Pumpkin spice horchata
@eldritchanchovy.bsky.social
he/him. Millennial.
Wear a fucking mask.
Ibarra chocolate > Abuelita chocolate.
Wear a fucking mask.
Ibarra chocolate > Abuelita chocolate.
Mamdami is going to implement Shakira law. Hips caught making false statements to Wyclef Jean will be subject to fines.
Mamdani is gonna implement sharpei law. The state will now issue every family their very own wrinkle dog.
Mamdani is going to implement sashimi law. Everything will be served sliced thin and raw, with pickled ginger and wasabi.
November 9, 2025 at 7:47 AM
Mamdami is going to implement Shakira law. Hips caught making false statements to Wyclef Jean will be subject to fines.
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
Sometimes i get sad at those “I wanted to look up what kind of horse pulled medieval wagons It’s three hours later and playtex bra sewers made spacesuits i have a problem” no. No, you don’t. Hydrate and get back in there
I strongly recommend everyone do research sometimes 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘧𝘶𝘯.
Look something up on Wikipedia. Go to the little citation. Follow it. Read the article it's referencing. Follow links to the original interview. Read the paper written by the interviewee
It genuinely makes you appreciate journalism
Look something up on Wikipedia. Go to the little citation. Follow it. Read the article it's referencing. Follow links to the original interview. Read the paper written by the interviewee
It genuinely makes you appreciate journalism
November 2, 2025 at 1:14 AM
Sometimes i get sad at those “I wanted to look up what kind of horse pulled medieval wagons It’s three hours later and playtex bra sewers made spacesuits i have a problem” no. No, you don’t. Hydrate and get back in there
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
it's me, unnamed critter from bosch's triptych of the temptation of anthony!
November 1, 2025 at 12:16 AM
it's me, unnamed critter from bosch's triptych of the temptation of anthony!
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
The only time I raised my voice in five seasons of LEVERAGE was telling the TNT exec that if he sent cease and desist orders to the makers of fan videos on YouTube that I would quit the show and take an ad out in the Hollywood Reporter explaining why.
October 30, 2025 at 10:45 PM
The only time I raised my voice in five seasons of LEVERAGE was telling the TNT exec that if he sent cease and desist orders to the makers of fan videos on YouTube that I would quit the show and take an ad out in the Hollywood Reporter explaining why.
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
I read Oscar Wilde’s seminal work in one night, like an executioner was watching me. The book was actually relatable, even good. It made me… think. Perhaps the relentless pursuit of youth ultimately depletes our humanity? Or something. I told my Reply Guy this, and he said, "Nice."
I Started Reading Performatively, and Turns Out Books Are Pretty Good
It all started when Instagram introduced the twenty-slide photo dumps. Trying to post the correct ratio of photos to memes to appear both off-the-g...
buff.ly
October 30, 2025 at 2:00 AM
I read Oscar Wilde’s seminal work in one night, like an executioner was watching me. The book was actually relatable, even good. It made me… think. Perhaps the relentless pursuit of youth ultimately depletes our humanity? Or something. I told my Reply Guy this, and he said, "Nice."
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
change one letter, ruin a candy.
Reese’s Peanut Butter Cum
Reese’s Peanut Butter Cum
change one letter, ruin a candy.
candy porn
candy porn
S&M's
October 30, 2025 at 3:18 AM
change one letter, ruin a candy.
Reese’s Peanut Butter Cum
Reese’s Peanut Butter Cum
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
Designer: all right Mr. Del Toro here’s those Frankenstein’s monster designs, real sexy just like you asked for.
Del Toro: (nodding) this is exactly as sexy as I asked for.
Del Toro: (nodding) this is exactly as sexy as I asked for.
October 26, 2025 at 7:23 PM
Designer: all right Mr. Del Toro here’s those Frankenstein’s monster designs, real sexy just like you asked for.
Del Toro: (nodding) this is exactly as sexy as I asked for.
Del Toro: (nodding) this is exactly as sexy as I asked for.
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
Randos: all these autistic people didn’t exist back then! Our grandparents didn’t have ALL THIS AUTISM!
Me: Do you honestly expect us to believe a neurotypical built this?!
Me: Do you honestly expect us to believe a neurotypical built this?!
October 25, 2025 at 9:25 PM
Randos: all these autistic people didn’t exist back then! Our grandparents didn’t have ALL THIS AUTISM!
Me: Do you honestly expect us to believe a neurotypical built this?!
Me: Do you honestly expect us to believe a neurotypical built this?!
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
Food stamps are set to run out of funding in early November & I’m just here to remind you that if you catch someone stealing food at the grocery store then you should immediately call the ghostbusters because you clearly saw a ghost and they clearly vanished into thin air and you didn’t see nothin.
