Reposted by Bart
I don't know about you all, but I like to hang my stockings by the chimney haphazardly.
December 19, 2025 at 8:30 PM
I don't know about you all, but I like to hang my stockings by the chimney haphazardly.
Reposted by Bart
A sentimental journey to someplace new.
December 19, 2025 at 8:07 PM
A sentimental journey to someplace new.
Reposted by Bart
After It happens it’s going to be extremely cathartic watching them rip all of that tacky shit down
December 19, 2025 at 8:14 PM
After It happens it’s going to be extremely cathartic watching them rip all of that tacky shit down
Reposted by Bart
If I win the lottery I’m gonna hire a skywriter to write “how do I land this thing?”
December 19, 2025 at 8:44 PM
If I win the lottery I’m gonna hire a skywriter to write “how do I land this thing?”
Reposted by Bart
Doing my part to help spread holiday cheer by staying home
December 17, 2025 at 3:17 PM
Doing my part to help spread holiday cheer by staying home
Reposted by Bart
The Grinch who stole my will to live.
December 19, 2025 at 12:22 AM
The Grinch who stole my will to live.
Reposted by Bart
LinkedIn dating is gonna drop soon right ??
December 19, 2025 at 2:19 PM
LinkedIn dating is gonna drop soon right ??
Reposted by Bart
Horror movie idea:
Literally exactly as things are right this moment.
Literally exactly as things are right this moment.
December 19, 2025 at 2:10 PM
Horror movie idea:
Literally exactly as things are right this moment.
Literally exactly as things are right this moment.
Sometimes when I’m at social events I randomly shout out big words so everyone will know I’m the smartest person in the room.
December 19, 2025 at 12:00 AM
Sometimes when I’m at social events I randomly shout out big words so everyone will know I’m the smartest person in the room.
Reposted by Bart
Stages of holiday shopping
1. Plenty of time
2. Gifts for myself
3. Oh no
1. Plenty of time
2. Gifts for myself
3. Oh no
December 13, 2025 at 5:23 PM
Stages of holiday shopping
1. Plenty of time
2. Gifts for myself
3. Oh no
1. Plenty of time
2. Gifts for myself
3. Oh no
Reposted by Bart
My blood type is now Sprinkles
December 17, 2025 at 3:32 AM
My blood type is now Sprinkles
Reposted by Bart
Can’t. Beastie Boys are on WNXP
December 15, 2025 at 5:58 PM
Can’t. Beastie Boys are on WNXP
Reposted by Bart
In 6th grade I was battle rapping against my friend Jeff and my mom walked in to bring us apple slices
December 13, 2025 at 4:44 PM
In 6th grade I was battle rapping against my friend Jeff and my mom walked in to bring us apple slices
Reposted by Bart
I saw a few dribbling babies in the coffee shop today and I called them the 'salivation army' lol and that's another business I'm banned from in my town.
December 10, 2025 at 7:21 PM
I saw a few dribbling babies in the coffee shop today and I called them the 'salivation army' lol and that's another business I'm banned from in my town.
Reposted by Bart
*seizes the day*
*looks at the news*
*gives the day back*
*looks at the news*
*gives the day back*
December 11, 2025 at 11:48 PM
*seizes the day*
*looks at the news*
*gives the day back*
*looks at the news*
*gives the day back*
Reposted by Bart
Can we get those Epstein files before his term is up or he just up and dies? I want him humiliated. I want him to die knowing he has lost. I want every person associated with him to be punished as traitors.
Ma’am this is a Wendy’s
Ma’am this is a Wendy’s
December 12, 2025 at 12:18 AM
Can we get those Epstein files before his term is up or he just up and dies? I want him humiliated. I want him to die knowing he has lost. I want every person associated with him to be punished as traitors.
Ma’am this is a Wendy’s
Ma’am this is a Wendy’s
Reposted by Bart
I thought they stopped putting toys in cereal boxes but a peace prize fell out of mine.
December 10, 2025 at 5:21 PM
I thought they stopped putting toys in cereal boxes but a peace prize fell out of mine.
Reposted by Bart
In Australia, duck penises corkscrew in the other direction.
May 17, 2025 at 2:11 PM
In Australia, duck penises corkscrew in the other direction.
Reposted by Bart
ME: *accidentally calls the VP of Operations by his grindr screen name* no, no, i don't think AI could take my place
December 8, 2025 at 7:50 PM
ME: *accidentally calls the VP of Operations by his grindr screen name* no, no, i don't think AI could take my place
Reposted by Bart
ME: I’m not really into horror scenes or melodramatic roles, I can’t cry on command and I definitely won’t do nudity
KFC RECRUITER: ok
KFC RECRUITER: ok
December 8, 2025 at 8:24 PM
ME: I’m not really into horror scenes or melodramatic roles, I can’t cry on command and I definitely won’t do nudity
KFC RECRUITER: ok
KFC RECRUITER: ok
Reposted by Bart
Got tazed at the mall for shouting SLEIGH QUEEN at their Mrs Claus.
December 8, 2025 at 6:01 PM
Got tazed at the mall for shouting SLEIGH QUEEN at their Mrs Claus.
Reposted by Bart
Can’t quite put my finger on it, but it seems like the same people who want a holiday for Charlie Kirk don’t want one for MLK.
Weird.
Weird.
December 8, 2025 at 4:39 PM
Can’t quite put my finger on it, but it seems like the same people who want a holiday for Charlie Kirk don’t want one for MLK.
Weird.
Weird.
Reposted by Bart
[leaving the clone store]
ME: thanks for the help I’ll see myself out
ME: thanks for the help I’ll see myself out
November 24, 2025 at 7:50 PM
[leaving the clone store]
ME: thanks for the help I’ll see myself out
ME: thanks for the help I’ll see myself out
Reposted by Bart
Bluesky is basically a public record of your mental breakdown.
December 3, 2025 at 8:31 PM
Bluesky is basically a public record of your mental breakdown.