Optimist Primus
@optimistprimus.bsky.social
I deleted my account years ago, but some people claim they still see my posts
Don't read these after midnight:
bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaagbiuaqzqpg
Don't read these after midnight:
bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaagbiuaqzqpg
Pinned
Life is beauty wrapped in a nightmare. And I'm just chipping away at the shell, looking for that creamy center.
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Poster's Madness Advent Calendar
November 24, 2025 at 5:36 PM
Poster's Madness Advent Calendar
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my problem with gyoza is that they normally come in an order of about 6, but what I really need is 100 of them
November 24, 2025 at 5:22 PM
my problem with gyoza is that they normally come in an order of about 6, but what I really need is 100 of them
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it’s a new day duckling
July 5, 2024 at 10:00 AM
it’s a new day duckling
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they should make cigarettes that are good for you
November 24, 2025 at 1:50 AM
they should make cigarettes that are good for you
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ODIN SKYLINE CLEANSE 🐕🖤
November 23, 2025 at 4:06 PM
ODIN SKYLINE CLEANSE 🐕🖤
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could you pls hold this for a me *hands you some wasps*
November 23, 2025 at 7:32 PM
could you pls hold this for a me *hands you some wasps*
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it’s cool that one day i will die and everything will keep going without me
November 20, 2025 at 10:04 PM
it’s cool that one day i will die and everything will keep going without me
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i don’t get enough credit for being one of the greatest minds of our time
November 21, 2025 at 4:56 PM
i don’t get enough credit for being one of the greatest minds of our time
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This is for all of you: You are loved and please don't wonder about it because we love you.
You are loved.
You're loved.
You are loved.
You're loved.
November 22, 2025 at 1:44 AM
This is for all of you: You are loved and please don't wonder about it because we love you.
You are loved.
You're loved.
You are loved.
You're loved.
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might fuck around and fall through the cracks of society
November 22, 2025 at 12:42 AM
might fuck around and fall through the cracks of society
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I heard someone from my high school became a god and kissed the sun
November 21, 2025 at 10:05 PM
I heard someone from my high school became a god and kissed the sun
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Seems like more of an existential crisis kind of sitch…
June 11, 2025 at 1:00 AM
Seems like more of an existential crisis kind of sitch…
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*shrugs* could be worse. Your toothbrush could grow hands while you're brushing and grab onto your lips
March 15, 2024 at 11:04 AM
*shrugs* could be worse. Your toothbrush could grow hands while you're brushing and grab onto your lips
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Hapless rube in commercial for AI: Gemini, what does the recipe mean by, “finish by broiling on top rack for 4 minutes”? 😩
Gemini: Amazing job on the cooking! It can be scary. First of all, an oven is like an epic car without wheels that gets hot
Gemini: Amazing job on the cooking! It can be scary. First of all, an oven is like an epic car without wheels that gets hot
November 20, 2025 at 10:43 PM
Hapless rube in commercial for AI: Gemini, what does the recipe mean by, “finish by broiling on top rack for 4 minutes”? 😩
Gemini: Amazing job on the cooking! It can be scary. First of all, an oven is like an epic car without wheels that gets hot
Gemini: Amazing job on the cooking! It can be scary. First of all, an oven is like an epic car without wheels that gets hot
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Let’s be delirious.
November 20, 2025 at 5:17 AM
Let’s be delirious.
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We light ourselves afire.
November 20, 2025 at 5:24 AM
We light ourselves afire.
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Pardon me while I slip into something a little more comfortable, (an alternate timeline)
November 20, 2025 at 2:55 AM
Pardon me while I slip into something a little more comfortable, (an alternate timeline)
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(Sylvester the Cat voice) Thhhovereign Thhitizen!
November 20, 2025 at 1:01 AM
(Sylvester the Cat voice) Thhhovereign Thhitizen!
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Not dead, but haunted by a ghost who is also me.
November 19, 2025 at 9:59 PM
Not dead, but haunted by a ghost who is also me.
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The Ocean: I've just graduated with honors from the University of Being The Ocean
me: congratuloceans!
The Ocean: Thank you.
me: congratuloceans!
The Ocean: Thank you.
November 18, 2025 at 3:26 PM
The Ocean: I've just graduated with honors from the University of Being The Ocean
me: congratuloceans!
The Ocean: Thank you.
me: congratuloceans!
The Ocean: Thank you.
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May today not suck.
November 18, 2025 at 3:09 PM
May today not suck.
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first date idea: I eat a rotisserie chicken and you're in your home, eating your own rotisserie chicken
November 17, 2025 at 10:24 PM
first date idea: I eat a rotisserie chicken and you're in your home, eating your own rotisserie chicken
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The good news is the creatures in the walls heard your soliloquy and they’re planning something special for you
November 16, 2025 at 3:22 AM
The good news is the creatures in the walls heard your soliloquy and they’re planning something special for you
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sometimes i think people must not be on bsky bc i’m not getting many likes but then i reread my posts and am like oh yeah right
November 16, 2025 at 7:25 PM
sometimes i think people must not be on bsky bc i’m not getting many likes but then i reread my posts and am like oh yeah right
Men only want one thing (to fight someone on top of a moving train)
November 16, 2025 at 11:11 PM
Men only want one thing (to fight someone on top of a moving train)