October 25, 2025 at 12:11 AM
Food stamps are set to run out of funding in early November & I’m just here to remind you that if you catch someone stealing food at the grocery store then you should immediately call the ghostbusters because you clearly saw a ghost and they clearly vanished into thin air and you didn’t see nothin.
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
Sleep is a biological necessity, and sleep deprivation has real physical, psychological, and social consequences that need to be taken seriously. The way our society treats it as slothful to sleep according to natural rhythms (including midday naps and variant chronotypes like night owls) is evil.
Do you have any extremely niche, but serious, ethical stances?
October 17, 2025 at 7:29 PM
Sleep is a biological necessity, and sleep deprivation has real physical, psychological, and social consequences that need to be taken seriously. The way our society treats it as slothful to sleep according to natural rhythms (including midday naps and variant chronotypes like night owls) is evil.
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
Some assorted reminders as we enter the weekend:
1. Posting illegal content is a violation of §3.B of the Bluesky terms of service.
2. Violations of the TOS may be reported through the app. See TOS §6.A
3. The Hatch Act (5 USC §7321 et seq) is a law.
1. Posting illegal content is a violation of §3.B of the Bluesky terms of service.
2. Violations of the TOS may be reported through the app. See TOS §6.A
3. The Hatch Act (5 USC §7321 et seq) is a law.
October 18, 2025 at 2:59 AM
Some assorted reminders as we enter the weekend:
1. Posting illegal content is a violation of §3.B of the Bluesky terms of service.
2. Violations of the TOS may be reported through the app. See TOS §6.A
3. The Hatch Act (5 USC §7321 et seq) is a law.
1. Posting illegal content is a violation of §3.B of the Bluesky terms of service.
2. Violations of the TOS may be reported through the app. See TOS §6.A
3. The Hatch Act (5 USC §7321 et seq) is a law.
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
Okay! This is going to take a while so I had to finish some stuff first, but: Why Da Pope Fucking Up Opus Dei Is A Huge Fucking Deal: a thread
Gimme an hour or two and then I'll explain why this is a "holy fucking shit" moment!
October 17, 2025 at 6:55 AM
Okay! This is going to take a while so I had to finish some stuff first, but: Why Da Pope Fucking Up Opus Dei Is A Huge Fucking Deal: a thread
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
You shouldn’t lose your right to vote when you are incarcerated
Do you have any extremely niche, but serious, ethical stances?
October 17, 2025 at 3:58 PM
You shouldn’t lose your right to vote when you are incarcerated
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
HOLY FUCKING SHIT
GUYS
GUYS THIS IS IS SEISMIC
GUYS I CAN'T EVEN TELL YOU
OPUS DEI IS THE SCIENTOLOGY OF CATHOLICISM THEY ARE THE ONLY THING "THE DA VINCI CODE" GOT RIGHT THEY ARE AWFUL AND THEY ARE EVIL AND THEY HAVE ENORMOUS POWER AND THEY ARE INTEGRAL TO TRADFASH CATHOLICISM
GUYS
GUYS THIS IS IS SEISMIC
GUYS I CAN'T EVEN TELL YOU
OPUS DEI IS THE SCIENTOLOGY OF CATHOLICISM THEY ARE THE ONLY THING "THE DA VINCI CODE" GOT RIGHT THEY ARE AWFUL AND THEY ARE EVIL AND THEY HAVE ENORMOUS POWER AND THEY ARE INTEGRAL TO TRADFASH CATHOLICISM
BREAKING: Pope Leo XIV is set to effectively disband Opus Dei in the coming weeks.
This would be the most sweeping internal reform of his pontificate — and a dramatic continuation of Pope Francis’s legacy.
This would be the most sweeping internal reform of his pontificate — and a dramatic continuation of Pope Francis’s legacy.
NEW: Pope Leo Set To Break Up Opus Dei
If Pope Leo does indeed approves a plan that effectively dissolves Opus Dei’s structure, it would be the most significant internal action of his short pontificate to date.
open.substack.com
October 17, 2025 at 2:53 AM
HOLY FUCKING SHIT
GUYS
GUYS THIS IS IS SEISMIC
GUYS I CAN'T EVEN TELL YOU
OPUS DEI IS THE SCIENTOLOGY OF CATHOLICISM THEY ARE THE ONLY THING "THE DA VINCI CODE" GOT RIGHT THEY ARE AWFUL AND THEY ARE EVIL AND THEY HAVE ENORMOUS POWER AND THEY ARE INTEGRAL TO TRADFASH CATHOLICISM
GUYS
GUYS THIS IS IS SEISMIC
GUYS I CAN'T EVEN TELL YOU
OPUS DEI IS THE SCIENTOLOGY OF CATHOLICISM THEY ARE THE ONLY THING "THE DA VINCI CODE" GOT RIGHT THEY ARE AWFUL AND THEY ARE EVIL AND THEY HAVE ENORMOUS POWER AND THEY ARE INTEGRAL TO TRADFASH CATHOLICISM
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
Every week it’s “do they want people/kids/disabled people/seniors to die?!”
