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Leen McBeans 🦇 @leenmcbeans.bsky.social · 18h

🫡

Reposted by Leen McBeans 🦇

mean things I say to myself @meantomyself.bsky.social · 20h

This morning in carpool, a SUV barrelled up ten minutes early and bypassed the entire thing by using the out lane and dropped off a kid. I never saw such a breach of procedure. As he sped past me on his way out, I looked in his eyes and saw a grandpa that def said, "I am too old for this shit"

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emily moonlight @threnody.bsky.social · 20h

just watched a dozen people ask microsoft copilot experts their most pressing questions and those questions were 90% “how do i turn it off?” and “when i turn it off, is it really off or is it spying on me?”

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Midge @midge.bsky.social · 20h

People over 40 watching birds at the bird feeder

Picture of a crowd going wild with enthusiasm

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Michael Jay McClure @mjmimages.bsky.social · 19h

Good morning, I guess. Today, upon leaving my place, I found one book on my shelf turned backward, pages facing out, & of course, panicked & experienced vertigo & immediately called my lesbian bestie & she laughed—laughed!—& said she did that last weekend to see how long it look me to “freak out.”

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dillo (yakubian mamba) @dillo.media · 1d

i will vote for anybody who fixes the headlight brightness situation

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alexis simpson @amutepiggy.bsky.social · 1d

whats Pinocchio's favorite pizza. "Dominose." (the crowd applauds weakly but with an awareness that i have consolidated power and begun my invasion of the Low Countries)

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Leen McBeans 🦇 @leenmcbeans.bsky.social · 1d

a woman singing into a shower head with the words " i got a pocket got a pocketful of sunshine "

Alt: a woman singing into a shower head with the words " i got a pocket got a pocketful of sunshine "

media.tenor.com

Leen McBeans 🦇 @leenmcbeans.bsky.social · 1d

The macaroni ones? Nah. The paint ruins the taste, sadly