Native Minnow
@nativeminnow.bsky.social
A doctor, but not the important kind. Bill Clinton lookalike, but not the important kind.
They murdered a woman by shooting her in the face three times, and this ghoul is worried about “optics”
Trump is privately worried about the "optics" of ICE raids and his advisers are looking for ways to soften them, Axios reports. I'm calling bullshit: The terror and violence cannot be hived off from the broader policy agenda. They are 100% intrinsic to it.
New piece:
newrepublic.com/article/2053...
New piece:
newrepublic.com/article/2053...
Trump’s Own Advisers Suddenly Unnerved as ICE Raids Take Horrific Turn
So the president doesn’t like the “optics” of what ICE is doing. But there’s no such thing as sanitized, popular mass deportations—and this is by design.
newrepublic.com
January 20, 2026 at 4:38 PM
They murdered a woman by shooting her in the face three times, and this ghoul is worried about “optics”
Raise your hand if you only used the round Spirograph inserts because none of the others ran smoothly enough
January 20, 2026 at 3:29 PM
Raise your hand if you only used the round Spirograph inserts because none of the others ran smoothly enough
Reposted by Native Minnow
Oh god, I gotta do my fucken taxes, too?
January 19, 2026 at 11:46 PM
Oh god, I gotta do my fucken taxes, too?
Reposted by Native Minnow
Average Sunday show interview:
OFFICIAL: we are going to dip enemies of the state into acid vats
HOST: how will you pay for it?
OFFICIAL: tariffs
HOST: critics say tariffs don't generate acid vat money
OFFICIAL: tariffs have generated more money than has ever existed
HOST: thank u for ur time
OFFICIAL: we are going to dip enemies of the state into acid vats
HOST: how will you pay for it?
OFFICIAL: tariffs
HOST: critics say tariffs don't generate acid vat money
OFFICIAL: tariffs have generated more money than has ever existed
HOST: thank u for ur time
January 18, 2026 at 3:53 PM
Average Sunday show interview:
OFFICIAL: we are going to dip enemies of the state into acid vats
HOST: how will you pay for it?
OFFICIAL: tariffs
HOST: critics say tariffs don't generate acid vat money
OFFICIAL: tariffs have generated more money than has ever existed
HOST: thank u for ur time
OFFICIAL: we are going to dip enemies of the state into acid vats
HOST: how will you pay for it?
OFFICIAL: tariffs
HOST: critics say tariffs don't generate acid vat money
OFFICIAL: tariffs have generated more money than has ever existed
HOST: thank u for ur time
Reposted by Native Minnow
You could go to church or you could go to butthole bluesky. Choose wisely.
January 18, 2026 at 11:45 AM
You could go to church or you could go to butthole bluesky. Choose wisely.
Sometimes I wish there was a second option
You could go to church or you could go to butthole bluesky. Choose wisely.
January 18, 2026 at 3:15 PM
Sometimes I wish there was a second option
Reposted by Native Minnow
If you would kindly avert your eyes I would greatly appreciate it.
*struggles to get out of my sedan*
*struggles to get out of my sedan*
January 15, 2026 at 3:29 PM
If you would kindly avert your eyes I would greatly appreciate it.
*struggles to get out of my sedan*
*struggles to get out of my sedan*
Reposted by Native Minnow
a fun gag would be everyone mailing the white house their old useless trophies. just some pranking in these trying times
January 17, 2026 at 10:32 PM
a fun gag would be everyone mailing the white house their old useless trophies. just some pranking in these trying times
Reposted by Native Minnow
i would like for my tombstone to read: you're allowed to dig this one up, you won't get in trouble
June 30, 2023 at 4:34 AM
i would like for my tombstone to read: you're allowed to dig this one up, you won't get in trouble
Reposted by Native Minnow
i just really like it when my cake is wet
December 1, 2024 at 1:37 AM
i just really like it when my cake is wet
Reposted by Native Minnow
Can't. Making a little birdhouse in your soul.
January 9, 2026 at 8:07 PM
Can't. Making a little birdhouse in your soul.
Reposted by Native Minnow
I refuse to accept your merry greetings.
January 7, 2026 at 3:50 AM
I refuse to accept your merry greetings.
Reposted by Native Minnow
I don’t know who needs to hear this but if you’re getting angry with your young child because they are boring or annoying, something I found extremely helpful is to draw a curly mustache on them with eyeliner pencil. Then what, you’re mad at a little circus acrobat? A miniature old-timey strongman?
January 7, 2026 at 3:23 AM
I don’t know who needs to hear this but if you’re getting angry with your young child because they are boring or annoying, something I found extremely helpful is to draw a curly mustache on them with eyeliner pencil. Then what, you’re mad at a little circus acrobat? A miniature old-timey strongman?
Reposted by Native Minnow
Every part of the vagina also sounds like something you would see on a medieval map
January 6, 2026 at 6:21 PM
Every part of the vagina also sounds like something you would see on a medieval map
Reposted by Native Minnow
Gonna borrow this rescue pup's bio
July 29, 2025 at 11:27 PM
Gonna borrow this rescue pup's bio
Reposted by Native Minnow
Preserve the Friday traditions
November 10, 2023 at 5:13 AM
Preserve the Friday traditions
Reposted by Native Minnow
I have, on more than one occasion, been accused of making intentionally awful posts. I assure you, this is me trying my best.
January 6, 2026 at 9:39 PM
I have, on more than one occasion, been accused of making intentionally awful posts. I assure you, this is me trying my best.
It’s returned undeliverable Christmas card season
January 7, 2026 at 2:12 AM
It’s returned undeliverable Christmas card season
Reposted by Native Minnow
The new me is 5 days late — I’m worried she’s plotting an ambush rather than just making the normal switch.
January 6, 2026 at 6:16 AM
The new me is 5 days late — I’m worried she’s plotting an ambush rather than just making the normal switch.
Every musician who’s put a siren in a song owes us all money
This place needs some Innocuous Discourse pronto. Quote this with a take that’s not political or aggressive
January 6, 2026 at 5:24 AM
Every musician who’s put a siren in a song owes us all money
Reposted by Native Minnow
bro did you seriously not heed the teachings of yore
January 6, 2026 at 4:20 AM
bro did you seriously not heed the teachings of yore
Reposted by Native Minnow
i’m going to need a full refund on my taxes this year
January 4, 2026 at 2:31 AM
i’m going to need a full refund on my taxes this year
Reposted by Native Minnow
Introduce yourself with what almost killed you
Hi, I’m a 60 mph gust of wind that hits just seconds after you stepped away from the edge of a cliff in Canyonlands
Hi, I’m a 60 mph gust of wind that hits just seconds after you stepped away from the edge of a cliff in Canyonlands
Introduce yourself with what almost killed you.
Hi, I'm a NYT bestselling author
(would've been homicide).
Hi, I'm a NYT bestselling author
(would've been homicide).
Introduce yourself with what almost killed you.
Hi there, I’m an unlocked gun cabinet in my best friend’s basement rec room
Hi there, I’m an unlocked gun cabinet in my best friend’s basement rec room
January 4, 2026 at 4:31 AM
Introduce yourself with what almost killed you
Hi, I’m a 60 mph gust of wind that hits just seconds after you stepped away from the edge of a cliff in Canyonlands
Hi, I’m a 60 mph gust of wind that hits just seconds after you stepped away from the edge of a cliff in Canyonlands
Well shit, this seems bad
January 3, 2026 at 1:17 PM
Well shit, this seems bad