BeTheCookie
@bethecookie.bsky.social
Possibly not a cookie, but definitely a Cookie
Pinned
BeTheCookie
@bethecookie.bsky.social
· Mar 26
You (boorish, uneducated): I see a woodchuck.
Me (refined, erudite): Ah yes, a forestcharles.
Me (refined, erudite): Ah yes, a forestcharles.
Reposted by BeTheCookie
Reposted by BeTheCookie
Splitting hairs over pedophilia, hebophilia, and ephebophilia is a waste of time and air.
You want to rape those who can't consent. Society requires you to be separate from it.
You want to rape those who can't consent. Society requires you to be separate from it.
November 27, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Splitting hairs over pedophilia, hebophilia, and ephebophilia is a waste of time and air.
You want to rape those who can't consent. Society requires you to be separate from it.
You want to rape those who can't consent. Society requires you to be separate from it.
Reposted by BeTheCookie
Just remember that eating pie makes your boobs bigger so eat the damn pie
November 27, 2025 at 4:00 AM
Just remember that eating pie makes your boobs bigger so eat the damn pie
Reposted by BeTheCookie
it's thanksgiving eve so don't forget to put out a glass of gravy and some stuffing for ol' farmer greg
November 27, 2025 at 4:51 AM
it's thanksgiving eve so don't forget to put out a glass of gravy and some stuffing for ol' farmer greg
Reposted by BeTheCookie
it’s so windy out this morning it blew the sunrise back fourteen minutes
November 26, 2025 at 12:15 PM
it’s so windy out this morning it blew the sunrise back fourteen minutes
Reposted by BeTheCookie
Currently looking for a Thanksgiving outfit that camouflages me as my mother’s wallpaper...something where I don’t have to pass the peas or her passive aggression.
November 26, 2025 at 1:10 PM
Currently looking for a Thanksgiving outfit that camouflages me as my mother’s wallpaper...something where I don’t have to pass the peas or her passive aggression.
Reposted by BeTheCookie
People surprised at RFK Jr's appeal don't realise how fashionable distressed leather is in some circles.
November 26, 2025 at 5:25 AM
People surprised at RFK Jr's appeal don't realise how fashionable distressed leather is in some circles.
Reposted by BeTheCookie
yearning to return to the p̞̈͑̚͞r̴̨̦͕̝ỉ͔͖̜͌ḿ̬̏ͤͅo̯̱̊͊͢r̴̨̦͕̝ḑ̴̞͛̒ỉ͔͖̜͌ā̤̓̍͘l̙͖̑̾ͣ s̠҉͍͊ͅo̯̱̊͊͢ư̡͕̭̇p̞̈͑̚͞
November 26, 2025 at 5:37 AM
yearning to return to the p̞̈͑̚͞r̴̨̦͕̝ỉ͔͖̜͌ḿ̬̏ͤͅo̯̱̊͊͢r̴̨̦͕̝ḑ̴̞͛̒ỉ͔͖̜͌ā̤̓̍͘l̙͖̑̾ͣ s̠҉͍͊ͅo̯̱̊͊͢ư̡͕̭̇p̞̈͑̚͞
Reposted by BeTheCookie
Contrary to its name, the Emperor Penguin holds no real power.
That is reserved for the Prime Minister Penguin.
That is reserved for the Prime Minister Penguin.
November 25, 2025 at 3:11 AM
Contrary to its name, the Emperor Penguin holds no real power.
That is reserved for the Prime Minister Penguin.
That is reserved for the Prime Minister Penguin.
Reposted by BeTheCookie
It’s just me, this giant wheel of cheese, & my cats against the world
November 25, 2025 at 3:12 AM
It’s just me, this giant wheel of cheese, & my cats against the world
Reposted by BeTheCookie
I just noticed that artisanal is basically art is anal without the extra spaces and now I can't unsee it
November 25, 2025 at 3:27 AM
I just noticed that artisanal is basically art is anal without the extra spaces and now I can't unsee it
Reposted by BeTheCookie
Female judges amirite? (complimentary)
November 25, 2025 at 4:23 AM
Female judges amirite? (complimentary)
Reposted by BeTheCookie
i change into my outdoor pajamas to go to the corner store bc we live in a society
November 24, 2025 at 7:00 AM
i change into my outdoor pajamas to go to the corner store bc we live in a society
Reposted by BeTheCookie
it’s always Schrödinger’s cat and never who’s cleaning Schrödinger’s cat poop box
November 24, 2025 at 7:35 AM
it’s always Schrödinger’s cat and never who’s cleaning Schrödinger’s cat poop box
Reposted by BeTheCookie
Don’t ask me where I’m from, then tell me you’re from a town 30km from Venice, Italy, and expect me to be honest. I don’t even tell my cat the truth about where we live. Beto thinks we’re in Prague.
November 24, 2025 at 7:36 AM
Don’t ask me where I’m from, then tell me you’re from a town 30km from Venice, Italy, and expect me to be honest. I don’t even tell my cat the truth about where we live. Beto thinks we’re in Prague.
Reposted by BeTheCookie
I read your tweets In Minnie Mouse's voice. Didn't help
November 24, 2025 at 8:40 AM
I read your tweets In Minnie Mouse's voice. Didn't help
Reposted by BeTheCookie
I'm bringing back "Gee wilikers!", one person backing away slowly from the conversation at a time
November 24, 2025 at 8:45 AM
I'm bringing back "Gee wilikers!", one person backing away slowly from the conversation at a time
Reposted by BeTheCookie
I bet people who don’t repost drive slow in the passing lane and block grocery aisles
November 24, 2025 at 1:36 AM
I bet people who don’t repost drive slow in the passing lane and block grocery aisles
Reposted by BeTheCookie
It's easy to mix up desert and dessert, but they both get ruined with some rain.
November 24, 2025 at 2:06 AM
It's easy to mix up desert and dessert, but they both get ruined with some rain.
Reposted by BeTheCookie
Too clever to live, too stupid to die, too fast, too furious.
November 24, 2025 at 2:10 AM
Too clever to live, too stupid to die, too fast, too furious.
Reposted by BeTheCookie
Normalize telling a man to make you dinner! Normalize telling him to Gooble up a photo of "dinner" if he asks what to make!
November 24, 2025 at 2:12 AM
Normalize telling a man to make you dinner! Normalize telling him to Gooble up a photo of "dinner" if he asks what to make!
Reposted by BeTheCookie
i got a sandcastle heart
made out of fine black sand
sometimes it turns into glass
when shit gets hot
made out of fine black sand
sometimes it turns into glass
when shit gets hot
November 23, 2025 at 10:57 AM
i got a sandcastle heart
made out of fine black sand
sometimes it turns into glass
when shit gets hot
made out of fine black sand
sometimes it turns into glass
when shit gets hot
Reposted by BeTheCookie
sunday thoughts: I wonder if people who go to church know that they don’t have to
November 23, 2025 at 12:16 PM
sunday thoughts: I wonder if people who go to church know that they don’t have to
Reposted by BeTheCookie
misread directions and gave my enemy a cursed omelet
November 23, 2025 at 12:31 PM
misread directions and gave my enemy a cursed omelet
I made a whole bunch of sawdust today, because I knew deep down inside that the sawdust wasn’t going to make itself.
November 23, 2025 at 3:37 AM
I made a whole bunch of sawdust today, because I knew deep down inside that the sawdust wasn’t going to make itself.