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Not JPo

@notjpo.bsky.social

5.2K followers 440 following 2.6K posts

No, it’s not hormones, I’m always this unpleasant. https://mastodon.social/@notjpo Recent: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:6cru4zjayaugsxgzysz223ts/feed/aaahccdnlzcz4 Popular: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:6cru4zjayaugsxgzysz223ts/feed/aaahcc3hp2o6s

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Not JPo @notjpo.bsky.social · Sep 7

I’m all out of grub, I’m so lost without food

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I've got a dad back @dadback.bsky.social · 3h

Not to brag or anything, but I've been told I have the maturity of a much, much younger man

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I'mWinters✂️SerialMom @imwintersmom.bsky.social · 1h

i got the taint of a bad toot in my mouth so came here to gargle some skeet, hope it works

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Reverie 💀🕯️ @augustreverie.bsky.social · 17h

I like to think it’s the most unhinged and unstable among us who stayed

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GᵣₐbₜₕₑWₑₙₑₛₛ @ayankdownunder.bsky.social · 1d

A murder yourstery.

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Bart @bartandsoulforreal.bsky.social · 15d

Did I miss pumpkin spice rapture season?

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FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF @sofarrsogud.bsky.social · 1d

ME: Is there another name for the large seaweed that grows to form underwater forests?

GIRLFRIEND: Sea kelp

ME: Omg that's why I'm asking YOU Sharon

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Salty in the South @saltyinthesouth.bsky.social · 1d

Straight Outta Nordstrom

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MiloKilledPunk @milopoint.bsky.social · 20h

Would you mind? I'm completely out of mine.

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☢️ Captain Antagonist ☢️ @captantagonist.bsky.social · 1d

Me and my clones are in a doppelgäng.

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AnnaMolly will typo @anna-molly.bsky.social · 13h

I mean at the rate I’m posting, no one else has to write a thing.

You’re welcome lazy people

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mindi @flawdbizkit.bsky.social · 2d

*handing out gold star stickers for anyone with independent thinking

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Not JPo @notjpo.bsky.social · 14h

I’ve had 3 of those

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Misery Highlight @miseryhighlight.bsky.social · 17h

I’d like to speak to the fantasy version of you I’ve created in my head plz

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Roxy @laboxalaroxa.bsky.social · 3d

Are you mad at me?
□ yes
□ yes

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Not JPo @notjpo.bsky.social · 17h

Hugs, except with stabbing

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[Sic] Burns @sicburns2.bsky.social · 21h

In the BlueSky olden days when some newfangled invention came along we’d clip out its fancy adverts in the local shopper and use them as fuel for our magnificently hand-forged skeet boilers in the root cellar

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John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 20h

“Someone you don’t know did something you don’t care about.” -social media notifications

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Matt HalloweenName @badthoughthaver.bsky.social · 2d

Oh yeah? Could a depressed person do *this*??

*Stays up until gone 2am trying to think of the perfect lie to not go to work in the morning*

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Tippi Hedren Collider @linanneblack.bsky.social · 1d

Let's just say that I have lived my life in such a way that it would be impossible to notice if I began having a mid-life crisis.

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Frenchy's ghost prospecting and leader of ANTIFA @frenchys-goldau.bsky.social · 1d

I like long walks on the beach, holding hands and hate fucking

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ficklenuts has a pair of normal entiddies 👻 @ficklenuts.bsky.social · 1d

If I ever tell someone to “get my good side” in a pic, I’m probably talking about my butt

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Skellyton 💀🦇 @infinitefinite.bsky.social · 1d

I'm what you might call an acquired taste*

*a bitch

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ash @ashhull.bsky.social · 1d

Like a lost puppy. I'd be a nice addition to any family.

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John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 3d

Me: Is there something I could do differently to improve my sleep?

Doctor: I recommend not looking at your phone for at least an hour before bed.

Me: So nothing then.

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trickyNOtreat 🎃 @trickykat.bsky.social · 1d

real shitposters only use lower case because we are anti-capitalism

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