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amberkitty 🐈‍⬛ @amberkitty.bsky.social · 4h

Does anyone know where that beeping is coming from

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captcha @dopeshow.bsky.social · 1d

Lady Gaga implies he existence of Gentlemen Gugu, I'm not deleting this.

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(spoo)key 👻 @kmillz.lol · 3d

*unzipping your skin suit and peering in* got any room for me in there?

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Phantom Deeks 🫶 @deeks549.bsky.social · 3d

If you have nothing nice to say get ya a bsky account

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Chames @overlooked237.bsky.social · 3d

*brings a grilled cheese to a knife fight so someone will cut it into triangles for me*

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Frog and Toad Bot @frogandtoadbot.bsky.social · 1d

Then Toad fell asleep.

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undead girlfriend @hausofholes.bsky.social · Dec 1

sorry i can’t tonight i already freaked it

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Cortana 👻 @cortanav.bsky.social · 1d

When will my husband return from the Mariner’s game

Oil painting of a woman waiting by the sea

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Eric Replatformed @21stcenturyeric.bsky.social · 1d

Sex and/or the City

2 11 33

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sophia 🦇♥️🦇 @sophamir.bsky.social · 2d

i could never be a ceo i am likable

3 9 46

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Eric Replatformed @21stcenturyeric.bsky.social · 3d

One of the perks about working from home is that the timing is very flexible for my weekly shower.

1 10 44

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 1d

Reverse cowgirl, because the merry go round is more exciting facing backward.

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Fulkery @fulkery.bsky.social · 1d

I mean it’s like the world leaders just want Skynet to happen.

5 12

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Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 17h

If I really like you I’ll let you feel the dent in my head

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Frances "Are You Scared Yet" Meh @francesmeh.reviews · 2d

y'all please mastodon't

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🎃return of the Obra Deeny🎃(they/them) @geraldinepiche.bsky.social · 1d

🤠
________ 👉🏻
/ | • • | \ /
| \ / \/ Y
| | ° | E
👇🏻( 🍆💦 E
| | | | H
| | | | A
○ ○ W
| | | |
👢 👢

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Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 5d

this is what you get when you soak a german shepherd in mountain dew

Smiling chihuahua with black and tan shepherd coloring, bug eyes and missing front tooth.

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SpatialKimtamine @kimmalien.bsky.social · 13h

Swaddling my baby in a straitjacket

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alexis simpson @amutepiggy.bsky.social · 1d

they need to make a cigarette with vitamins

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Ian Fortified with Sexy (but spooky) Vitamins @ianfortey.bsky.social · 1d

Don't ever let anyone tell you you can't write impromptu Hamburglar erotica on the timeline. You can. No one will like it, but you can do it.

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chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 2d

The crust is in my eyelashes because these are my eyelid sandwiches.

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(spoo)key 👻 @kmillz.lol · 1d

it’s not a parasocial relationship if we’ve interacted, right guys?

right???

3 11 52

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d.ly @dly.bsky.social · 1d

at the 30th inning they just flip a coin

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Coach Jerry (referee 🔵) @gopher33j.bsky.social · 1d

When do the Yankees play their game 5?

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Steve Suckington @stevesuckington.bsky.social · 18d

WARDEN: and for your last meal?

ME: everlasting gobstopper

WARDEN: son of a

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