And we keep explaining that yes, they do. Yes, they think it’s good when “weak” or marginalized people are eliminated, and they will do anything to encourage that.
And every week somehow it’s a surprise.
And we keep explaining that yes, they do. Yes, they think it’s good when “weak” or marginalized people are eliminated, and they will do anything to encourage that.
And every week somehow it’s a surprise.
October 11, 2025 at 3:11 PM
Every week it’s “do they want people/kids/disabled people/seniors to die?!”
And we keep explaining that yes, they do. Yes, they think it’s good when “weak” or marginalized people are eliminated, and they will do anything to encourage that.
And every week somehow it’s a surprise.
And we keep explaining that yes, they do. Yes, they think it’s good when “weak” or marginalized people are eliminated, and they will do anything to encourage that.
And every week somehow it’s a surprise.
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
Taps the “this administration is full of eugenicists so yes, they do want people to die” sign so hard it snaps and shards go scattering everywhere.
And yes, we saw it coming.
And yes, we saw it coming.
October 11, 2025 at 3:06 PM
Taps the “this administration is full of eugenicists so yes, they do want people to die” sign so hard it snaps and shards go scattering everywhere.
And yes, we saw it coming.
And yes, we saw it coming.
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
In honor of National Poetry Day, the greatest parody rewrite of all time:
October 2, 2025 at 3:17 PM
In honor of National Poetry Day, the greatest parody rewrite of all time:
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
If you need vaccines (25-26 Covid booster, flu, pneumonia, etc), CVS is currently very much doing a “tick this box if you qualify for this vaccine” method of self-verification for online vaccine scheduling so GO GET YOUR SHOTS before this CDC stuff gets more insane
a man with a mustache is holding a piece of paper with the word science written on it .
ALT: a man with a mustache is holding a piece of paper with the word science written on it .
media.tenor.com
October 1, 2025 at 3:18 PM
If you need vaccines (25-26 Covid booster, flu, pneumonia, etc), CVS is currently very much doing a “tick this box if you qualify for this vaccine” method of self-verification for online vaccine scheduling so GO GET YOUR SHOTS before this CDC stuff gets more insane
First base: fucking
Second base: sharing financial details
Third base: cohabitation
Home run: shelving your books together
Second base: sharing financial details
Third base: cohabitation
Home run: shelving your books together
3rd date idea: Compare health insurance co-pay amounts and chill
October 1, 2025 at 3:42 PM
First base: fucking
Second base: sharing financial details
Third base: cohabitation
Home run: shelving your books together
Second base: sharing financial details
Third base: cohabitation
Home run: shelving your books together
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
No YOU’RE thinking of the InCryptid series by @seananmcguire.bsky.social
WIFE: Uggh today SUCKED
ME: What's up babe
WIFE: Well, I was molting into my 4th 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳, or larval stage, as I developed toward becoming an 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘰, or sexually mature insect.
ME: No need to explain. I already know all this and support you as you move through the life cycle stages of an insect or bug.
ME: What's up babe
WIFE: Well, I was molting into my 4th 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳, or larval stage, as I developed toward becoming an 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘰, or sexually mature insect.
ME: No need to explain. I already know all this and support you as you move through the life cycle stages of an insect or bug.
September 25, 2025 at 11:02 PM
No YOU’RE thinking of the InCryptid series by @seananmcguire.bsky.social
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
How is it that an alleged trained health professional needs to stab me 16 times to draw blood when my cat can do it in 1 every time
September 29, 2025 at 10:46 PM
How is it that an alleged trained health professional needs to stab me 16 times to draw blood when my cat can do it in 1 every time
Reposted by Pumpkin spice horchata
I took my newly 1 year old baby to her check-up this morning & she got her MMR, chicken pox, flu & COVID shots. If she's feeling fussy tonight, I'll alternate Tylenol & Motrin, per my pediatrician's rec. How fun that I get to ignore the president & be a good mom (and good citizen) instead.
September 26, 2025 at 3:52 PM
I took my newly 1 year old baby to her check-up this morning & she got her MMR, chicken pox, flu & COVID shots. If she's feeling fussy tonight, I'll alternate Tylenol & Motrin, per my pediatrician's rec. How fun that I get to ignore the president & be a good mom (and good citizen) instead.